htg

2007-05-20T00:19:00.000+08:00

Photos! from yt and kiu's bday celebration..3oth April 2007.. dinner at Lau Pa Sat..one of our fav hangouts..and Minds Cafe..where we had a fun taboo session..=)
so long since we last took photos..cos its been so long since we went out..

HTG updated photo =)

STG! ^^

LTG =)

The main characters of the day =)

Group photo in Minds Cafe..=)

Great time spent together that day..photos..are but tools to remind us of the happy times..=)

2007-05-19T23:51:00.000+08:00

haha..its amazing..
that kiu acty bothered to update..
i do check on this blog once in awhile..dat's how i came across the updated post..
not forgetting the hint kiu gave thru his msn personal msg..

well..been quite long since we wrote here..
we can always give the reason tat we have all been busy with sch, army work and etc..
but in the end..we can deny the fact that we have been lazy..
no matter how busy we are..there muz hav been times when we were bored..and had nothing to do when we're online..
afterall..how much time does it take..to post sth here..
i admit..i'm guilty as charged..for being lazy..and the lack of concern for this blog..

this blog has come a long way..
can't really rmb how it started..but it holds evidence of the friendship and bonds between us..
am glad for the existence of this blog..
to testify for the friendship between the 7 of us..but then again..y wud we need evidence to prove the existence of friendship between us..
i dun tink it will be too much to say that deep down within us..we are all grateful that we've met each other along the way..well..at least its true for me..truly appreciative of you guys..and the things u pple have done for me..in a way or another..=)

looking back..it's really been a long time..
on reflection..i recall the times when we mugged together during the JC times..in Marina Sq and Suntec macs..those were our fav hangout locations..
the times we did maths qns tgt..me tearing my hair over differentiation, integration, trigo and wat not..
realised i do miss maths..not in the sense that i wanna do them..juz miss the sense of achievement and self-challenge experienced..and life's been kind to me in some way..never failing to send me a good maths tutor to help me with maths..mdm tan and mr ngoh..can't say that bout uni though..NTU tutors..no comments..

there's so many experiences shared among us through these yrs..the KBox sessions..mahjong sessions..or juz plain eating sessions..oh my..we've really been through alot..
haha..dunno y..juz feeling nostalgic..then decided to pen everything down..in a few mths time..5 of us will be in the same sch! feels good..=) looking forward to it..lunch tgt??
and if kiu does get hall 16 or 3..i wanna go visit! AIR CON! and dun worry..i'll pray for u that u dun get foreigner for room mate..=p

hmm..on a last note..
maybe its time to change our blogskin..but hor..i know nothing bout webpage design..so hmm..
perhaps yt can do us a favour??hee..u shd be pro in this by now..
kz..that's all i hav to say for now..i'll probably write another entry..to upload the pics from yt and kiu's birthday party..=)

take care peeps..till we meet again..probably somewhere near YC's bday..haha..its sad tinking bout it..that we only meet during bdays..but on a positive note..though our meetings are infrequent..our frenship has always withstood the test of time..
cheers to HTG! Luv ya peeps! =)

2007-05-17T22:38:00.000+08:00

hey evrybody...mayb i'm bored or smt...but while reading other's blogs...suddenly thought...why m i reading about what is happening in other pple's life, some of whom i can barely regard as friends. this blog's been dead for a v v long time...evry1's so busy...i dunno if it's only me...but i have almost no idea what's happening in you guys' lives now....haha....got some others wanted to say but think it's better i keep it to myself...

so i'll just get started myself and try to see explain wat's been going on in my life...starting from 2 yrs ago...haha....

army....was generally slack...loved e army experience in general cos of all the memories u'd neva get anywhere else...but wouldn't wanna go back in cos i cannot tolerate the "i say it...so it has to be done". doing senseless things just ain't right...unless u're doing it for e correct pple...

life now is probably even more slack...haha...q love my job...learnt alot of things there...esp how to use excel and word...haha...great colleagues...thou some have left...and e IA students are leaving...soon it'll be my turn..n last but not least love the great amt of freedom boss gives me to do my work...work done means good...if i can complete work fast can do my own stuff in office...dun think i'll get this anywhere in the working society next time...seriously hope they have some part time work for me to do so i can earn my allowance...papa not giving me allowance i think...sianzzz....

not looking forward to the uni experience...haha...mugging all over again...REALLY dread dozing off in lectures...n cross my fingers hard hard i can get hall 16...haha...or hall 3....aircon plus near MAE...if i can get then i think it'll be q a fun exp...staying alone(not exactly)...can try cooking to save money...as my friend say everything u need will be within an arm's distance...haha...but i dun think i'll change my anti-social stance...make friends with only those that i want...dun want to have to be forced to make "friends" just cos i haf to take part in some activity with them...only wasting time....

think that's all for now....tired...must sleep....

2006-06-21T23:27:00.000+08:00

haa..i tink tis is turning into my blog leh..muahaha..or more like wat i told yt..its turning into my dumping ground..hmm..dunno if dat's good or bad..

anyway..haven had such enjoyable dinner in a long time..HtG always make me realise the meaning of wat they mean by companion means more than de food or watever other material stuff there is..dunno if tonight's dinner was a budget 1..but i knoe i enjoyed it..from the bottom of my heart..thanks pple! =)

acty tonight's dinner was meant to celebrate yc's birthday..but end up he not free..faintz..den kenny had to go visit his aunt and baby cousin..so end up 5 of us..chaneng and timothy were free!that's rare..hee..but really glad to see them after so long..had a laughing good time during dinner at crystal jade ramen xiao long bao in suntec..i'm sorry chaneng..for "stealing" ur hp..making u look for it frantically..hehe..sorry to kiu for getting whacked for sth dat u din do..but it showed sth..its de pple la..haha..dat's y chaneng din suspect me or yt..but targetted tim and kiu right from the start..den de part we chatted bout kenny..wow wow wow!it was quite an amazing conversation..though none of us is sure how much of it is true and reliable info..haha..

dessert was yummy! fondue..oh my..choc and ice cream..both my favourite..with fruits..oiishi! i was wondering whether it was predestined dat we wud go to mini toons b4 dinner..so dat we could buy the marshmallows to dip in de choc..hehe..marshmallows..another of my fav..tink tonight's dinner was juz yummy beyond words..hehe..i wud wanna go Marina Square Food Court for dessert again..and i wanna sit outside de next time round..to enjoy the night view..long time since i went to see the night scene by the river le..wondering when will be the next time..

kiu bought FHM! it was like wow! never imagined..but i guessed he bought it to see the ranking of the 100 sexiest female of the years..hmm..steph song is really hot..so i guess she deserves the title..

dun really hav much things to say..juz wanted to blog..to show how much i appreciated the dinner tonight..really treasure the companion of u guys..there's always this invisible source of mental strength from u guys..that help tide thru all difficulties..Luv ya guys! =) *Hugz*

2006-06-16T00:55:00.000+08:00

i guess tonight was not really a good night..ok night?perhaps..but i tink its ok more on the negative side..
okie..there were good news today..de fact that i got into Banking&Finance for my business specialisation..but i tink dat was the only thing to get me happy..maybe plus de fact that i'm back in singapore ba..

sumtimes i tink too much curiosity is really bad more than good..always wanted to knoe some stuff..got to knoe it 1st hand tonight..but the answers are not exactly those tat will delight me..on the other hand..i tink i'm kinda saddened by them..though its not de 1st time dat tis has happened..still..i guess it still takes time before the feeling fades..

someone once asked me when do i stop liking a person..i din knoe how to ans..but i tink i knoe the ans now..its when i knoe there wun be any chance of development..when the hope dies down..and the feelings fade..it seems like an automatic process..juz that de diff part in this whole process..is ensuring that no frenship gets lost in de process..its sumthing i gotta try hard now..cos things juz wun be the same..

i'm beginning to tink i'm really quite strong emotionally..dunno how i acty manage to give advise despite feeling miserable..or maybe at tis pt in time..all i want is to help and make him happy..dat's y personal feelings come 2nd..and it doesn't hurt dat much at that pt in time..now dat its all quiet ard me..acty..it does feels kinda sad..but i believe this will pass..its quite a relief acty..knowing dat all de doubts hav been clear..i juz want him to be happy now..

was talking to a fren bout love..haha..wat an apt topic for tonight right..we were discussing our opinions on love..he feels dat it shd be unconditional..not dat i disagree..but i believe there shd always be give and take in all relationships..only then will the relationship be able to last..its tiring to be giving all the time..and if one is always recieving..he/she will not knoe the true meaning of love..and may take it for granted..

everyone hav diff definitions for love..in the different expectations dat we hav..some will want their partners to be calling everyday..some juz need the ocassional care and concern..love can be so simple yet complicated..

the self defence mechanism builds up after each time..at least dat's in my case..there this subconscious thing about protecting oneself from possible hurt..there will always be the concern bout whether this will work out..and how long will it last..there juz a thousand and 1 qns going thru my mind each time..i'm glad for these qns this time round..they stopped me from committing a mistake that might otherwise hav caused me embarassment..at least now we can remain frens..i'm contented..=)

i tink tis is retribution leh..wat goes round..comes ard..haha..

2006-06-04T20:30:00.000+08:00

watched xmen with st3 and kiu today..de show was not bad..liked it quite alot..although only 1 and half hr..it felt longer den that..and i like storm!she's so cool! wahaha..wonder wat's wrong with cyclops and wolverine..prefer jean grey to storm..bad taste! haha..i'm juz mumbling some crap..ignore me..iceman quite cool also..like de way he dealt with fireboy..fireboy too arrogant le la..tink his fire very powerful..no no..

after dat went PC fair with both of them..met kenny there..PC fair is madness! u really move by inch in there..getting from 1 booth to the next is 1 ardous task..buying things is another 1..the queues..if those are even considered 1..are scary..tink we managed to get some good bargains there..including YC's pressie..but..his pressie abit small..tink shd add things on..if not very pathetic..maybe during the next outing..when we watch The Omen?haha..yt been asking whether we wanna watch tis show..i dun mind..reminds me abit of emily rose though..hope it is not as eerie..

back to the PC fair..i bought a laptop cooler pad..like finally..been telling myself to treat my laptop better..finally..next on for my lappie..shall be a nicer mouse..hehe..but dat can wait..my present mouse and touchpad still working wel..*touch wood*..hopes it stays that way..helped my sis got a thumbdrive too..wahz..hers has bigger memory space but is cheaper la! UNFAIR! yt bought thumbdrive and cooler pad..kiu bought mini SD..kenny bought webcams..heee..=) 1st time i bought sth at PC fair..tink its really good bargain..beginning to understand y so many pple go for it..might decide to go for the next one..if i had sth in mind which i wanna buy..MP3 player?wait till then den see ba..

2006-06-02T23:30:00.000+08:00

juz came back from Patrina's wake..she looked like she was juz sleeping..no signs of having left us forever..read her obituary..wilson was described as her angel..its both sweet and saddening at the same time..saw him there too..i can only say he is strong..or maybe he was prepared for the worst..dat's y he can handle it so well..or maybe..its juz a strong front he is putting up..

i admit i was never close to Patrina..wud say that there was a period of time dat i even disliked her..but still..its saddening..tinking of how she will never get the chance to fulfil watever dreams she ever had..but at the same time..maybe she can be considered blessed..to hav a family and bf that loved her and stayed with her thru the worst time of her life..she probably had them by her side when she left too..may she rest in peace..

tis visit to her wake today made me tink alot again..made me wonder y is it dat i always meet up with the guides at such ocassions?the last being xl's wake..haiz..y?

lynette wee said we hav all grown up..and she said she dun wanna grow up..i agree with both statements..we have grown..since we left DHS..and i dun wanna grow up..it sux leh..tinking that i'm gonna turn 20 soon..haiz..sumtimes i juz wish time will standstill..maybe things are not perfect at the moment..but i'm contented and happy..dat's enough..isn't it?

i realised i can make frens easily..but i dun keep frens..u get wat i mean?as in my frens come in stages..they come and leave..frenship with HTG is probably the longest i hav ever maintained..5 yrs..and its alr the longest..sad..meeting up with the guides today made me realise i can make frens easily..but developing into close frens is another matter..keeping the frenship going is yet another matter altogether..tink my close frens really countable with my 2 hands..less than 10..pathetic hor?

i feel guilty..i wondered is it me dat is the problem?me not being active enough to take the effort to chat with all the frens online..is it really dat diff to say hi..ask how are u doing?or is it me..dat is juz too plain lazy..i tink its me..does it really take up so much time to meet up with frens once in a while?are there really other things that are more impt?or is it i juz dun want to meet up with them?yet again..it seems like the last is the ans..conclusion..i tink i'm a lousy fren leh..

these 2 days are random tots days..been tinking alot..but mostly negative tots..quite terrible..but i guess these random tots will teach me to chersh pple ard me more..not to take them for granted..not to be so 斤斤计较..life is juz give and take..dun need to take everything so seriously..

lost my train of tots le..juz jumbled up tots in me now..maybe when i'm inspired again..i'll share my tots here again..=)

2006-06-01T23:04:00.000+08:00

okie..dun ask me y..but i juz tot that tis might be the place for me to pen my tots down..maybe it is cos i tink i wanna share my tots with HTG..or maybe..i juz feel that tis is a safe place for me to share my tots..

been a long time since i last kept in touch with huiyi..de last time i saw her in person was probably 1 mth ago..when i saw her at cityhall MRT..chat with her for awhile dat time..but i guess it was a weird meeting..cos i was with my JC classmates and she was with her JC classmates..juz not the right time to catch up with each other i guess..de most recent time we contacted each other was on tues..when she smsed me to tell me that samuel chan is going to australia for a yr or so..asking whether i wanted to go and send him off on wed morn..if only it was in de evening..i would hav went..but it was at 715 in de morn..i could not make it..cos of work..at dat moment..i felt guilty..for abandoning a fren for work..a fren i called gor..haiz..guilty for having drifted apart after we went separate ways after sec sch..made me tink of the times we spent together in guides and scouts..reminded me of xl..

today..huiyi smsed me again..shocked me with the msg..it was regarding patrina's death..it was sudden news..i never even hear anything bout it before today..had totally no idea y she left us..after asking her..realised she had cancer..and tis time round..she lost to the illness in a relapse..it was more of shock..not sadness..maybe cos i was never close to her in the 1st place..so i din feel the stinging pain of losing a fren..the news settled in slowly..and it started me thinking..made me think alot..and that's de reason for this entry..

patrina's departure made me realise..life is really fragile..recently..there has been so much news about pple losing the battle against cancer..it shows dat cancer can strike everyone..it doesn't care if u're young or old..both xl and patrina fought against the disease..both won it once..and lost it the 2nd time..de unpredicability of life..we dun win all the time..winning once doesn't mean that we will win it again..we wun always be that lucky to have a 2nd chance at things..as for life..how many pple will acty get a chance to escape death and get to live it again?

2nd chance..what if there is no 2nd chance?i keep tinking bout tis qn today..have i ever missed sth and wished that there will be a 2nd chance for me to do whatever i want?if the 2nd chance never came..will it always remain a regret in my life?was tinking..wat is the biggest regret i will have if i never had a 2nd chance at things..i guess..it will be not having told those ard me how much they mean to me..even if they had only appeared in my life for a short while..maybe we hav never developed into close frens..maybe we were juz acquaitances..maybe we were always at loggerheads with each other..but i'm sure..they have all impacted the way i live..frens have brought joy and laughter to my life..those that i always bickered with would hav added some spice to my boring day once in awhile..

yupz..wanna tell pple how much i treasure their appearance in my life..no matter how short it is..but always find it hard to say it when i hav the chance..cos to me..telling someone how much they mean to u is sth so mushy..and i guess i was never brought up as 1 who is good at expressing feelings..haha..i guess the pple i hav told so far..is HTG..and prob some good frens here and there..those dat talk to me when i'm in the sentimental mood..i knoe not many pple will get to read this..but to all those tat i know and comes across this entry..thanks for appearing in my life..i really appreciate it!

other den making me ponder about 2nd chance..i also wondered..will contentment reduce the amt of regrets we hav?知足常乐..that's wat they always say..is it true?hmm..started looking back..was tinking wat are the biggest achievements at my diff stages of life..

starting from my 1st yr in uni..i tink my greatest accomplishment would hav been participation in my hall's cheerleading team..when i 1st joined..it was with a mentality of helping out..since i'm de smallest size in hall..and according to them..so suitable for cheerleading..so juz join lor..but after months of training..i fell in love with it..it became a passion..i looked forward to the training sessions..and i got pissed with myself when i could not do the stunts well..although we din get to compete at the interhall competition tis yr..the team spirit and support from each other really touched me..it really showed me the imptance of teamwork..and how encouragement can help each other along the way..the cheer day performance will always be a pride and joy of Unisus i tink..the images of everyone cheering after the performance is still so vivid in my mind..dun regret joining it at all..in fact..i'm looking forward to the coming cheerleading trainings tis yr..=)

okie..moving on to JC..i can't really tink of any major achievements..or accomplishments..does results count?acty in my opinion..results are lousy achievements..haha..dunno leh..i'm self contradicting..always working hard to get good results..but dun consider them as major achievements..if results were to be counted..den maybe i wud tink dat getting an A2 for GP is a good achievement..my english has never been good..and thanks to Mrs Noordin..an A2 was beyond my expectations..i only wanted a B3..i tink i owe her a big thanks..really glad i hugged her on results day..at least i showed my gratitude..i dun consider this an achievement..but i tink i've grown up quite abit in the JC days..in the mental sense..matured ba..it was a period of mental training for me..i wun deny that my JC days were one of my worse days i hav had in my close to 20 yrs of living..everyday in sch was living behind a mask..and for those days..i'm really grateful to Eugene..for always being there..helping me along unknowningly..

okie..backtrack to sec sch days..major achievements? i marvel at myself when i tink back bout those guiding days..those trainings..wonder how did i take it..though they were tough..i learnt alot thru it..the tower we built for orientation..oh my..it will always be part of my pride too..those fun days..my fren juz asked me..if i had the chance to go back in time..which period do i want to go back to..and i knew straightaway..my ans would be the sec sch days..cos i miss those days..it was fun..yet fulfilling..fighting along with everyone for our goals..to get into the JCs of our choice..and it was during those days..dat i met u guys..and formed this frenship..counting back..it has alr been 5 yrs..is dat long or short?i dunno..but 1 thing i knoe..i want tis frenship to last forever if possible..

there's so many things i wanna say..so many thoughts provoked tonight..but there's so little time i have..oh yah..i juz realised..this is a lousy excuse used by myself..to make myself feel better for the many things i could hav done but never did..cos i dun hav time..wat a lame excuse..but here i am..using it again..okie..i admit..i'm juz plain lazy..lazy to pen my tots down to words at this very moment..

if i rmb..i will write them down here the next time round..till them..take care pple..i miss u guys..till i see u again! =) dun wait for the right time..cos there's never the right time..dun give up a chance..cos there may never be a 2nd chance..

2006-05-03T15:42:00.000+08:00

heyz all..long long time since anyone updated tis blog..hmm..guess all were busy with sch or army stuff..but finally! the long awaited break is here for the uni pple! woohooo..yeah! =) i tink HTG got this weird tradition..either we dun meet in a very long period of time..or we meet very often within a short period of time..tink de last time we met was before timothy's birthday..which seems like 1 mth plus from now..oooh..tis reminds me..dat shd be the last time i went town b4 exams started..haha..watever..no link to watever i wanna say..

kkz..back to the main topic..we finally met up again! hmm..not full attendance..but i guess we are all used to it..wondering if the missing 1 will even get to see the post..haha..oops..hmm..it was thanks to yt's birthday chalet..dat we got to meet up! thanks st 3! okie..de chalet was from 29 Apr to 01 May..but HTG only showed up for 29th..hee..sorry gal! guess dat sunday is a busy day for all of us..

anyway..i arrived late dat on 29 also..but i guess de short time together was all dat we asked for..times spent with HTG always teaches me the meaning of quality instead of quantity..u pple are wat my fren describe as comfort zone..juz de bunch of pple whom i knoe i can be crazy and not hav to worry..thanks for always being there! really treasure u guys! *hugz*

anyway..there were bbq food ready for me de moment i arrived dat day..wow! like since when do i get ready made bbq food?!?! feel so pampered for once..muahaha..basically..there were 6 out of 7 pple present for the chalet..and de missing 1 made his presence felt..by transforming into Nokia 6280..haha..yesh timothy..we knoe u are still part of us! =p

okie..guess we are all growing old..sad..how i knoe? cos somehow..i tink chalet doesn't interest us anymore..we din really manage to find much things to do dat night..played bridge..and tried mini mahjong..but soon..we grew bored of both..ended up watching some Andy Lau movie on ch 8..den..we all juz gave up tryin to stay awake..went to sleep at 2+..okie..kenny and me slept..yc shd be de 3rd to fall asleep..yt and kiu were de last 2 survivors of de night..how i knoe?haha..cos after i slept..i woke up a few times..de 1st time to discover yt gone..2nd time kiu gone..3rd time..both back! i dun even know how long they were gone..juz knoe they left and came back..muahaha..

next day..kenny woke up de earliest! he disappeared at 7+..and i still dunno how he left de chalet..cos i slept next to the door..but dun rmb him opening leavin by de front door..tsk tsk..silent walker..den we all woke up..den it was Mac breakfast..yum yum..Mac breakfast delivered to doorsteps on a Sunday morn..wat a luxury! truly enjoyed it..after which YC left..me,yt and kiu watched "The Art of Seduction" on yt's lappie..its a super funny and lame show can!

den i had to leave too..to go for my uni fren's birthday celebration..clarke quay is really beautiful at night! next time got chance we shd go together..really..

kkz..we met up again yest..2nd May..to watch Daisy..its an action romance movie..i tink it was well done..somehow..the 2 elements juz blend very nicely together..i knew of the plot b4 watching de movie..knew there were some sad parts in it..but din expect de ending..quite tragic..haiz..dunno leh..somehow..de lovers were juz not destined to be together in de show..but overall..de movie is good..shd go watch it..st2..even though u are a not a supporter of Korean shows..tis 1 is an exception from de typical show..shd try watching..

hmmm..yest meeting was a short 1..dunno leh..it juz make me wonder if Orchard is really not a place for us..we seem aimless after watching the movie..maybe its juz me prejudiced against Orchard..or maybe i am juz not cut out for shopping..haha..

okie..dat's all for update..nothing much to write..or maybe i juz decided to cut down on de details..scared dat it wud bore whoever is reading it..

wanted to add de pics in..but realised i dun really know how to do it..haha..maybe next time when i figure out how ba..that's all for now..tataz! take care pple! Seeya soon!=)

2006-02-02T10:08:00.000+08:00

Hello folks! The perpetually missing sotong is here!

Yt passed your present to me last night.. i really like it! thanks so much. =) i immediately wore it today and a lot of ppl commented on the fur. haha. good comments, of course. i told yt this is my 4th casual jacket and 7th jacket (in general). she said that i can wear a different one every day of the week. hehe. cool! i really really like it and many thanks once again!

So sorry i couldnt join u guys on tuesday. argh. hope all of you are still lovely and well. i'm fine too, except for the amt of weight i put on due to CNY. gaaahh. hope we can meet up soon.. SMU and NTU's midterm break coincides this sem! hope we can make sth happen then.

ok, i must get back to my communications class. i think my HC gp tutor is way better than my prof, can u imagine? sigh. take care ppl!

2005-12-27T00:30:00.000+08:00

haiz..i dun like this feeling..i know i have no rights to interfere in other pple's relationship..but why do pple like to do things this way? it juz confirm that the thing i hate most in life is pple lying to me..whether intentional or unintentional..can't we make things simpler by being more truthful? is telling the truth really that diff?or do pple like to do things the in-between way?i feel so lost suddenly..

blur after reading the 1st paragraph??haiz..juz confused at how pple handles relationships..why act blur when u are so sure of the other party's feelings for u?why tell pple it is impossible between the 2 of u when its a 2-sided feelings affair?why deny and give another person hope when all u can give in de end is disappointment?i feel sad for the guy who is hurt in de end..but there's nothing i can do..i dunno wat to say to make him feel better..and i feel kinda pissed looking at the 2 of u..argh..i hate it when friends within my social circle develops into a couple and denies it all the way till they can no longer hide it..i mean can't u juz admit it when it is already so obvious to the others??can't u make the lives of others easier by telling them their intuitions are correct?!?!?! is it really tat diff to do to prevent pple frm getting hurt?!?!?

okie..someone tried explaining to me why pple like to play this in-between game..makes me wanna scold vulgarities la..maybe cos i dun believe in this theory..tat's y it juz seems like lame excuses to me..the person told me its a natural reaction to deny when pple ask about the possibilities bout 2 frens developing into a couple..i was tinking to myself..what natural reaction?!?!?!there are so many other options available la!i mean if u dun want pple to get the wrong idea..dun do things dat give pple those ideas!if it is unavoidable..sudden urge to show ur feelings..u can always keep quiet when asked bout the possibilities!u dun have to deny..wat more outright denial!!argh..do u knoe how frustrating it is to realise dat pple have been bluffing to u?!?!even more frustrating for a person like me who HATES being lied to...AHAHAHAHAH!

"jiu3 zui4 3 fen1 xing3"..maybe only after drinking will pple says wat is really deep down in their hearts..if they never drank..maybe i wud have never known about it..wud it have made me feel better if i din find out that they were lying to me?wud i hav felt better if i knoe tat 1 of the party really din knoe de other party felt sth for her..argh..but tell me..which idiot can't tell dat a guy is interested in her if she slept with her on the same bed and de guy hugged her to sleep!!!tell me its normal behaviour in singapore!bished!!!

i knoe i am weird..sorry..i dunno y i am so against pple lying to me..esp in the aspect of relationships..maybe cos i juz can't agree with the in-between affairs way of thinking..are in-between behaviours supposed to allow u to try out with diff guys till u find out who is de better 1 for u??and if dat's de intention..dun be so dumb as to tell the other guy some guy hugged u to sleep!dun u hav any idea how much it will hurt that guy?!?!doesn't common sense tell u dat it is insensible?!?!if i can..i wud bang u till u are awake and aware of wat u hav done..ha..all ur talk bout remaining single for the whole uni life..the talk bout staying trouble-free for the coming year..more trouble instead i guess..

haha..i knoe i sound angry and pissed thruout this whole post..but tis is really wat i am tinking right now..ever since x'mas eve night..can't sort it out in my mind..tried convincing myself..tried finding ways and excuses for the things pple did..didn't work..de more i tot of it..de more pissed i got..i wun interfere in whatever u guys do now..juz gonna keep my life simple..i'll stand aside and watch wat comes out of this..praying hard that u wun hurt anyone else further..

sorry HTG for having to read thru this crap post..juz had to get it out..i mean i can't complain to my frens in hall..cos they are the pple involved..and the ones trying to convince me bout this in-between thing..wahaha..seems like hugging de opposite sex to sleep is normal to them..argh!!!wat are pple thinking?!?!?!i knoe i might be a bit extreme in this case..juz let me hav my crazy moments once in a while too..=)

2005-12-25T11:18:00.000+08:00

ge wei xiang qing fu lao...wo hui lai le...hmmm...how was everybody's x'mas eve and x'mas...wonder if kenny spent it with mei nv(s)...da4 lu4 mei wor...hmmm...who knows...love blossoming overseas sounds cool...okie...some pple must be wanting to hit me le...hmmm...so ya...wat did evry1 do leh...

let's c...x'mas eve was spent at my uncle's place this yr...no...1st part of e morning was at my tutee's place...n he betta wake up his idea! stop yawning in lesson can...boring oso must listen...is it me or is it e lesson that's boring? hmmm..okie...prob both..anw...x'mas eve this yr had 1 big missing element...nice food!!! cannot eat..cos of stupid food poisoning i had...tummyache till shouted out in pain...cannot eat rubbish for a few days...

now i need to fig out wat to do today le...tata...

2005-12-04T13:52:00.000+08:00

yoz pple..i wonder if i am plain lazy during sch term or is it that i am more hyper during the holidays..haha..suddenly feel quite on bout blogging again..hmmm..juz tot of another reason for the increased in frequency of blogging..maybe cos there are HTG events worth blogging about only during the holidays when everyone is free for a meet up once in a while..

okie..went tamp KBOX with yt and kiu yest..1st comment..food at tamp KBox still sux as much as before..even though we already ordered the most edible meal available..but i guess when we go for KLunch..what we are after is the singing experience and not the lunch..eh..sang quite a number of songs..mostly new songs..guess it shows how long we hav not been to Kbox..dunno y ah..the 3 of us chose to sing without the microphones yest..most of the times..we sang without it la..anyway..what i remember most from the singing session was the song "夜曲" it was humming in my brain a long time after we left the place la..haunted by it..

after Kbox..met up with Kenny..found out there's nothing to do in tamp..so we decided to go down to Yaochen's hse..seems like we had to see him yest ah..he dun wanna come out so we go look for him lor..wahaha..went there..started watching "童梦奇缘"..hmmm..its a fiction show..dunno how to comment on it also..but juz like YC said..the ending is touching..quite sad la..cos pple sometimes realise their mistakes too late to make any amendments..even worse..they wun even be given the chance to start all over again..oh well..this is life..

okie..the guys left for soccer..seems like they haven touched the ball in ages ah..left me and yt in the hse..cont watching movies..YC hse can open rental shop liaoz..enough shows to entertain us for the whole day if we needed to..watched "三个好人" next..typical singaporean movie..half the movie was in dialect..i shd say hokkien..if u dun understand hokkien..its as bad as watching some korean,japanese,french show..a look at the life of ex-convicts..sad case..new insight on how we shd view these pple..give them a new chance for survival..

eh..basically..after that it was waiting for the guys to come back from their soccer session..and waiting for pizza to arrive..wahaha..pizza hut's pizza shrinked in size!! their large pizza looked like a regular 1 la..but it was nice to eat pizza after a long time..and it seems like a common practice to order pizza whenever we are at YC's hse..HTG habit??had ice-cream after dinner..cookies n cream and chocolate..ice-cream is always heavenly..hehe..=p

we tried watching "Forgotten" after dinner..but its either the player's or the CD's fault..we never got past the time 17'08 of the 2nd disc..argh..frustration..but after tryin a few times..it was time to go home le..we all left..only Kenny stayed..fought with YC for the bed?!?!

okie..tis is a narrative post..not much personal feelings in it..tried to make it more happening and interesting to read ah..budden..doesn't seems like it leh..alamak..whatever la..juz a sudden urge to post something..so it ended up here..

seeya guys soon! take care wor..smilez! =)

2005-11-25T14:04:00.000+08:00

hey..long time since i updated on my life..let's see..i had mugging period..den exams..den post-exams..one by one..hehe..

mugging period is anytime before the actual paper i guess..not very productive..always easily distracted by tv..net..msn..etc etc..sigh..mugging styles for every modules varies greatly..some muz memorise..some muz research..some muz understand and give examples..a very stressful period!

exams even more dun need to say..very very scared seriously..muz dabao..wad someone said was v true..it's A's every 3 months once agn..i just hope to pass..and i hope my term time projects will help abit..

post-exams shd be most happening ba..or most un-happening..depending on how u view work..yes..i've been working shortly after my exams until now..so that's abt 2 wks alr..i got 3 part-time jobs..first to commence is this door-to-door survey for mcys, second is the waitressing job at noodle house ken, last is the telephone survey in my sch..

but notice i said i started working shortly after my exams ended? so for that very short period of free time i watched alotof shows and movies! haha..some legitimately in cinemas, some dl-ed..i shall provide a short review on each..

the exorcism of emily rose. it was scary..but doesn't last long..and it sets you pondering abt the existence of god and demons once agn..cos it was filmed from a religious perspective rather than the scientific one..it shows the priest's narration of the process..and it will affect your judgment more or less..for me i start to believe a little in demons..not so much god cos he wasn't really mentioned..it was more focused on the dark forces..yea..initially i was very convinced that emily was epileptic and definitely not possessed..but as the film progresses..it will sway you a little..

saw 2. this is obviously illegitimate..since it's not even out yet. i wonder if it helps doing a review here..cos i dunno if anyone here has watched saw 1. anyway, it has less of the emotional and psychological erm..torment..present in saw 1..and more physical pain and outright torture..how do i explain this..hmm..for saw 1..it affected me because i feel desperate and helpless for the victims..i see how they struggled to survive..i feel like i'm in their situation but cannot do anything to help..whereas for saw 2, it's just the normal feeling of watching a horror film..knowing what's going on and just expecting to see what happens next..the victims dun really have a chance to struggle and it dampens the whole saw spirit..or culture..or however you say it..cos ya..victims are supposed to help themselves and each other out of the situation..but in the second film it's all selfish moves and a pointless twist..that's how i see it..

desperate housewives season 1. i finally did it! haha..catching up on what i've missed..it's seriously a addictive series..i can spend one whole aftn just watching it..and i finally understand the plot for myself..it's not entirely bimbotic without a basis..but just slightly. haha. aiya..it has all genres of drama fitted into one wad..it has to have its funny bits. anyway, i enjoyed it greatly! getting a little irritated by bree though..

desperate housewives season 2. just a continuation from the last episode of season 1..where mike returns home to where zach is waiting with a gun..yea..only got episodes 1 to 6..and just a spoiler here..mike and susan might breakup! cos susan indirectly sent zach away..i guess u all have to watch it to understand..dun wanna put too many spoilers here..hehe.

i also re-watched butterfly effect and charlie and the chocolate factory. and..i have sin city, friends seasons 1 and 2, a bittersweet life (laogong's latest film! -squeals- ), wait till you grow older (andy lau's film, where he lives thru a whole lifetime in a day), coach carter, just like heaven, and full house (song hye kyo and rain's drama serial!!) unwatched! hehe..i know i've committed a double sin by being a media student AND a pirate..so..ya..i've stopped.. :\ on a brighter note, next time htg got stayover dun need to rent vcd? (:

wow, i still haven't mentioned my jobs yet..haha! the two survey jobs dun really need to describe la huh..since no fixed working hours one..but still, if you all have friends/relatives who are single and btw 25-44 years old, just tell me k! and try to convince them to help me do the survey! it's abt finding out more abt the dating attitudes of singles..yup..

noodle house ken! it's at orchard plaza..the brown and old building u see after walking past OG in the plaza sing direction..can come for htg dinner if u all want..though i dun work everyday..and abit ex..haha..prices similar to ajisen..but the food is better than ajisen according to the japanese..yup..it's fun working there..haha..the boss, whom we call ken-san..is very friendly and jovial..haha..speaks broken english with alotof sound effects and gestures..another kitchen helper whom we call auntie oso very cute..haha..always chuan2 chu1 fei3 wen2 with ken-san..yesterday really laugh until wanna die..their actions alr funny enough..den somemore got language problem..niu tou bu dui ma zui..so alw muz repeat..so laugh alotof times..very hard to describe la..but they're a cute and funny bunch..and yesterday auntie say i learn very fast! so happy..hehe..

learnt alotof things there..like the japanese names for some food, how to deal with cash, nets and credit cards, how to serve customers, how to notice little things around you..it's always good to try a new kind of job..until now i've did waitressing/cashier, telemarketing, surveying, data entry, admin..used to think sales is something i'll never do..but now i think it's not impossible..as long as you're not afraid to try.. (:

yep..hope you all are reading after your exams..so in that case hurray! welcome to the holidaying club! haha..i'm going to the airport to pick kiu up..around midnight..haha..he's finally back!! yayyy! htg outing should materialise soon :D

2005-11-20T22:17:00.000+08:00

heyz all! =) long long time never write in here..long long time since we had a HTG outing too..i miss ya guys terribly! acty..i also dunno how long will it be b4 u guys acty see tis post..but i juz had the urge to tell u guys how much i miss u! oh gosh..suddenly..i'm getting goosebumps for all de stuff i juz said..

guess uni life and NS life are really depriving us of time..sigh..i miss the free time we used to have..the time when we could meet up every now and then..our gatherings at suntec roof garden..how long has it been since we last did that? when was our last meal together?!? sobz..when will be our next meeting?

any stayover this holiday? guess i would be spending majority of my nights in hall...thanks and no thanks to cheerleading training..every tues,thurs and fri night..from 8pm to 12am..woohoo..wat weird timing..leaves me free yet not free..but i wun mind spending some time to meet up!cos i want to! oh yeah..talking bout stayover..now dat me and yt has hostel rooms..if there is any stayover..chaneng could always sleep in our rooms..with the guys staying over at kenny's house..wahaha..crazy idea?

i've got 1 last paper..tis coming friday..25th..forensic science..its an elective..which explains y i am so unbothered bout it..to acty hav the time to acty write an entry..tink the NUS and SMU pple either juz started with their exams..or waiting for it to start..so to ken and chaneng..jiayou!!!! All the best! U're the smart pple in HTG..from HCJC leh..sure can do it..once its over..let's go and have some fun!

i still wanna go to pulau ubin!!!when are we going?!?!?!

till we meet again..hopefully soon kz..dun let me wait wait wait..juz tell me when u all will be free..i'll be the organiser tis time round! =) Luv ya guys! take care yeah? seeya..smilez! big big smile! big sunny smile! =)

2005-11-12T17:30:00.000+08:00

Heyhey

Short excerpt for you guys to think about during this examination period :) (from a fren in my yunnan thing)

Keep fighting on.

:D LOTR [The Two Towers] [Frodo giving in to despair and doubt]

Sam:It's like in the great stories, Mr Frodo.The ones that really mattered.Full of darkness and danger they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end, because how could the end be happy?How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing... this shadow.Even darkness must pass.A new day will come. And when the sun shines, it will shine out theclearer.Those were the stories that stayed with you that meantsomething. Even when you were too small to understand why.But I think, Mr Frodo, I do understand.I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't.They kept going because they were holding on tosomething.

Frodo:What are we holding on to, Sam?

Sam:That there's some good in this world, Mr Frodo.And it's worth fighting for.

Meanwhile take care guys! :)

2005-09-20T19:45:00.000+08:00

i'm here! waiting for my publicity meeting to start at 8pm..gotta make this chop chop! charging my hp now..went thru one whole day with a batt-less phone..how miserable that is..anyway, damn stressed..the next few wks will be super busy cos there will be proj deadlines to meet on top of the never ending hall stuff to do..and exams are coming!! O.o seems like proj meetings are not very effective..or efficient..the same with hall stuff..the result of signing up for all the subcomms! my fren jus told me tdy tt she wouldn't wanna stay in hall 6 next yr..i had the same sentiments during oc..but well..became more neutral as time passes by..not saying that i have a choice though..stil have to rely on the points system..esp since i'm not a v sporty person who can jus accumulate points by playing games i'm good at..sports ppl are lucky! whee..ever since coming into uni..i wished i had more time for everything..24 hrs is really not enough! give me more time to sleep and study, most imptly! ironic rite..that the primary purpose of staying in hall has been defeated by its nature. oh well..can't think of any ideas for proj..mind block sucks! just as unproductive group members. :/ like myself. haha! ok..gotta change le..prepare to go down..bye! hope to see ya all soon! the last outing was fun! (:

2005-08-26T02:46:00.000+08:00

sigh..it happened again..kz..maybe its less traumatising this time..cos i do not know the person personally..but looking at the sad faces ard me..reminds me of how we all looked on july 26 last yr..i remember at tat time..i told myself..i dun wanna go thru the pain of losing a fren again..yet we lost someone again..fragility of life..

how irony..25 Aug..birthday of a senior..yet it has also become the death anniversary of another..can't imagine the feeling of the birthday boy..he looks ok..but deep down within..i tink he's probably not feeling too good..argh..the mood is so solemn now..

can't really put my tots into words now..juz wanna say..hey pple..take care kz..nothing is too much..and if things are really bad..it means its not the worst..always remember we'll be there for you..miss ya guys..love ya guys..

2005-08-13T13:47:00.000+08:00

hiz all..blogging in my hostel room on a sat afternoon at 1.45pm..gonna go home after this..not supposed to be here acty..cos i was supposed to go for the WSC RSPID thingie at some home in Bukit Timah..but i'm too tired and lazy to go..after the hall ball last night..

Life in NTU is happening..mostly thanks to the fact that i am staying in hall..with alot of hall events going on every week..not sure if this will cont for the rest of the sem..or is it juz bcos it is the beginning of sch term..when pple are more free to organise events and settle admin stuff such as choosing new committees to cont leading us..

gotta say perceptions changed alot..met many kinds of pple in NTU..as time goes by..i start to realise that things dun really seem wat they are at times..lotsa changes..politics?not sure though..gotta admit that uni provides exposure to many more diff kind of guys out there..among my guy seniors..there are those that feels like frens..and those that feels like a big bro too..really grateful to those that hav treated us as sisters..its a very overwhelming feeling acty..to have someone caring for you even though we are not couple related..the thoughtfulness..its really the small things added up that matters..no need for big actions..if u are sincere..we are able to feel it..

things are complicated..sometimes pple dun seem to be speaking their mind..no idea whether to believe wat they say..actions and words are different..i guess most of them are still at the uncertain stage..not sure wat kind of developments they want..and not sure of the outcome..afraid to face it?i'm more of an observant in these situations..choosing to believe that when the parties tell me sth..they mean it..but somehow uncertain bout my own judgement too..

guess i hav seen the other side of most pple..the side that is so diff from the way they act when in front of a big grp..conclusion is that most of them are kind at heart..things they do might be for some reasons..i prefer the personal side to them..its closer to heart..more sincere..and touching at times..

haha..it's quite a messy entry..i'm not exactly sure wat i am writing also..juz knoe that it is time for me to go home..tots are typed as they whizzed thru my mind..no organisation done..presented in the more real form..take care pple..miss u guys..long time since our last HTG meet up..no updates on how u pple are getting on..if u do see tis..do a favour?write a short entry..or juz tag on how have u all been...=)

2005-08-05T02:40:00.000+08:00

sigh..saddening day..never felt so small and useless before..are my interview skills that lousy..or am i lousy by myself..can't help but think tis way..cos i choose to tink that all seniors are just..dun tink they left me out on purpose..but y is it that i am not in any of the subcomms i applied for..

i know i am not outstanding..neither am i attractive..i juz wanna join the sub comms to earn my points to cont staying in hall next yr..i love hall 1..i love the seniors..the freshies..miss the fun we hav had together..y make me go thru 2 rounds of interviews when others only go thru it once..am i really that lousy??i really wanna join those sub comms i signed up for..i'm really interested in being a part of them..

feel so neglected..so disappointed..so discouraged..those who are already in subcomms ask me to cont trying at the 2nd round of recruitment..but they dunno the agony..who do i tell..and wat's the use..sigh..for the 1st time i feel so dejected ever since coming to hall..

y give me hope when all i get in return is disappointment...sigh..

2005-07-30T10:47:00.000+08:00

argh..i am angry..the entry i spent an hour on this morning is not posted..did i do sth stupid?!?!

hmmm..the tot of having to retype wat i wrote tis morning is sianz..but i wanna share my fun with u guys..so i guess i have to retype again..bless me..

kz..my Hall Orientation was from 17 to 23 Jul..was kinda uncertain bout going to the camp at 1st..cos din know how it will turn out..somemore it was a 1 week camp..so long! was afraid i wun be able to take it la..

went to hostel on the evening of 17 Jul..hmmm..met up with the seniors and freshies..we played some ice-breaker games..learnt some family cheers..watched video clips made by the OMC and JCRC..learnt some time-passing games from the seniors that night..games that required no playing equipments..after that went out for supper with my roomie and her fren..he drives! cool..slept at 2+ that night..

18 Jul (2nd day)..official start of the orientation camp..in the morn we played games in the form of telematch..was split up from our families to form new grps..the weather was bad..rained the whole morn..spoilt the fun..after lunch we cont with more games..got to see the extent of NTU Hall 1 forfeit for the 1st time..oh my..,the forfeits were rather disgusting..played night game that night too..they story was illogical..but yupz..overall the day was fun..=)

19 Jul (3rd day)..we met up at 7.15am that day..headed down to Sentosa after breakfast..wahaha..the start of a tiring day..played lotsa beach and water games..the most exciting 1 had to be water wrestling..wow! realised that gals in my family are strong..haha..cos we won! its amazing how gals can fight so fiercely..on the shoulders of guys in water somemore..had night walk in Sentosa nature trail that night..hmmm..can't say i was not scared..cos i was grabbing my partner's arm thruout the walk..but wat was more scary was that the walk seems neverending..according to my partner..we walked for half an hour..tink that's long for a night walk..i was lucky..went back in the early bus..got to sleep ard 2+ when the rest slept at ard 4+..

20 Jul (4th day)..we went for this record breaking feat organised by the Joint Hall Orientation Committee..wahaha..it was lame..making us stand in circles under the hot sun..but hehe..not bad wor..my 1st partner was rather shuai..and he is gentlemanly! my partner for the rest of the event was not bad too..another gentleman i guess..helping to gather the stuff needed for the scavenger hunt..and yes..according to the organising com..we broke the record for the greatest number of blind dates to be organised in a time period of 12 hrs..hmmm..whether it will be recognised in the Guiness World Records is another thing la..hehe..went home that day..cos it was my bro's birthday..the rest of the family went for city walk in the city area and SP night..

21 Jul (5th day)..went back to join them in the morn..played some wet/dirty games in the morn..after that it was pool games for the rest of the day..i was stranded la..cos i can't swim!!!so i had a boring day..the night was more fun..we had rehearsals for skit and cheer fight cheer from 1 till 4+ that night..everyone was running high on adrenaline..slept at 5+ and woke up at 7+ the next day..super tired..

22 Jul (6th day)..last day of camp..could feel the sadness and "yi yi bu she" feeling starting to build up..can't believe 1 week is going to be over so soon..it was FIBA (Fight in Built-up Area) in the morn..i missed out on the fun! cos i was supposedly their boss and my job was to hide and not be caught when the rest of the family members were out on the frontline attacking and defending..but i tink it was fun for them..esp those who got to torture the POWs..muahaha..after dat we headed down to Camp Christine for activities for the rest of the day..we played more disgusting games that day..but my family was super on..we did the forfeits and stuff without whines..encountered the most disgusting forfeit that day..sucking up whip cream squeezed onto the guys..super yucks! i hate whip cream!we had campfire that night..our chance to peform our skit..the 1 we practised so hard for..and cheer fight cheer..cheer fight cheer was stressful..tink we all wanted to impress our seniors..but we had a happy ending..Garfios rockS! we won the "best family performance", "best cheer fight cheer" and "best family" awards..even the "best female freshie" was from our family..we only left out the "best male freshie" award..everyone was happy beyond words..really grateful to the help given by the seniors..they made it possible..after that it was back to sch for initiation..

23 Jul (7th day)..haha..acty activities for this day was done in the wee hours..cos we were tekan by seniors from 1+ to 5+ that day..tink everyone was used to being dirty and smelly..and our seniors were kind enough..so yupz..everyone din complain much..juz went thru the initiation process..the hardest part being staying awake..after everything ended..and we were allowed to unblindfold..it was a comical sight..to see how dirty everyone was..but its a great feeling..cos from that moment onwards..we were juniors of Hall 1..no longer freshies! We are officially Oners of NTU..Yeah! =D

hmmm..gotta write faster and more summarised ah..cos its getting late..kkz..starting from 25 Jul..lessons start proper for NTU students..but year 1 had it easier..only lects..no tutorials..so sad..keep losing my way ard the campus..luckily had some seniors to act as "tour guide"..lects were ok so far..the lecturers were audible..no foreigners for lecturers so far..but they were boring..keep wanting to sleep during lects..keep going supper with seniors at night..tink my gate climbing skills gonna improve by de end of 3 years..=p

went clubbing for the 1st time on friday (29 Jul) night with my hall pple..it was supposed to be our Hall Bash cum Paegent Preview for Hall Ball..the venue was Cocco Latte..hmm..the place is small..and super crammed..Poh Suan was so pretty! the rest of the contestants looked good too..drank alcoholic drinks for the 1st time yest..hmmm..played drinking games and shared drinks with my family pple cos we were drinking from the jugs..according to the seniors..the drinks were very diluted..so yupz..i only got high..but not drunk..it was a not bad experience la..can understand y pple go clubbing to destress..found out lotsa secrets from the game..the "Never Ever Game"..quite shocked at the findings..but its fun to knoe that everyone was so honest..=) saw some pple get drunk..its quite humorous..when they start doing funny things..but quite ke lian also la..cos they hav no idea wat they are doing..went supper with them..nice prata..wonder if it was the prata that caused my sore throat today..

kkz..done with my updates for 2 weeks..dunno if it is entertaining..but its a long long entry..and to tink i did it twice! oh my..if u were bored..i'm sorry!

2005-07-28T00:23:00.000+08:00

hiz pple..i'm in hostel now..using my room mate's laptop..din hav any updates for the past week..as you all know..i was in hall orientation camp..it was fun! shall give you abit of update on it..

hmmm..my orientation theme was "Advampture"..my orientation group name is "Garfios".."Garfios is a combi of the name of Garfield and Odies..yupz..i had very nice seniors during the camp..and we were a very peace-loving bunch of pple..even though we had a very great urge to win..we dun fight with pple..and seniors always encourage us to win by abit only..haha..super funny pple..

aiya..seriously..i'm not in the mood to write a blog entry now..juz heard some sucky news..spoilt my night..i'll cont another time kz..see ya!

2005-07-14T10:53:00.000+08:00

heyz all..been a very long time since i last wrote an entry in here..the past few entries were either written when i am in office or on sat when i'm slacking at home..but for the past 2 weeks..my house com was down! and i was too busy in office to acty hav spare time to write an entry..hmmm..sounds like they are all excuses..kz..shall not defend myself further..not contributing is not contributing..no excuses will help..

kz..let me write the proper stuff..my main aim of blogging..
i'm officially unemployed too..haha..it's like after so long right..so some may be tinking wat's the big deal..most pple hav already stopped working so long ago..hmmm..it was quite a sad afternoon on my last day..quite sad to leave after staying there for close to 7 months..i've got very nice colleagues there..whom i miss as i stay at home now..but i'm glad that at least i took pictures with them..so i have something as remembrance..=)

very fast wor..another 2 more weeks from now..and it will be a year since xianliang left us..hmm..still tink of him every now and then..and watching the fundraising shows for NKF Cancer Foundation just brought back memories of him..was tinking to myself..wat an "appropriate" time to hold the show..it might not mean anything to others..but i tink those that remember wat happened during this period of time last year might share my tots..

yupz..another 2 weeks..and it will be back to sch for me and yt..that's fast..really fast..sometimes i regret working for so long..it's like i'm left with so little time to myself..to fulfil the things i wanna do..like going to pulau ubin..FOC for halls starts tis sunday for me..and up till now i am still pondering over whether i shd go..i want to go..pple ard me encourage me to go for the camp..i wanna experience wat orientation camp in uni feels like..heard so much about it..seems like so much fun..most pple ard me hav gone for the camps or are going for the camps..was thinking bout this to myself yest..could not get to sleep bcos of this..sounds abit incredible hor..but i always get insomnia when my mind gets too active thinking bout stuff at night..went to bed at 12.30am..but tink i only slept at 1.30am..sigh..den the first thing i tot of when i woke up this morn also bout the camp..sigh..in de end..tink my final answer wud be that i wun be going for the hall camp le..measured the pros and cons..pros..get to hav lotsa fun before sch starts..know your hallmates.knoe your seniors..but the cons is that i could use the extra one week spent in camp on preparing for sch..been comforting myself that it is ok not to go for the orientation camps..cos you will still get to know the pple you wann know in the next 3 years in course..or the next yr in hall..sounds like self-delusion..haz..

we'll see how things go when i go down to NTU to pay my acceptance fees and collect my keys tml..then if i can get most of the things settled by sat..i might be able to go for my orientation camp on sunday..let's just wait and see how things develop ba..

hmmm..kenny is at his med faculty camp now..yt and chaneng orientaton camps start next week..hav fun pple! =)

2005-07-04T16:59:00.000+08:00

heyz! i'm officially unemployed, agn! this time for good. unless tuition is considered employed. but anyway! since the rest of june 24th wasn't updated..shd i have the honour then? :D since i finally have time..

June 24th!
9:20pm, we met at tampines mrt platform. we as in yc, kiu, sq and me! then we took mrt to tanah merah mrt to Cross The Platform And Transfer To Another Train. reached Changi Airport at close to 10pm, a lil later than we thought..cos ce's flight's supposed to reach at 9:50pm!! oh well, none of us have her flight number, just knew it's an SQ flight arriving from Jerusalem..and none of the arrivals we saw was coming from there. never mind, we figured out that she will probably take a transit flight..and went on to find out from the information counter. and voila! we managed to find out the belt number cos we saw SQ69 on the arrivals list!

10+pm, yay..after some waiting..and marveling at the changes in Changi Airport at Belt 38, Chan Eng is out!! anyway, right outside Belt 38 is also the IOC Recep. back to ce. hehe, still as blur as ever! took some time to find us, haha. i guess the feeling of coming out of the glass doors and seeing ppl coming to pick ya up must be great yea? saw her parents too..haha, her mum's damn funny..after 2weeks of not seeing her daughter she greeted her by giving her a smack on the butt. cooool. after some decision making we decided to hitch a ride in her parent's car to 85 market! imagine!! 5 soon-not-to-be teenagers in the backseat! complete with sq sitting on ce, and the rest of us quite comfortably seated too. and our luggage in the boot. not long after we all received an sms from dear timothy telling us not to be late for sentosa the next day. haha, how thoughtful.

11+pm, zoom zoom. and we arrived at 85 market. timmy came to join us yay! poor ken's stuck in tekong..but we missed you! ce had her cheap and beloved bak chor mee, after 2 weeks of insanely-priced food in Israel, and sucky service too. but mindblowing memories and photos though! sq and i went thru her whole cam..looks like she really enjoyed herself! trip of a lifetime mannn. like, how many of us have acty seen or been to a desert sia. the guys had prawn noodle..and it's time to give sq her present! er..and cake. sq receives: Zhang Feng Qi's newest album, Wan Jun Biao Mei, with accompanying poster. and er..disgusting chocolate cheesecake from 7-11. this serves as a warning to all who see this product on display in the future! it is NOT worth burning your stomach with such petfeed-like stuff..just for convenience. here, a serious apology: Sorry Shuqin, to have ended your day on such a bad note. We really regretted it :/ was acty deciding if we shd have bought your cake on 24th or 25th, since we were so sure we'd meet on both days. finally decided on 25th cos ken would have a chance of booking out in time. but who'd have known that things would turn out that way, and we didn't meet for dinner on the 25th. really sorry!

12:15am, we left the hawker centre. ce back home to sleep, and yc, tim and sq took bus. that basically ended the day..

June 25th!
we met at harbourfront mrt! we as in yc, kiu, tim, sq and i (: made our way to the bus interchange where we met yizhen, joel and the rest of the group. after some explanation of rules by timothy the leader we're off to our destination in the cheerful orange bus!

when we arrived timmy continued his briefing abt the game and off we start! our group is well, just the four of us, and Yingli, NUS FASS Social Work Undergrad..cool fac rite. we had quite a hard time deciphering our clues, and what didn't quite help was that it started pouring! and we started getting shelter along with many kinds of tourists at the bus stops..and also in front of this Roti Mama sign, which we jokingly dismissed off as a extension of the Roti family, but little did we know that it's one of our treasure hunt stops! i think Yingli must be cringing so hard inside from trying to tell us how we're always oh-so-unlucky. cos we detoured so many bloody times, going pass our future stops and NOT finding what we're supposed to find..in the end we only completed 3 out of 6 stops, with Yingli and Timothy's help somemore! sigh.

but nvm! it was fun..taking all the free bus rides and beach train! i love the beach train! i love the wind in my face! hehe, also miss the stupid peacock which kept running away once it sees a cam phone. bloody hell. all in all, we were not exactly as enthusiastic as we shd be, i'm sure no one will refute this point..but erm..just credit it to our bad luck that day :/ oh! and i bumped into cockle at the beach! oops, sidetracked.

after meeting the rest of the grp at Subway where they had their lunch we kinda went our separate ways once we reached mainland..yea..and dinner was cancelled cos ken's not able to meet us, yc had to watch initial d, sq had to go home, tim had to go out and kiu and i went to ikea..

hmm, thereafter htg had a gathering on 30th june where they met at town and watched War of the Worlds. so sorry i can't join cos i was having farewell dinner with my colleagues..at Swensen's Tampines..

hokay..till the next outing..miss ya guys! (:

2005-06-24T09:48:00.000+08:00

heyz all..i'm officially into the last year of my teenage years le..hmm..feels kinda sad ah..cos starting next yr..i'm officially an adult..wahaha..but watever la..my last teen year just started..shd make good use of it instead of moaning about something that is 1 year away..btw what i really wanna say is..

Thank You HTG! =)

Thanks for all the birthday wishes..to Timothy, Jeremy and Yuanting..dunno if u all specially stayed up to wish me..but if u did..i'm really touched..thanks alot! To Kenny and Yaochen..Seeing ur msges on my way to work sure made the journey a happier 1..=)

hmmm..think i'm really a lucky and fortunate girl..got wonderful friends like HTG..and all the others i've made in my 19 years of living..u guys have helped to make the start of my 19th year a wonderful 1..and i will strive hard to make the rest of the year a happy 1. =D

Yeah..we are meeting to jie1 chaneng today..finally..after so long..we are going to see her again..wonder how is she now..got major changes not?

2005-06-22T22:30:00.000+08:00

okie..back here..to do what i am obliged to do? or shd i use de word..promised? since i once said in some entry that i will faithfully update the blog on all HTG outings..be it full attendance or not..hmm..tink there are quite alot of things to update..let's start with the easiest..updates on the NS status of Kenny and Yaochen..

1stly..Kenny is in SISPEC..wahaha..quite poor thing ah..kena assigned to a sch that is at the other end of Singapore when he lives at 1 end..luckily he is getting deferment for his medicine course..if not he wud have to suffer the long journey travels for another 3 months at least..on to Yaochen..he's in pilot course..wahz..quite amazing leh..it sounds so diff to get into the pilot course..but here we have..a future pilot..if everything goes smoothly for him..Jia You! we believe u can do it! =)

okie..done with that..Let's move on to lives of HTG in the last weekend..hmmm..we had a stayover at Kenny's hse again! wahaha..tink his house is turning into the official place for HTG stayover le..we had 2 stayovers so far..and both are at his place..is it a coincidence? dunno..but his hse is sure a good choice for stayover..hehe..=p
hmmm..in de 1st place..why did we have a stayover leh..it was supposed to be a bbq cum birthday celebration for YC..but becos YC had his own birthday chalet..and we found bbq too troublesome..everything was simplified till it became a stayover..hehe..see how lazy we are..too bad..this is just us..Bleah! =p

kkz..hmm..stayover started at 5pm..de time Kenny, Yc and Tim met at Boon Lay MRT/Jurong Point on 18 Jun..hehe..i was late..i reached only about 5.30pm..went to the arcade to meet the guys..we played photohunt..and they played some shooting game..dun remember the name le..juz know that we spent a super long time waiting for their chance..cos there was tis guy..who was stuck to the machine for so super long! he had so much life..and was so skilled..he knew when to fire and when to hide..if i'm not wrong..he played for ard 30 mins! can u imagine that..2 tokens..30 mins! if all arcade-goers are like him..arcades wud hav closed down..anyway..by the time they finished their game..already 6 plus close to 7 le i tink..and bcos i was hungry..so was YC..we decided to have dinner at JP..and wait for YT at the same time..we spent quite some time deciding where to go for dinner..before we decided to go to this new jap place "Bento Box"..haha..luckily YC had the craving for Jap food..if not dunno how long we have to decide..

hmmm..the food at "Bento Box" was not bad..quite nice..but the service abit cocked up i tink..cos we were given a seat that was reserved..then when we went to queue for food..the waiters and waitresses tried to change our place..den they saw this couple who was finishing their meals le..so told us to wait..cos their table was 1 meant for 4..but hor..dunno wat the couple was tinking..they juz sat there lor..den our food came..and we still had no table..we looked like idiots la..standing ard with bags..waiting for seats..luckily..someone left..and we finally got a seat..dinner was quite fast i tink..cos by de time we end..YT was already at Boon Lay le..we bought her takopachi..and YC bought his fav "ma chi" den we went to meet her..

took bus to the mini shopping centre near Kenny's hse..haha..went to rent VCD again..typical of us whenever we go Kenny's hse..we rented "The Eye 10", "Aliens VS Predators", "The Exorcist" and "X-Men 2"..according to YC..these are all very intense movies..after that proceeded to Kenny's hse lor..haha..i wanted to watch "The Eye 10" and they agreed..so that's wat we ended up watching that night..Pengz..the show was more of funny than scary la..but overall not bad..

after the movie ended..we left..for Partyworld at Clementi! haha..seems like quite long since we last sang..hmmm..i tink Partyworld is better..cos it is cheaper..sound system is better..there's titbits and drinks..and they dun limit the no. of songs u can dedicate! de moment we went..tink we chose all de possible songs for de night..den de rest of the time was spent singing..haha..quite funny..cos there were alot of Jay's and David Tao's song..all very high pitch 1..den poor Kenny and Yc seemed to have such a diff time singing..forgot de details of the night le..haha..except for de sudden Machi Didi that appeared..and the phonecall from Timothy...oh yah..1 thing bad about Partyworld..they countdown de time u have left! and shuts de system when the time is up..sigh..so we had to leave..punctually at 2am..took cab back..very extravagent hor..took cab down and back..but no choice..and acty on de way back..de guys already kinda knocked out le..

back in Kenny's hse..eh..they guys showered..and cooked instant noodles for supper..and tried watching X-Men 2..hehe..i din even try watching..i tink i fell asleep 5 mins after the show started..when i woke up again..it was 4 plus..and we all moved into the room for proper sleep..haha..quite funny..cos YC tried to squeeze with Kenny in 1 bed..den the 2 of them were persuading and dissuading each other..but YC still ended up sleeping on the floor..after Kenny gave 1 pillow to him..haha..oh yah! i was almost murdered by some yellow chair..but after all commotions..it was sweet dreamz.....

woke up quite a few times in the morn...but de final time was at 9 in de morn..when i heard the familiar "tong hua" ringtone..not once..quite a few time..and before we knew it..Kiu has charged thru all securities and ended up in Kenny's room..den it was time to get up..cos no more chance of peaceful sleep also..tink de person that suffered most was YC..haha..with all de harassment..after that..we washed up and went for Mac's breakfast..haha..it was already 10.30 when we left hse..

after lunch..back to Kenny's hse..cont our vcd marathon...finished "The Exorcist"..quite diff to understand wat the show is about..and i was half asleep..after "The Exorcist"..Kiu left..and we proceeded with "Aliens VS Predators"...much easier to understand show...and interesting..after we tried to make fun of the the storyline and characters...everything ended at ard 3+...when me,yt and yc left Kenny's hse..

yupz..that's about all i can recall about the stayover...and sorry for the sloppy summary towards the end..cos losing steam le...den wanna sleep le..hehe..hope those reading were not bored while reading..

btw..Chaneng is coming back in 2 days time! how i miss her..=) and i recieved some freaky msg juz now..frm her...but it was a sms frm 2 mths ago..wonder wat went wrong..dunno is it starhub or M1.

2005-06-16T16:02:00.000+08:00

Heyz..tell u wor..i was very happy yesterday night! Big big thanks to Yaochen, Kenny and Yuanting..=D we had a mini HTG stayover in YC's birthday chalet..i thoroughly enjoyed myself..Yippee!!! and even though it ended less than 12 hrs ago..i'm already starting to look forward to the next HTG stayover at Kenny's house this sat..but there’s this worry within me..what will my mum say when I ask her about the stayover..sigh..

Kkz..sad news aside..let me update on the stayover..=D
Hmmm..the chalet started on 14 June..and on that night, me, Kenny and Timothy went..din really spend much time in chalet that night..becos I arrived at Downtown East at only 8.30pm..and the 3 guys played X-Box in X-Square from 8.30pm to 9.30pm..haha..tell u wor..it was a funny experience at X-Square..there was sumthing wrong with the X-Box and after they found the solution to it..they realized that there is sumthing wrong with Player 2's controller..it juz seems like they were not fated to play la..tink they only played at most 45 mins..and spent the rest of the time trying to fix the problems that keep appearing..but I tink they enjoyed it..afterall..it was a soccer game they were playing..guys..agree? =p

We left for YC's chalet at 9.30pm..reached his chalet at ard 9.45pm..we went straight up to the room..and I tot it wud be cooler up there..oh no..i was wrong..the aircon juz doesn't seem to be working..and the room felt like a sauna..wahaha..all of us were perspiring inside la..anyway..we spent the time in chalet up in that room..talking..muz say I found out quite a lot of things that night..and to YC..thanks for your Panadol..it sure helped a lot! I had to go home that night..cos next day got to go work mah..and I was quite sure mama wun let me stay also..so..the guys being very nice pple..decided to send me home..we left at 12 midnight..hehe..i remember it so well cos I managed to wish YC "Happy Birthday" in person!

That's the update for the 1st night..wanna find out what the guys did after I left? Hehe..i also dunno..will have to depend on our luck..see whether they will update..next..let’s move on to June 15..Yaochen's Birthday!!!!!

Okie..i went to work as usual on June 15..felt weird..its like returning to work on a Monday..but it was already Wednesday..haiz..had to do abit of OT..so only managed to leave office at 6.45pm..was supposed to go help babysit my niece..but my sis decided that I dun need to in de end..so I rushed down to chalet..but still..by the time I reached..it was ard 7.45pm le..hehe..i kinda forced Kenny to come out to Downtown East to accompany me in..cos I knew it wud be super weird to go in alone..Nice Kenny came!haha..so we went..and along the way..Kenny told me about the big mess YC was in..hmmm..really wanted to go home..cos felt out of place la..but decided to go instead..afterall its YC's birthday..and I shd give face..and now I shall tell u proudly..i dun regret going in..=)

Eh..it was quite weird at 1st..it was like me and Cheryl were the only 2 19 years old girls there..the other pple there included YC's section mates from NS, his relatives and of cos his family..acty I was considered lucky..at least I had Kenny for company..eh..for the beginning part of the night..all we did was sit in the living room..eat dinner and watch tv..basically that was wat everyone was doing..after tv..it was cake cutting time..swensen's ice-cream cake! Cookies and Cream!haha..dun need me to say it out..u know it..Yummy!

After that..me and Kenny headed upstairs..and we stayed there for the rest of the night..we chatted..hehe..it was Kenny's turn to find out things..i tink I was really engrossed in the conversation..cos I din even notice wat time YC's relatives and section mates left..by the time I realized it was quiet downstairs..all were gone..and it was already 11+..wahaha..and by tis time..Yc's family has already came upstairs to begin packing to head home..funny things happened while we were all up there also..YC’s mum was telling us about how she was frightened by YC when he had high fever of 40 degrees Celsius and could not answer qns coherently..after which..Yc's family left..and it was down to only me, Kenny and Yaochen..and we ended up watching tv downstairs..cos we could not stand the heat..by now..yt was already on her way home from Genting and on her way down to chalet..=)

We watched "yu le bai fen bai" till 12.30am..u know wat..YC and xiao S has the same birthdate if i am not wrong..then we went out to fetch yuanting..=) and after which we headed to Cheers to replenish supply..we bought coffees and chocolate..then it was back to chalet again..with 4 pple..there was more things to do..for example..play cards! We played "Bluff"..and I lost in de end..then decided not to play "Bluff"..changed to playing Bridge..eh..we din last long with Bridge also..ended up playing with our camera phones..and poor Yc was the model of the night..and who was he imitating..Ju On..wahaha..show u guys the pic next time..and hear the sound too! It was really funny..made me laugh till stomachache..and kept me awake..haha..

Den after that we decided to shift upstairs..went up..and we continued with Bridge..eh..tink it was after 2 games..then Yuanting's phone batt went flat..so we all decided to go to bed..by that time..it was already 3.30am..*Yawnz*

I slept and woke up quite a few times early tis morning..couldn't sleep in peace..cos I was scared I wud oversleep..then I wud be late for work! Tink I woke up around 3 times within that 2 hours..and when I woke up again at 5.45am..decided that I shall not go back to sleep le..so acty I was awake in that room..with the other 3 HTG members asleep..din want to wake them up..so I could only wait for 6am..when it was finally 6am..yt's phone alarm rang..she woke up..and I got her to help me lock the door after I left..and then I headed home..tink I was too tired..to even go and tink if it wud be dangerous walking alone on the streets at that time..i finally reached home at 6.15am..after shower and packing..left for work..and here I am..in office..supposedly doing work..but hehe..here updating blog entries instead..

Oh yah..wanna thank yt..thanks for helping to lock the door! =)

Looking forward to Sat..kinda worried though..my mum seems kinda unhappy with me recently..with wat I also dunno..hopefully she will allow me to stayover on sat..see ya guys..i miss chaneng! Girl..are you enjoying urself now?

2005-06-13T00:14:00.000+08:00

okay..finally here to complete my entry. which of cos i'm very late. gg genting in afew hrs..ce gg israel..sq will be the only st left in singapore..miss ya guys k..muz take care of yourselves..

sigh, feel quite out of steam now. the kind of feeling that you get when the day's excitement dies down and we just quieten down suddenly..and stone and feel weird that such an abrupt change in emotions has occurred. or is it only me? but anyway, i feel quite sian now. for what and why i also dunno. i'm not supposed to feel sian. i'm supposed to pack and sleep early. but ya..was stoning while i packed. even getting down to pack took me awhile cos i was simply sian and just thought of doing nothing but sleep. this is totally weird.

i think some in htg still dunno what happened. but to those who do, i just wanna say it doesn't make a big difference acty. hai..sorry that i seemed like i was hiding it from you all all this time..but i really didn't know that he liked me, and you all knew..ya. hmm..really wasn't lying when i said there was nothing between us..cos i really thought it was that way. felt abit guilty when i found out..i dunno why also..just thought that somehow i'm in the wrong la..for being too blur perhaps..

not really blur la..just that i normally stop myself frm assuming or expecting things la..after experiencing its damaging effects. i kinda know what was happening but didn't wanna probe cos i thought it was probably nothing..ya..just some typical htg fooling around..so..sorry once agn..

not in the mood to type anything more la..ya..i realise i sound not ok agn..but i am..just tt i'm in the pre-sleep zhuang4 tai4..abit seh alr..dun wanna announce anything here oso la..somethings must be told personally..

nites everyone..
ken and yc, happy block leave..
st2, happy holidays/study trip..
st1, happy working..
kiu, happy training..
tim, happy slacking..
sweet dreams..

2005-06-13T00:13:00.000+08:00

hey heyz..its me again! hehe..quite surprising wor..there's acty something for me to blog this weekend..muz make it a quick 1..need to go sleep le..tml is monday..sigh!

Let me update on the meet-up we had on friday night..it was a surprising 1 wor..cos it was organised by timothy! haha..can't remember when he ever initiated a htg outing..was really shocked when i saw his msg..but glad at the same time too..=p anyway..back to the dinner..hmm..we met at cityhall mrt at 7.30pm..i was late for 5 mins..yc was late..for dunno how long..dun really remember le..kiu was amazing..he book out at 7.30 from CCK..but he reached earlier than yc..wahaha..it's juz so typical of kiu and yc..after which..the 5 of us headed for suntec..oh yah..btw..the 5 of us were..tim,ken,yc,kiu and me! haha..i was the only gal..along the way..it was typical NS talk for LTG..haha..NS men..can't escape from their NS life no matter where and what they are doing..everything will be related and linked to NS..bleahz! =p

we went pastamania for dinner..very sure now that i dun like creamy pasta..never ever managed to finish my pasta 1 leh..maybe if i ever eat pastamania again..i shd abstain from creamy pasta le....after dinner..hehe..i had ice-cream..i knoe wat weight conscious pple are thinking..fattening! haha..but its my indulgence once a week..not too much i tink..chose choc chip flavour..heard for the 1st time that it cannot be put on a cone..cos its too hard..and will drop out of the cone..tink i was really shocked..cos the counter gal looked so pissed..hmmm..conclusion..peanut caremel is still nicer..muahaha..

after buying ice-cream..we went to arcade..its no joke that yc was a member of air-rifle in sec sch and jc..his shooting skills and accuracy are really good! i was watching them play all the time..quite fun leh..not bad la..stand and watch..get entertainment without spending money..hehe..after arcade we went sky garden..oh my! how i miss that place..the place which holds all the pleasant memories of htg..to me..that has already become a htg gathering location le..we sat at the playground..was talking crap..mostly about NS..and i took photos of them..hehe..for my hp photo caller id..now if they call my hp..i will see their faces..=) hehe..not bad la..they all look quite nice..we sat there for quite long i tink..from 9+ to 11...hehe..laughed alot..really felt happy and comfortable that night..thanks guys!

hmmm..that's all for this entry ba..really got to go le..see ya guys soon! and dun worry..if there's an outing i'm present..there will be an update..even though it might not be that quick..tataz..take care pple! =D

2005-06-07T11:51:00.000+08:00

first and foremost..i must apologise for not posting for so long. sorry everyone!! though it's against my own belief that saying sorry is useless when the damage has been done, except when it is done unintentionally. ya, i can't exactly say it's unintentioned, since i do have free time before and after work, and on weekends. so the above words might just be a useless paragraph.

dunno what i shd blog abt though, since i kinda only have 15 minutes before i muz bathe and make my way to work. sigh, whatever i want to say cannot be so public anyway. the right time and place to say some things really does matter.

argh..i really have no time le..continue tonite k..tatas. st1! i hope i'm in time to let u catch this post when ya visit this site tdy! (:

2005-06-05T00:18:00.000+08:00

hmmm..its time of the week..for me to devote some time to this space..time to let pple who happen to pass by this blog..know what has been going on in HtG..and when i have something to blog..it means we had HtG outing..=)

oh gosh.."tong hua" on 933 again...sigh..i'm getting sick of this song..especially when it reminds me of pple that i wish i hav no wish to remember..wonder how much can i type within tis song..shall note the time it finishes..see how much hav i written..

okiez..by now..those who hav read this blog..will know that Kiu has POP from his SISPEC course..and is now posted to Signals..goodness know wat is that..NS life is too complicated for me to comprehend..and Tim has POP from his Medic course as well...hmmm..now 1 is in CCK..de other in Mandai..dunno why..seems like they are always posted to places far from their homes..NS out to "sua3" them ba..and Kenny gonna POP from BMTC on Wed..Yc on Tues..(tong hua juz ended..seems like my typing speed not very fast ah..now got "xiao fu qi"..the song very sweet wor!and if you are wondering who sang it..Ocean and Cai Chun Jia..yupz) Back to main topic..very fast hor..2 months has past..seems like the guys juz went into NS not long ago..time flies..wonder if it is good or bad..cos i also not sure if i want time to pass so fast..nvm..since i hav no control over the time..

kkz..updates on today dinner outing..hmmm..kiu,yt,kenny, kenny's bro, kiu's bro&mum...went expo for PC show if i am not wrong..i din go though..i met them for dinner only..seems like our location for dinner changed many times..our 1st location was TM..den changed to Changi Airport..then wanted to go YC hse to visit the poor guy..who was down with very serious upper throat infection..that led to high fever of 40 degrees..after calling him..we had to change location again..cos it was so serious..he ended up in Raffles Hospital!!!so we went Bugis..haha..tinking back on wat kiu said when we 1st entered the ward..saying he din look as serious as he imagined...1st thought that came to my mind...typical LTG..this is juz their way of showing concern for one another ah...nothing to say..=p oh..felt that we were quite intruding..cos Cheryl was there too..then we sort of invaded their "er ren shi jie"..so sorry YC and Cheryl..

eh..YC has to be put on drip lor..for his antibiotics..saw the IVF needle that is inserted into his hand...Ouch..quite scary..now i know y pple are scared to go forward for blood donation..cos the needle is really scary..now i really admire blood donors for their courage..and the pain dialysis patients need to go thru..oops..off track again..overally..although YC looks quite pale..he was still very cheerful la..his usual self..joking along with us..really very glad to know that he is feeling better already..

YC..Get Well Soon!!! =D

oh yah..we finally saw timothy today!!! quite long since we saw him leh..full LTG attendance today..tink it can be considered an achievement..since we are all so busy with our own things recently..and seeing the bunch of guys...joking and playing ard with each other..no matter how moody you feel..they never fail to make you laugh..long time since i laughed till stomachache le..tink de last time was at PS Gelare..anyway..we left at ard 8+..decided to go Bugis LJS for dinner..yum yum..long time since i ate LJS..kinda missed it..thanks peeps..for helping me to satisfy the craving for LJS..hehe..=p

after dinner..we decided to head for some shopping at Bugis Junction..we had a mission in mind..hehehe..dun tell you wat..cannot say..cannot leak out the secret before the day arrives..but i must say we completed the mission in a very short time tis time round..surprising even myself..maybe we really know each other much better now..=D after completing our mission..hehe..we headed for Gelato ice-cream..wahaha..my fav dessert..but dunno y..maybe cos lack the atmosphere that's always there when i eat ice-cream..dun hav the "Wooo..." feeling today..but still i enjoyed the ice-cream..though i hate the rum taste that rise up my throat everytime i burp..=(

overall..today dinner meet up was a pleasant 1..=) and we are planning for the next already..and already hav problems compromising the date..but i know we will succeed..

Take care pple..see ya! =)

2005-06-03T00:02:00.000+08:00

heyhey...just felt e lack of activity in e blog is too unbearable le ar...n since got leave today mite as well go n post le...

i'm now outta tekong le...posted to signals in stagmont camp choa chu kang...after which i will prob stay in cck la...sadly...but oh well...it's abt as comfy as ya can get for a combat post le...another 3 mths course...ya...to get my 3rd chevron...or stripe...n finally my rise in pay...oh ya...i pop le btw....haha...got my corporal rank le...but basically sergeants r treated like shit 1...on my pop day i still had to send my own arms...clean my own arms...do a last bunk inspection...arrrrghhh...evry1 was totally demoralised on how pop day can be so shitty...n cos we did our route march thru e nite...till 5am...we din sleep wat...so naturally sleepy rite...den evry1 dozed off during weapon cleaning...den evry1 got screwed upside down...walao...happy day la...y must like this? specialist's life...screwed up...

n i realised all e videos i took on my hp u all cannot c 1....cos it's nokia player format...den u all not nokia users...trying to convert it to some other video format...we shall wait n c how ba4...got pc fair now man...dunno should go n c not...n y seoul garden must be so ex!!! sigh...no matter how cheapest is like near 20 bucks la...

hmmmm...me posted to west...tim i dunno...ken to medicine...yc mayb to air force academy...haha...evry1 will be even busier le man...e reality of life...n i no i've not been trying as hard as i could to make things happen...oh well...just tot i should haf make sq believe this is not her private blog..haha....i posted k...thou nth much...wish myself luck in signals...till i blog again...may e force be with me...

2005-05-29T00:52:00.000+08:00

i'm pissed off..with a lousy DJ..who is supposedly very experienced...how could he juz butt in halfway thru the song?! when the singers were still singing...and it's not like the song was ending within 5 seconds...there was still a whole chunk of the chorus after the part where he butt in..it's not bcos i like that song...i juz find it very unprofessional lor...and its kinda disrespectful to the singers right?if you din like the song.....you could choose not to play it in the 1st place..and as a DJ..your preferences shd not affect the choice of songs that you play...i'm juz shocked..and pissed..at the way he did things...

anyway..that's not the point...wanted to blog about HTG events..but i had to express the displeasure i had..juz couldn't understand how can a professional DJ do that..to tink i kinda like his programmes...sigh..kz..back to wat i wanted to say...

let's start from last week's outing to Snow City and Kenny's house..firstly..i need to apologise..sorry Yuanting, Kiu and Kenny..so sorry for being late resulting in us having to take taxi down from Bedok to Boon Lay..din mean to be late..but i couldn't leave hse earlier..haiz..reasons that did not need to be made known..anyway..after some snacks at Macs..and delay..we finally got into the snow city..supposed to be an hour session..but tink we only spent like 1/2 hr inside..luckily..thanks to kiu..we managed to get the tickets at promotion price..if not it wud really had been quite a waste of money..the slope was the most fun part..too bad we only played twice..but i guess its better than none ba..and the snow fight..wahaha..dunno if real snow feels that way too..but i guess frenly fights are always fun..seeing pple dodge the snowballs thrown at them...oh yah..we also saw this small little boy while queuing up for the snow slide..he's so cute and brave...sitting there..all by himself..not afraid of anything...not crying..not making a scene..too bad i din take a pic of him..but i really admire him..for his courage..

okie...after Snow City..we went to Kenny's house..we rented "Ye3 Man2 Shi1 Jie3" too..Kenny's relatives went over too...his house was buzzing with activites even before we went..even more activites after we went..anyway..his mum is a great cook! she cooked up a feast that day...yum yum..it muz have been our lucky day..to get to savour her wonderful cooking...hehe..free and yummy dinner...=) thanks Kenny and Kenny's Mum! finally..i got to watch my long awaited "Ye3 Man2 Shi1 Jie3"...its a good show...the ending was really quite sad..for me...the part when the guy came back as a ghost...telling the gal to live on well...is more sad and touching than the part when he died...dunno bout the rest though...

today...hmm..or shd i say yest...28 May..stg(inclusive of kenny) and kiu met up at tamp..felt kinda bad...cos the meeting was kinda shortened becos of me...i wanted to watch star wars...and dragged yt along...as a result..we had to leave after dinner..so sorry pple...seem to making u pple compromise becos of me recently..thanksfor all your sacrifices yeah... i appreciate them...=) anyway..we went cafe cartel...hehe..wanted to list the food we ordered..but realise i dunno their names...sigh.lousy me..but the food were nice..especially nice in good companion..din eat my fav dessert today.though i wud have liked to...nvm la..there's always another chance..and its fattening ah..shd not eat so often also...after that went for movie with yt..

hmmm..read the review for the movie before i went..so i kinda knew wat to expect..in fact..i was acty expecting certain parts to happens..comments i heard for the movies were a mix of good and bad..i also dun really know wat i tink of it...i guess when you expect too much..satisfaction is reduced...that's wat i feel ba...not saying that it was not nice...juz that i tot it could have been better...but still..i dun regret watching...kinda guilty though..cos i dragged yt along to watch..when she was not very interested in it...and she had to take cab home...cos no more train...haiz..so sorry girl..and thanks alot..for watching with me..

okiez..done my summary for meet-ups in the past 2 weeks...haiz..kinda sad..seems like this is turning into my personal blog le...feels like giving up on it at times too..but juz feel the obligation to keep it going still..even if it is juz an entry every week.....

2005-05-21T10:30:00.000+08:00

Heyoz! Tell you all a good news on behalf of our dear HTG cum LTG cum STG member....

Kenny is accepted by NUS Medicine course le!!!!!!!!

so happy for him.. Yesh! Another one of us with the course of our choice..His hardwork paid off afterall! we gonna have a future doctor in HTG..and he promised to treat us for free..=D

hmmm..so long never blog here le..feel kinda guilty..shd never neglect this dear blog of ours..to me..this blog got significance 1 leh..and it's more than 1 yr old le..we muz cont to keep it alive! never let it die! haha.. i sound hyper..for wat reason..i dunno..anyway..come come..for somer eal updates on HTG recent activities..Here goes..

hmmm..we met once last week...on a sat..quite obvious will be weekend..since the guys are never available on weekdays..hmmm..me, yt and kiu went Bugis in the afternoon..bought my sling bag and yt bought clothes for her cousin..after that we went PS..met up with Kenny..and we had Pizza for dinner..Yum Yum! so long since i ate them...Splitzza + Hut's Platter + Coke + Soup..even as i tink of them now..gonna start drooling le..hehe..=p and after dinner...we went for ice-cream at Gelare....oh my..can't describe the heavenly feeling of enjoying nice ice-cream after a fulfilling meal...u pple gotta try it for yourself..and we stayed there to talk...everything under the sun..literally under the sun...cos my memory of the chat consist mainly of NS experiences given by the 2 guys..stayed till 11pm...oh yah..it was on that day..that i realised you can acty see lightning thru the ceiling of PS..hehe..me abit mountain tortoise..din know PS has a glass ceiling...*^-^*

anyway..overall..Sat was quite a nice experience..proved something..it's not the thing you do that makes a outing enjoyable..its the pple u spend it with...although external attributes such as nice food makes it even more memorable..

hmmm..wonder when will be our next meeting..supposedly today 1..arranged to watch "Star Wars"..but hor..all of us tink it is quite impossible to get tix..its only the 3rd dat after release..and today is a weekend leh..where got so easy..even if got tix..also 1st few rows..sigh..tink movie gotta wait le..dinner leh..maybe dun have..see how dear trotter replies..hehe..keep u updated again..

btw..

St2..Get well soon!

see ya! so long never see le..Miss ya!

2005-05-02T14:11:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Y r we alw making things difficult for ourselves in life.. true dat as we grow up, things become more complex.. this is a fact which we cant change.. there's realli no point sulking abt it.. y not conserve the energy to find out ways to improve such situations.. pple r alw regretting abt the choices they made.. yes they pay for the opportunity cost in economic terms but i believe they do gain things from the choice dat they make..

Simplicity is boring yes.. but it realli boils down to oneself.. for some, it is a stable kinda life while for others, it is a wasteful life.. we have to try to find ways to balance our lives.. we can sulk occasionally after which we haf to recover to our rational, practical and realistic self to solve the problem.. we r humans w feelings.. we cry, smile, laff, complain.. but den as we grow w more burden, we become more mature at the same time.. hence it is true to sae dat we have a greater capacity to solve problems..

of cos.. some problems r so big that we cant solve it ourselves.. those r problems dat will realli make us breakdown if we realli wanna handle on ourselves.. the onli way is to open up urself a bit.. true dat we often dun wanna bother other pple and oso fear that even if we open up pple dun even bother to listen so wad's the pt.. but den to avoid breakdowns.. we haf to find true friends.. parents and loving spouse to enlighten us.. thus at the end of the day, i alw think ur future spouse shud be someone who can lend a shoulder for u to cry on.. juz the company is enuf to let u noe that in such a complicated and difficult world.. there is hope..

we r individuals living in an interdependent world.. we cant be too independent or too dependent.. so the main problem for us ultimately is how we realli balance out ourselves.. since its not sth measureable for eg 50-50.. we will continue to spend time finding dat balance..

hmm juz a random tot.. type it out to share and oso read it myself to see whether it make sense or not..
meanwhile.. guys n gals.. continue to find ur balance ba.. booking in soon.. haha..

2005-05-02T12:39:00.000+08:00

is life complicated or simple? did we complicate things or were they complicated in the 1st place?

would you make sacrifices for a simple life? or wud u rather minimize sacrifices and lead a complicated life? y is it that sometimes we are not given the choice to choose the kind of life we wanna lead..the pple we wanna meet and the events that happen in our life? y does life gets more complicated as we age..if only we can always remain innocent..isn't that good?y complicate things..do pple find simplicity too boring? i feel otherwise..is it really true that we always have the choice? how much do others know of the misery we have to go thru when torn between choices..why does it seems like we are given choices for the wrong things..y does it seems like we can only make decisions for the small things in life..but big things in life are always decided beforehand..how many times are we given choices for the sake of demostrating democracy..

2005-04-25T13:18:00.000+08:00

"Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship - never."

"A friend is one who believes in you when you have ceased to believe in yourself."

"Never explain--your friends do not need it, and your enemies will not believe you anyway."
Thanks for always believing in me.. =)

"A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend, one human soul whom we can trust utterly, who knows the best and worst of us, and who loves us in spite of all our faults."

"With true friends...even water drunk together is sweet enough."
Hey guys..think of us when drinking Tekong water..=P

"A friend is someone who stays in when the rest of the world has gone out."

"A friend is someone who dances with you in the sunlight, and walks with you in the shadows."

"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."

"True friendship is like sound health, the value of it is seldom known until it be lost."
Pple take care wor..so that nothing will be lost..

"Of what shall a man be proud, if he is not proud of his friends."
That’s why I’m so proud to have you guys as friends. =D

"Our friends show us what we can do; our enemies teach us what we must do."

"There is no friend like an old friend who has shared our morning days, no greeting like his welcome, no homage like his praise."
So..we should have chalets and stayovers more often..so that we can share more morning days together!

"The difficulty is not so great to die for a friend, as to find a friend worth dying for."
I know that i will die with no regrets for i have come to know you guys..

At the shrine of friendship never say die, let the wine of friendship never run dry."

riendship is like money, easier made than kept."
i’m so glad we managed to keep our friendship going after 4 years..=D

2005-04-24T23:53:00.000+08:00

kenny! you really so scared of stg ar? haha. we are but only sotongs. we know not on purpose one la k..won't blame you one. in fact the revised plan had a better effect..rite, ppl? hehe..yup muz agree had a nice time ytd..listening to all the army talk. sounds so complicated but all guys seem to know it..so i guess it's just stuff that you'll just know when you're in it. like all the jargon we have at work too :D

i guess it's not that we choose to slog at work la. but that really is your job ma. like it or not, it's that volume. die oso muz clear wad..otherwise quit lo. which might not work in some cases cos of contract, ya. so not really within our control.

i stopped here last night. cos i was TOO TIRED. date and time now is 250405, 11:14pm.

of cos, i still am tired now. so i can't recall what i wanted to say. well, some things are better left unsaid, as recommended by LTG!

nice post by sq! though i've most definitely read it somewhere in my emails or sthg. still, never fails to erm..lose its meaningfulness everytime.

argh! i'm not making sense. nites world!

2005-04-24T19:06:00.000+08:00

heyheyhey.. still have to apologise abt yest la.. realli blur leh me.. tho i wud say yest i was qt stressed up trying to prepare all my medicine documents.. den i was planning my personal statement when i leak out the secret to q.. haiz mebbe there's still no reason for mi to disclose it unintentionally huh.. heng ah.. nuttin went wrong.. u noe ah.. i was v scared when sq told mi dat i have disclosed the secret.. i was stunned and so scared the sts will scold mi leh.. suddenly saw a familiar figure on the train.. it was chan eng.. i was really realli shocked.. a v weird experience yest la in summary..

Anw, i also enjoyed yest a lot.. the 2 weeks of confinement certainly changed many of my perceptions.. n thanks guys for yest tho i am not the bdae boy i certainly enjoyed as much as him.. Bro! happie bdae!! muz do ur best in sispec and pass out as a sergeant den i can look up to u le.. back to the perceptions.. hmm there is simply too many things dat i took for granted in spore.. shalt elaborate.. but its like i start to cherish many of the different things i see on the road now.. similarly the pple ard mi.. nv have i missed everyone so much.. tho i dint realli wanna sae this out in words.. i realli see HTG sticking together for as long as possible.. i mean even tho in ns and working for many of us.. we r able a organise a full HTG outing.. well done!!

okay, acty ns wasnt bad.. i was feeling abit sad when i took the oath.. but the 17 days confinement was fast.. everyday was a hectic day and u realli haf nuttin to think abt.. slp so soundly at nite tho i was alw reluctant to wake up.. life is simple inside.. no wonder pple sae u become stupid in ns.. juz look at how i screw up the outing yest u will noe la.. haha.. n my falcon coy i not v hiong i think.. mebbe its still the 2 wks.. hu noes when i book in tml.. hell will break loose.. but agn wad can they do besides pumping mi and make mi sign extra guard duties.. i am prep for all these.. come on! hahaha.. do i sound overly optimistic? hmm my bunk mates sae i became slimmer and i realli do feel lighter aft all the runs.. more muscles tho my number push ups kept decreasing.. n oso definitely darker.. hahaha.. okay enuf abt army.. promised myself not to tok too much abt ns but i realli failed in the end..

so, i guess u gals r realli stressed up in work.. wondering how come u all r slogging so hard in work when u all dun even haf the responsibilty to feed ur families.. juz for the pocket money and the passing of time.. juz treat all these as a valuable experience b4 u all enter Uni lo.. i alw believe everyone do things w a reason and oso things happen for a reason.. there will alw be some lessons learnt that will serve to help u all the future.. we will complain, we will sulk, and we will cry but at the end of the day.. we grow up aft every experience.. in the future we will become stronger and we will handle things w more confidence and poise.. its all abt how the things dat happened will shape u as the person.. the mature adul that u will see in the future.. let us continue to work hard together and wateva obstacles we faced wud not be able to knock us down.. but instead make us stronger..

hmmm, went for my medicine pyschometric test and essay writing.. the essay's title was "students nowadays are so focused on getting into medicine that they missed out on the personal attributes that can sustain them in a medical career. Disucus with specific examples." I totally agree w the statement but i was so stunned by it that i wasted 10 mins out of the 45 given.. hmm so it was crap by mi lo.. realli hope they understand mi.. haha.. he pyschometric test is one that show ur character to them lo.. there r realli alot of cuckoo qn.. n there r 90 of them la.. wa i realli feel that all the personal side of mi has been revealed le.. but the weird thing is for mi.. for some qns i put down the more introvert side of mi and for others i put the extrovert side of mi.. hmm seems lik i still dun noe myself well huh.. this is bad... nxt step is interviews.. i think i ve to go read up le.. lik no time le.. n my interviews r during field camp.. meaning i will stay in the forest den halfway there will be truck to send mi to the ferry terminal to go for interview and den aft that go back to the forest agn.. realli dunnoe how to handle the interviews when i am so shagged.. nvm shalt worry now..

wa long post sia.. anw hope to meet u all nxt week.. long weekend huh.. hehheh.. but yc got prob coming out le.. meantime take care!! Luv ya all lots =)

2005-04-24T00:22:00.000+08:00

*yawnz*

hehe...sorry..can't help it..it is already past midnight..juz a sub-conscious behaviour..on a normal weekday..i would most prob be in bed le..sleeping soundly like a pig..not so tonight..cos it's a saturday night..and it's Kiu's birthday! i have to say this..tink our surprise party for him was really quite a success..unless he was bluffing me to make me feel happy..

the whole plan was changed at least 3 times i tink..dun worry Kenny..not going to blame you for leaking out the meeting place..cos everything went smoothly in the end..no worries..no need to feel guilty kz..it's alright..=) was tinking bout whether to explain our plan here..but realised it is too complicated to be put down into words..so its alright..anyone reading this..juz need to get tis fact..we succeeded! =D

meeting up with you guys really make me realised how much i miss HTG outings..miss the fun of pure messing around..lazing around..doing nothing but talk crap..reminds me of the days when we mugged together for Prelims and A levels..looking back..it seems so far away! we can't even remember when was the last time we were troubled over tests..and we have already recieved letters from uni for admissions..time flies..sighz..

saw YC and Kenny botak for the 1st time tonight..heyz..its not that bad la..they acty look quite good..and i'm surprised YC acty dun wear cap..but then again..it's not a must to..it's an option..guess Kiu and YC belong to the same category who see no need in wearing the cap..while Kenny and Timothy belongs to the group..who will wear a cap when they go out during their weekend book out..no matter wat..juz wanna let you guys knoe..it doesn't matter whether you wear a cap..you will still be you..looking great in your own ways..yeah? =)

Yuanting is havin a real bad cough wor..acty not only her..YC, Kenny and Kiu are also heard coughing while we were at Kiu's hse juz now..Tekong cough..something all NS men can't escape from..take care wor...we muz remain healthy to achieve the things we want in life..without health..dreams will only remain as dreams..cos we wun have the energy to fulfil them..drink more water everyone..dun fall victim to the viruses out there..

hmmm..running out of inspirations for things to say le..shall stop here..if not wat you read on will juz be crap from me again..once again..wanna say..Happy (belated) birthday! stay happy everyone!

2005-04-22T13:05:00.000+08:00

heyoz pple! i'm hyper today..happy happy day! =D seems like a long time since i felt so happy..and it feels real..doesn't feel like that kinda of happiness that will fade away as the day goes by..praying and hoping hard that everything will go smoothly at work today..that no shipments will go wrong and me able to go home on time without worries about cargo not being ready..hehe..realised i always talk using terms from work..not sure if you guys understand my crap at times..but it doesn't really matter..everyone's job different in their own ways..

hmmm..have the urge to write about birthday celebrations here..shd be safe la hor? dun tink the person will get to read the post before we hav the surprise for him..we are supposed to reach his hse before he does lor..feels excited about it..cos it is the 1st time i am planning a birthday surprise for someone wor..hopes it turns out to be a success..but now..the most crucial qn is..will the birthday boy appear in Singapore tomolo?!?! hopefully he is not that stubborn and silly as to wanna spend the last few hours of his birthday in Tekong alone..hehe..wonder if he will scold me behind my back for saying all this bout him when he really does read this..too bad!

finally..HTG gonna meet again! but then again..it's dependent on *ahem*..if he refuses to come out..all plans will be spoilt..and we'll all be so sad..not easy coordinating a meetup wor..especially when the gals are busy at work and the guys busy in NS..appreciate our efforts kz..gonna see Kenny and Yaochen with super short hair..hehe..wonder how will they look like..i gonna take a photo when we meet! A photo with 4 botak LTG members..hehe..i'm evil! =p

oh yah..by now..most of you shd hav known..i'm accepted by NTU business school le! recieved letter from them le! so so so happy! yippee! at least my future looks more certain now..time to start looking for bank loans to finance my studies..sigh..troublesome leh..hmmm..yuanting went for her Mass Comm interview yesterday..let's wait for good news from her..till then..see ya guys and gals on Sat! =) (hopefully..gotta make sure that guy gets himself out of Tekong tomolo night)

2005-04-11T22:20:00.000+08:00

hey ppl..seems like everyone's so busy and stressed..isn't it? :(

work's never good..sometimes i also wonder why i'm willing to shou4 qi4 just for a miserable sum of money..not like i will die without it. also tried putting myself in my surveyees' shoes..and i seriously dun find anything wrong with spending a few minutes answering a few questions or directly rejecting it if they're really not interested. they think that we're out to bug them or something. come on la, this is singapore. you know you have the freedom to reject a small survey, surely? most of them sound like i owe them money la. hey i'm working also, if you have the consideration to think. how you expect me to know what big things you're having at that moment? who knows, if we do know you're busy or free at that moment, you'll sue us on account of infringing privacy or divulging confidential information. sheesh! stupid singaporeans.

realised all my proper jobs revolve around singaporeans and govt. sigh. what a misfortune. i just hate the mindset of the older generation la. grumpy, can't be bothered, don't think further. like, hello we're trying to improve our service here! and you're complaining?! how hard to please are they? the younger generation are very obviously different. got one guy acty joked just to help me destress. so sweet right. ya but that's just a rare side of the job. most of the time express stress right after i end the call. acty everyone does. how bad can that be la.

wow is this an afterwork destressing station? i won't mind if it's the case acty. everyone's stressed! arghh..

2005-04-10T00:26:00.000+08:00

the time has come wor..now even Kenny and Yaochen are in NS le..time passed rather fast...and i'm feeling rather bad...too busy during the past 3 weeks..din even get to see them before they shave botak..and seems like i missed out on the fun of painting Chaneng's room...Argh..really "pek cek" these 3 weeks...work juz keep on piling...never seems to be able to clear..no matter how hard i try and the many OT i have done...really could not take it yest..cried in office le...cos it was after work...yet pple were calling to tell me that things have gone wrong...but it was not my responsibility! i did my job...i finished arranging what i had to before the cut-off time...it was the factory and sales pple that made mistakes..yet i was always the one clearing up the mess..tried very hard to control my emotions le..but the tears still flowed...Argh..hated the me at that time...y did i have to let my colleagues see me break down..but i gotta admit...i did feel much better after crying it out...din know i was so stressed out by work these few weeks...guessed it got me so "pek cek" cos i felt that i was not obliged to sacrifice so much for work...tink i yearned too much for my freedom..now i dread monday...

okie..maybe i shd not even complain? cos my workload is not considered the most heavy among my colleagues...and according to my colleague...being there for 3 months plus..i shd be able to handle this workload with ease...and looking at how my "shifu" managed to cope with a workload 5 times mine....there's nothing i shd complain about...but i hate this feeling! i hate this feeling of having everything dumped on me...forcing me to grow up when i'm so not ready and unwilling! 3+ months there..and u pple call me senior in the dept.....it was not by my choice! i could have remained the 2nd youngest..if only the others had not left..there's so much changes within the past 3 mths! i had to adapt...pple left pple came...and i had to guide and help others when i myself was still not settled...and even more pple are leaving now...another 2 this month...wat's wrong?! i dunno..now i'm waiting...for wed to come...if my colleague still dun come back from her leave..i dunno if i can still hang on....

sorry pple...juz had to vent the frustrations i had in me...i tot i had it all in control..but when i see documents piling in my in tray waiting for me to clear..mailbox exploding each day..table covered in a mess of papers at the end of a day's work..so much work undone..it juz gets discouraging..i'm trying! but i still can't do it to the best..argh! remain positive..kiu told me that in chat juz now...i'm trying...if not i wud hav broke down even earlier...i'm losing my patience...i want back my freedom! i want my time to spend it with you guys and my family! it's such a miserable feeling..having to wake up so sleepy..reach home so late...hav dinner alone when the dishes are already cold..miss the tv shows..when its all cos you have to finish other's pple work...

sigh...thanks guys..if you guys has read till here..i'm sorry for making you read thru 3 paragraphs of non-stop complaints...i know la...i have to accept what comes my way...can't escape..work has to be done..if not they will juz keep piling up..all i ask for is some time for me to take a breathe..not push me so hard..haiz...nvm...i'll strive on...after all..it's supposedly another 2 more days only...

suddenly had this tot today...we should all accept who we are and who others are for being their true self..no use forcing them to change for ur sake...and we shd not change juz cos pple expect us to be another person...if they can't accept us for who we are..then be it..there shd be lots more pple out there who are willing to accept us for the way we are..and the same theory applies to the way we treat others...if you dun want to be forced to change..then dun force others to change for your sake! hmmm...i admit..i'm still a failure in the latter..maybe i'm half a perfectionist? i have high expectations of pple...and i expect them to meet these criteria of mine..i want frens to be truthful to be about things..when i can't tell them the whole truth at times...i get pissed off...when i feel that they are hiding things from me...not that i dunno everyone got their own privacy and secrets..but aiya...i juz demand that of pple lor...i'm guilty as charged..but already trying to change this tinking of mine le..so sorry pple..will control my temper in future kz...will try to be even more understanding than now...

pple say i'm too nice at times...but to me..it's no harm wat..if it doesn't cost me anything...and it will help to bring a little happiness to others...i'm most willing to help...dun deny also..sometimes i end up getting myself into trouble..abit of "zi zuo zi shou" lor...wat to do...wat to say...once tot of giving up..stop volunteering to help...but realised it's sometimes harder to reject pple in need than to solve the problems that arise due to my own "helpfulness"...dunno la..y are we faced with so much choices?! i know my own weaknesses ah..being too soft-hearted is one big 1...that's y its so hard to reject pple who need help? that's y if you apologise...i'll pretend nothing happen and still remains frens with you? not that i'm not afraid of getting hurt once more...told you i'm stupid...always get myself into trouble only...not that kind that will avoid the same situation at all course after being hurt once...sometimes more than once le...still willing to try again...stupid right? kinda hate tis me at times...wonder if i got double character(dunno how to spell that cheem word)....cos there's always the internal struggle..between letting myself be hurt once more and building that wall ard myself...sometimes even i myself get confused..dunno wat i really want...

my colleague asked me once...wat's my new year resolution for 2005...i was stunned...cos i dunno of any..the one i had before release of results was obviously to score well and be able to get into uni..then now..wat shd it be? seems so aimless leh...haiz...but i know wat i want in my bf next time...after looking at so many lucky couples from workplace..i told myself..i want a guy who teng2 me more than i love him...my fren says i'm impractical...where to find such a guy in this age...but i believe...there will be such a guy out there? hopefully i'm not silly having an impractical dream here...

haha..talked lotsa crap hor..somehow the above juz came to my mind lor..then i juz wrote them down..nothing in particular..but i dun deny it's all tots triggered by things that happened to me...still find growing up a torture..life is so contradicting in itself...sigh...lastly..to all LTG members...we know NS life is tough...hang on kz! looking forward to seeing you guys and gals soon...=)

2005-04-09T19:51:00.000+08:00

yo guys! my previous entry was incinerated cos my com crashed. now i'm back 6 hrs later.. hopefully it dun crash this time..

been relief teaching at ajc this past week. yes u heard me rite. Anderson Junior College. got this job thru a recommendation of a classmate, and cos he doesnt wan another classmate to find out that he recommended me instead of her i was told not to blog abt it. dumb rite? so most prob my own blog wun be updated for eons.. but anw, back to ajc. so what am i teaching? Chemistry. A level Chemistry. and i found out that in order to be able to teach well, u must have an intimate grasp of your concepts. i'm starting to think that perhaps i shdnt haf deserved that A for my chem.. haha. and cos im relieving a teacher on her maternity leave, which means i'm taking over all her duties; i'm also a form teacher, or wad they call PD tutor. (dun ask me what pd means, i also dunno.) things were relatively mundane at the beginning, but then things started gg haywire when i started to teach...

ok let's see. shall share wif u all a profoundly embarassing incident that happened last fri. i walked into class preparing to give an overview for rxn kinetics. and i started to show them the graphs they need to know for all e various whatever order rxns.. and u know wad?! i drew the rate vs [A] graph for 2nd order rxn wrongly!! to tim n yt, it basically means i screwed up big time. furthermore at that point the bell rang and i had to let them off for their next class le. whuich means that entire class will be spending their weekend thinking :"damn i haf a sucky relief teacher for chem who's gonna be here till the end of e term and i'm gonna fail my common test man.." i foresee myself already bein condemned to the "relief teachers who cant teach" category..

actually, i was extremely flustered during that lesson.. why? cos during the chem lecture b4 that, one of my students from my form class had 'fits' and was brot to e sickbay. so being the form teacher i had to be there to take charge of things. thankfully there were other teachers ard to guide me or else i wld haf been at a loss. this guy basically lost control of his muscles and so was trembling all over and his fists was clenched. but he could still manage to talk.. and he demanded that we dun call his parents cos he didnt wanna let them worry. but the admin person went to call his mum anyway and she came down to bring him home. i did manage to talk to him personally.. and guess wat? he said that this problem aint physical.. and he started to share abt how he dun fit in w e rest, and feel rejected and unappreciated by his classmates etc etc. and so the more he thot abt this(during the lecture), the more agitated he became, and that translated into the outward expression of 'fits'. acty it wasnt really fits cos this wasnt life threatening and he was conscious, but it was rather scary anyway. i told the mum abt it and persuaded her to bring him to the doc, even tho he kept insisting that he was alright.. den from their conversation i could guess that the father is a drinker and usually treats the son rather harshly when he gets drunk, but i didnt hear any mention of physical abuse so that's a relief in a sense.

sigh. i had to grow up rather quickly in a space of a few hours.. i wonder if the mother realises i'm only 18.. yah so basically i wasnt able to teach after that incident, and i really felt that e class had wasted their time trying to understand me, and i feel so bad abt it.. dunno if im able to regain their respect again.. and its really sad bcos my 1st lesson wif them started on a high note.. i liked them and they liked me and they paid attention during the lesson (which was basic chem bonding) so i tot this class was e best out of the e 3. oh yah btw e classes i'm teaching are 11/05, 22/05 and 28/05. 11 is my form class and and 22 is the one i screwed up my lesson wif.. and i gotta teach them till end of may sia.. extended one more month cos the teacher is extending her leave.. wonder how my students will react to that piece of news. sheesh.

sorry i spammed so much here.. cant talk abt this on my own blog... argh. okok change topic.. ill stop whining now. ken n yc went over the sea to their island paradise last week. haha. hope they're doin well in there.. once their confinement over we must go out ok?! haha... and stg will try to stage an overnite in the meantime. i've got my own (very yellow) room now yay! my bro is banished to the outskirts of singapore (acty no lar he's staying in e dining room now) so i've got much more breathing space now phew. oh yea many thanks to ken who slogged so hard to help me paint my room. and also to yt who helped clean up. it was rather fun tho.. ken was saying if possible next time shd get the whole htg to paint a room. den i said it wld take one whole day to finish it cos mayhem wld break out. haha.. but seriously i dun mind doin it agn.. who wants to paint their room?? hahaha..

wah siao this is a very long entry. haha ok la shall stop here.. hope to meet up wif u guys soon eh? meanwhile take care every one!!

2005-04-02T23:45:00.000+08:00

hmmm..tink i'm weird..blogging 2 entries within the same day.....but this entry is triggered by wat i saw on my fren's blog..

sometimes really dunno wat is it that we as human wants...y does it seems like we never learn to cherish wat we hav until we lose it? is it really that diff to show others wat is it that we really want?deep down inside..we know we dun wanna lose wat we hav...but our behaviours always speak otherwise...we forget that wat we dun like..others probably dun like it too...

couples in love...yearn for each other when they are apart..but why is it that they can't be happy when together? y is it that sometimes when we hav already given in....we still can't get the minimum we ask for?understanding and trust...the basic building blocks in a relationship...seems like some couples are still lacking in them..juz wanna tell all couples out there..if u really treasure each other..dun be stingy with courtesy words such as "sorry" and "thank you"...nothing shd be taken for granted...the same applies to pple...fate brought u pple together..dun let it go to waste..

sometimes...life is juz so unfair...things are lost even when you try ur best to protect them......

2005-04-02T23:02:00.000+08:00

heyz! 2 weeks never see you guys le! time is running out..yaochen and kenny going army le..aiyo..1st time i hear from a guy that he is excited and looking forward to enlistment..kenny..u are 1 unique fellow..had such a busy week..been missing the 9pm show for 4 weekday nights...working OT for 3 of the nights...den went to buy my niece's present with my sis on thurs...today is my niece's birthday wor! had a great time seeing the innocent children play...if only we could turn back time...

hmmm..wonder if i will be able to find some time next week before de remaining 2 LTG members go to army...was tinking of asking you guys out for dinner one of the weekdays next week..but hor..need to see my schedule also..work now is so unpredictable..may need to OT at the last minute..was tinking of asking you pple out on either tues or wed..anyone interested in watching "The Eye 10" with me? please?!? i heard that it's worth watching..both a comedy and horror movie..STG???if u all dun mind..i was tinking watch at Princess..cheap cheap..

eh..some times..juz has the tots running thru my head..had some juz now..wanted to write them down in the blog..now hor..abit forgotten le..think some of them was triggered when i entered the blog and saw the neoprints..reminded of the happy times we had together..when everything was still in place..hmmm..really miss those days..de one good thing bout photos..they capture the moment of happiness...something that cannot be reproduce no matter how we try...

sometimes it works the opposite way...the harder you try at times...the more things won't go your way..that's y they always say the harder you try to forget..the more the memories will stay to haunt you...sometimes.....juz leaving the memories at the back of the head might result in fading of these memories instead..wonder if we really want to forget at times...good or bad...it was something we lived thru...so contradicting!

2005-03-29T22:10:00.000+08:00

So Looooong since i blog le.. =P hehe.. suddenly got the urge to write sth here...

Hmmm.. seems lik i am acty enjoying my days without work.. Initially I felt v sianz la.. I mean two mths of call answering and being scolded, joking ard w aunties, listening to calls and searching my database, u r bound to feel the tinge of 'job withdrawal' effect (dunnoe whether got this term not, but u all noe wad i mean la hehheh).. But I have since know how to make full use of my days, learning how to be bz and yet experience the peaceful and laid back lifestyle..

Okie, nowadays, top of my agenda would be to go and run ard my condo two rounds and do adequate amts of sit-ups and push-ups lo.. To prep myself la.. Den I will play my com (my football manager lo wad else), chat on msn, read blogs, read books ( now reading 7habits of highly effective people and The Teenage Investor.. Dun look at mi liddat hahah), watch tv, play w my baby cousin, go visit my ah ma ah gong ah yi jiu jiu, go out w mom, go out w frens..........

Hmm, acty i realli llok forward to gg to ns.. wanna go thru the two wks of confinement, 9wks of bmt and see where am I transferred to (tho I realli wanna defer due to my medicine course but biz/acct is still okay w mi la). There's this feeling of anticipation burning inside me to go in lo.. Mebbe I will like the new lease of life.. who noes..

Hey u gals out there.. Muz still go out as STG even tho LTG all in NS le.. haha.. all botak le -_-.. okie I think U all will be bz at work too.. But muz enjoy urselves and noe when to play and work.. Den when Uni comes.. all the best! I noe u all will do well de.. Make new frens and enjoy urselves.. Jia U wor ^_^

2005-03-25T12:31:00.000+08:00

heyz.. its good friday today! is it really a good day for all of us? realised timothy and chaneng will never be free today..was still wondering how come they are not online..hehe..okok..i'm lag..can't blame me..i'm a sotong...remember?!

1stly..congrats to yuanting on her new job..u really find a job fast leh...dun worry so much...i have more faith in NTUC than starhub..dun tink they will retrench pple like starhub...working in tampines leh..kinda envious..hehe..

yest..had farewell dinner for my colleague again..haiz..that's like the 8th colleague i'm sending off since i started working in the company since 17th Dec last year...seeing the frens ard you leaving one by one...the feeling really sux...wonder if the feeling of leaving sux as much...guess i'll know soon...when my contract is up...but by then..maybe the feeling of "yi yi bu she" wun be as strong le..i mean if all the frens you made in the company have already left before you...who's there for you to miss ah...btw...another of my colleague tendered her resignation letter yest..so i'll be sending another 1 off next month.haiz...

very fast wor..already nearing the end of march le..when april comes..it's yc and ken's turn to be enlisted...how are you guys feeling? excited? sianz? then kiu and tim already in unit le issit? i dun really know about the NS system..sounds so complicated..sounds like there's neverending training camp...one after another...anyway..juz wanna wish you guys all the best in NS wor..jia you jia you! u all will survive it 1....

and hor..i wanna say sorry leh...realised my attitude towards you guys has been really terrible recently..i know it myself...but somehow..i just lose control of my own emotions during the past 2 weeks...sorry for the "hu leng hu re" attitude towards you guys..i was kinda unreasonable during outings during the past 2 weeks...thanks for tolerating with me..u guys are really great frens diff to come by...=) i also trying to find out why my temper so bad recently..eh..when i'm quiet..i'm not angry leh...i'm juz sianz and dun feel like doing anything..so hor..no need to say sorry to me 1...

hmmm..hope we will be able to have a full HTG outing soon...but abit impossible leh..cos the guys are either in camp le or going into camp...hmmm...let's juz try...

2005-03-17T14:29:00.000+08:00

hmmm...finally forced myself to blog...haha..not that i dun wanna blog...just lazy...to do anything at all..haha...finally finished writing out the last day of bmt in my diary...hmmm...wat shall i name e diary leh? "those were the days"? haha...but ns life has barely started....tomolo posting results le....sianzz...getting e book in blues again....pray super hard dun hafta go back tekong ar...hmmm....ns things aside...been a nice break i guess this block leave...but it makes the whole idea of going back to civilian life seem like an illusion...hmm...din put in a v understandable way but u guys get e pt...htg blog reached 1 yr old le...evry1's been busy with work...n uni stuff....n e past wk has made me realised how come while in bmt u guys din meet up regularly...it's a challenge to maintain e large social circle evry1 has...and at e same time meet with the demands of life...guess prioritising has neva been a more integral part of our lifes den it is now...it really seems impossible to lead a simple life le...

in the past wk...many of the friends around me have been hurt by some1 ard them....angel aside who seems so blissful now...hehe...happy for her...best friends turning against them...not to mention e usual bgr incidents...which made me realise smt...all of us haf many many friends and close ones ard us...but in our minds or hearts there is always some1 who stands out from the rest as the one u find solace in n turn to when in need...or share ur happiness with...that 1 special person at that point in time...be it a friend...ur other half...mayb even ur parents or relative...which makes me ponder...is it betta to haf many many not so close ones for ya to turn to...or one person whom u place all ur trust n faith on? smt like whether u should put all ur eggs into 1 basket? cos when one day if one person were to not be there for ya anymore...u won't feel the hurt as deeply...n there r still others ard....yet it seems when there is that special some1...u get more comfort den in seeing all the others put tgt....moreover...when we feel we've been hurt...ain't it all due to expectations? e expectations mite be low...mite be easily achieved...but still...time n effort has to be put it no matter how easily they r to be achieved...and evrything bit by bit accumulated becomes one big erm...burden?? on the other party...sometimes these expectations dun even go with the reality of life...guess that's y religion exists...u dun haf any expectations towards the religion to which u r devoted to...n even if u do...when they aren't met u accept the whole thing as "there must be a reason why it din happen"...no1 to blame...no1 turning against u...no feelings hurt...shall just stop here...once again just all my spontaneous tots...but at least this time not too long n draggy..haha.....

3 more days to booking in...1yr 7mths to go...uni in 4mths...n life goes on....

2005-03-17T14:26:00.001+08:00

hmmm...finally forced myself to blog...haha..not that i dun wanna blog...just lazy...to do anything at all...plus com keeps screwing up...haha...finally finished writing out the last day of bmt in my diary...hmmm...wat shall i name e diary leh? "those were the days"? haha...but ns life has barely started....tomolo posting results le....sianzz...getting e book in blues again....pray super hard dun hafta go back tekong ar...hmmm....ns things aside...been a nice break i guess this block leave...but it makes the whole idea of going back to civilian life seem like an illusion...hmm...din put in a v understandable way but u guys get e pt...htg blog reached 1 yr old le...evry1's been busy with work...n uni stuff....n e past wk has made me realised how come while in bmt u guys din meet up regularly...it's a challenge to maintain e large social circle evry1 has...and at e same time meet with the demands of life...guess prioritising has neva been a more integral part of our lifes den it is now...it really seems impossible to lead a simple life le...

in the past wk...many of the friends around me have been hurt by some1 ard them....angel aside who seems so blissful now...hehe...happy for her...best friends turning against them...not to mention e usual bgr incidents...which made me realise smt...all of us haf many many friends and close ones ard us...but in our minds or hearts there is always some1 who stands out from the rest as the one u find solace in n turn to when in need...or share ur happiness with...that 1 special person at that point in time...be it a friend...ur other half...mayb even ur parents or relative...which makes me ponder...is it betta to haf many many not so close ones for ya to turn to...or one person whom u place all ur trust n faith on? smt like whether u should put all ur eggs into 1 basket? cos when one day if one person were to not be there for ya anymore...u won't feel the hurt as deeply...n there r still others ard....yet it seems when there is that special some1...u get more comfort den in seeing all the others put tgt....moreover...when we feel we've been hurt...ain't it all due to expectations? e expectations mite be low...mite be easily achieved...but still...time n effort has to be put it no matter how easily they r to be achieved...and evrything bit by bit accumulated becomes one big erm...burden?? on the other party...sometimes these expectations dun even go with the reality of life...guess that's y religion exists...u dun haf any expectations towards the religion to which u r devoted to...n even if u do...when they aren't met u accept the whole thing as "there must be a reason why it din happen"...no1 to blame...no1 turning against u...no feelings hurt...shall just stop here...once again just all my spontaneous tots...but at least this time not too long n draggy..haha.....

3 more days to booking in...1yr 7mths to go...uni in 4mths...n life goes on....

2005-03-17T14:26:00.000+08:00

2005-03-14T16:51:00.000+08:00

ehz pple! haha..changed beginning le..means got new entry le! means u guys and gals can cont to read on beyond the 1st sentence le! alamak u pple..nobody has anything to say about their life since my last entry? everyone having such uneventful lifes? or do we just feel that there is no need to share tots anymore?

anyway..tis is an entry from office..ard 10 mins before i knock off from work..it's a terrible monday..cos i had serious monday blues..wat a way to start the day and the week..but heyz..i'm recovering from it..sky's clearing up..so does my mood! =)

long long time since i last blogged..muz admit..sometimes its juz too lazy to blog..other times..i juz can't seem to be able to put feelings into words..but most of the time..i'm too sleepy when i reach home to even bother go online..and in office..i'm no longer as free as i used to be 3 months ago.fast hor? 3 months since i started working..and it's be another 3 months before i leave panasonic..sort of confirmed tis today..when i told my boss and agency that i'm willing to work till mid-june..and was looking at de calendar juz now..de exact date wud most prob be june 17..exactly 6 months since i started working..and dat day is a friday..juz nice..and it's 1 week before my b'day! =D

eh..bell for knock off juz rang! i can go home le! hehe..wanted to write somemore 1..but hor..i dun remember wat i wanted to say..and since i can go home..i shall not stay anymore..today is de day i dun wanna stay in office..hehe..cont tomolo..if i remember wat i wanna say..if not i'll come up with new tots for tml..

eh..do ur part leh..keep this blog lively..doesn't matter if all you hav to say is less den 100 words..sumtimes..it's really the effort that counts..and wat's really disappointing at times..is when you find out that pple juz can't be bothered at times..

2005-02-13T00:06:00.000+08:00

heyz pple..
we met up today..or shd i say yest?anyway..u get wat i mean..12 Feb kz..went Kbox in the morn...attendance not bad wor..6 out of 7..muz praise yc here..thanks for making de effort to come..hmmm...seems like u din even touch de mike today..most prob paid for de teriyaki chicken meal and tea..luckily u like it..treat it as a trip to a cafe with noisy singers kz..hehe..=p not forgetting to compliment kiu also..cos he came with us...and had to do the dirty job of singing all de songs which we hav no idea how to sing...den had to biao1 gao1 yin1 for some parts of some songs..not easy..considering de fact dat he is still nursing a sore throat..so..*pats pats* on the shoulders for both of you kz..really appreciate the effort you guys put in...=) btw..thanks to kiu..for your 6 panadols over de past 2 days! *^-^*

okie..now hor..muz apologise to kenny la..knoe he wun take it to heart..but still..it seems so bad..dat we are scolding and blaming him for sth dat is not his fault..but we juz to niao you la..juz for de sake of it..and tinking on de bright side..it means we care bout ur existence u knoe..so next time hor..if u dun wanna get a earful of scolding from all 3 members of STG..make sure you plans your outings so that they dun clash with ours kz...and hor..as for de other MIB aka timothy..how long has it been since we last saw you?!? okie..i shd say i see you..cos tink de rest saw you before you book in for field camp..knoe its not your fault dat u din come today..cos u had to book in in de evening..juz hope to see you soon..hmmm..acty wonder if u will even get to see de post...

hmmm..it's a nice feeling when u meet up with frens dat you haven seen for so long...we may not be close..but it's heartwarming to know dat we all still hav de urge deep within us to keep in contact..if not we wud not even bother turning up for today's meet up at mdm tan's hse..talking bout tis leh..yt..thanks for de big sacrifce you hav to make by turning down 3 other home visits juz to make it for tis one..tink we all appreciate it...=) somehow..we are always faced with choices..and forced to make sacrifices...sigh..tis is life..nobody can escape from it..so let's live with it...in de best way possible.. =) hmmm..tink chaneng also chose us over her SJ mates..not as big a decision compared to yt..but still.. i tink she muz hav struggled while deciding...small gestures dat let us know we are of higher importance...

not sure if wat i tink bout u pple thru today's outing is correct...but i juz wanna let u pple knoe..i'm really glad to knoe you pple as frens...at least concern shown for you pple are acknowledged..veri impt wor...cos its de drive dat keeps a person going to cont showing care and concern for others...pple are all selfish by nature ba...we wud be lying if we say we dun mind giving without recieving..wat varies from individual to individual...is de amt dat they need to recieve in order to keep them going...for some...juz a thanks frm de person wud suffice...for others...they might expect de same treatment in return..

today hor...also realised dat life really veri unpredictable and fragile at times leh...esp after hearing all de tekong talks..its like almost everyone in tekong has fallen ill at least once..treatment there seems so bad..muz admit dat respect for NS men really upgrade alot ever since guys in our batch go t enlisted..den today recieve news dat got fren kena admitted into hosp..scenes of seeing xl lying on de hosp bed juz flashed across my mind..was really worried..i knoe i'm tinking and worrying too much..but i really dun wish to go thru de kinda pain once again..

acty ever since xl left last yr...i try to make an effort of telling pple to take care as a signing off msg..sometimes is like i can continuously remind de same person to take care many many times within a conversation...i find it fan2 myself la..but can't help it..telling pple to take care makes me feel more at ease..although i knoe these 2 words hav no help when they really meet with trouble..

u knoe..sometimes when u are so worried...like i was for de whole of today afternoon..all u wish for is dat de person wud be well...how u are treated no longer matter...not even if de person has hurt you before..not 1st time i felt tis way...dat time when i heard dat my fren nose bled profusely..i really hoped dat she wud be fine..even though i was kinda pissed with her at dat time..u wud realise dat health and well-being of ur frens are more impt den anything else...you wud rather lose contact with them forever...in exchange for their well-being..at these times..u wud feel dat sheng1 li2 is less terrible den si3 bie2...fear has great power..it can really change ur mindset within de short time frame..

tink u all muz be confused again...haha..sorry for messing up u pple's tots so frequently these few days...but i really need to tell u pple how much u all mean to me..i dun wanna regret in future for not having told u guys..

2005-02-09T13:21:00.000+08:00

Hmmm…at least this time round I see more entries on the blog le…yawnz….happy cny to all..wonder if most pple r still in bed….e road is totally empty now…just went to my grandma’s place to get my charger back n withdraw money give mama….was told 2nd pay come already…350++….must try to avoid touching that money…n of cos save up the ang bao money…just now heard a lion dance troupe lorry going down circuit road…kinda wanna go along again this yr leh…ah shucks…but I guess it’s time I retired…shall not talk bout field camp or any such stuff cos it’s kinda boring to always hear bout recruits n their tales…haha…trying to recover my voice…hopefully e water parades will help…

Haizz….zhen1 shi4 de4….evry1 of us should avoid staying up till so late….esp since we r all such gan3 qing2 fan4 lan4 de4 ren2….pardon me if I use wrongly but u guys get e pt…hehe…if there’s smt bout tekong that is positive it would be that life is just damn simple down there….dun hafta worry too much…dun hafta think too much….at nite u can’t even stay up to haf weird tots popping out for ur head…haha..but that aside…shall just say that evry1 starts to haf new year resolutions when eva e new yr comes n all e rubbish…but sometimes dun set resolutions that dun make sense or change e person that u r….unless it is a change for e betta….starting from last yr I found new year resolutions dumb already….but mayb it’s cos I always set ones that I no is practically impossible for me to achieve 1…but think bout it….y make ourselves do things we dun want to right? If we really needed to get smt done….we dun hafta set any stupid resolutions ar….we will just get it done lo…y bother to put a one-liner sentence into ur brain n keep psychoing urself n reminding urself bout it n be restrained by it like a law….u set a resolution cos u wanna achieve smt…when ya do smt that does not comply with it u start scolding urself or wat eva…u dun set e resolution n just get on with life n when u dun achieve it in the end u start thinking why din I make an effort to try….at the end of e day both making n not making resolution dun make a difference…hmmm…..i starting to not uds wat I toking about le….as usual…haha….e instructors in tekong tell us…live each day by each day…dun think bout wat u’ll have tomolo or next wk…life gets along betta…when e day has passed…it’s another day passed...simple as that….den at e morning u tell urself it’s a new day….but my kinda thinking is I like keeping things plain n simple…thinking too far n too wide neva brings about much joy into ur life….reading too deep into stuff oso lets u discover stuff u wish u neva knew…but this is e xiong1 wu2 da4 zhi4 kinda way of thinking….n it’s each to his own in this complex society that we live in now…

2005-02-06T21:21:00.000+08:00

seems that most of us are affected by the thinking-wild/deep-thots-in-the-middle-of-the-nite syndrome.. had a lot in mind to say in response to sq's post, but cos i respect ur privacy n all i can't say too much here. but wanna share sth that i read somewhere before.. whoever said that when ur mad at someone, that person suffers? often we keep all the hurt inside and nv really come to terms with it.. and the ppl who haf hurt u may not even realise the extent of the damage done and happily live on with their lives, not knowing that u haf suffered so much cos of them.. so acty is it really worth it? to relieve all the pain and anger and hurt agn? knowing that it doesnt affect that person one bit? u can nv take away the memories of wad u once had.. so it may be near impossible to forget wad had happened in the past.. but i do believe that whatever u focus on becomes bigger in ur life, and wadeva u ignore, becomes smaller. since u've made e decision to move on with life, look ahead to the future ba... we haf so much more in the future ahead of us! be optimistic yea?

on a side note, we must really come up with sth to prevent such emotional turmoil in the middle of the nite.. wad if one of us turns suicidal while blogging out our thots?? haha juz kidding. =P

2005-02-05T23:45:00.000+08:00

hey pplez!
was still wondering whether i shd delete de entry i posted tis morn..but i guess..i'll juz leave it..sorry to all those who are blur after reading it..but i've seriously no intentions of saying more.. knoe its kinda selfish of me..wanting to share my tots..but not letting u all knoe wat exactly happened..forgive me yeah?

woke up tis morn feeling de strong determination to get on with life again..kept myself occupied by reading de book which i hav been longing for so long..de story not bad..but it's not as sweet as i tot it wud be..hehe..=p anyway.. i finished like 134 pages..a quarter of de book..shall cont reading tml..yupz..

hmmm..some things never fail to haunt us hor?esp during times when u are trying so hard to forget..memories can get quite irritating at times..hmmm..anyway..after i wrote de entry tis morn..realised dat sacrifices muz be made at times..can't hold on and hope to let go at de same time..impossible 1 la..why am i so stubborn leh?so right..i hope i can be less soft-hearted..some pple are juz not worth de effort i guess..i hope i can be less sentimental..beautiful memories can sometimes turn out to be those dat hurt us in future...but i guess..if they were never beautiful...they wud never hav de chance to be painful...

i muz be more alert! not be so naive..look beyond wat is before me..believe in my own 6th sense and eyes..stop looking back..de past wun come back! nothing will ever be de same again..not even if i get to relive it...cos things hav changed! we are in control of our own lives.. we can choose de kind of lives we want...be it looking forward and living to the fullest...or cont to dwell in de past...i choose to look forward!been foolish for long enough!help me to jia you kz..=p

2005-02-05T02:12:00.000+08:00

hmmm..tis gotta be the latest i ever stayed up since i started work if i never remember wrongly..
reached home ard 12.45am..after going out for class dinner and movie at orchard..de movie was not bad..but i wun say it is worth $8.50..it's called "bayside showdown 2"..a Jap movie bout cops..it's a movie with a storyline..and some hidden humour..lasted for about 2hrs..

after i reached home and showered leh..by de time i settled everything it was already 1am..hair still wet..din wanna wake up with headache tml..so decided to come online to clear mail and spend de time..de later i stayed up..de more i din feel like sleeping..it's like i've been sleeping at 10+ everyday..when i could hav slept later..and done more stuff..maybe my stay up tonight will make up for de days i slept early..

i guess de night always has a certain effect on pple..set them into a more emotional mood..when tots start to flow..when de shield we build ard ourselves breakdown..thought bout some stuff these few days..mostly on my way home..when i was listening to de songs that accompanied me thru the tough prelims and A levels period..they brought back lotsa memories..de good and bad ones..not that i wanna be thick skinned..but i really tink i deserve a pat for surviving thru dat period of time..up to now..tinking back..it still hurt when certain memories are brought back..thanks to de sotongs for being there for me..

set a new year resolution for myself..told chaneng bout it.."get on with life!" ..i held firmly by it for the whole of today..but juz now..when i reached home and started reading some stuff...i lost de battle against myself again..i dun remember how many times hav i told myself to let go and get on with life..it's always during de late nights which i stay up that my mind lose de battle to my emotions..dun ask me why i can't let go..i used to tink it wud be easy for me to put it down...but after so long...i'm still only at the stage of trying..nobody can tell me wat to do..cos even if they do...i might not listen to them also..it is really a battle with myself..sometimes i feel really tired..wanna give up on letting go..but i knoe if i cling on..it wud juz be more diff to let go in future..de more u put in..de more u expect out of it..i'm still a selfish person at times..de struggle between holding on to de little hope..and giving up completely..y give hope if you can't promise anything?de pain brought by hopes dashed hurt more den never having any in de 1st place..cos it's a fall from a much higher level..if i'm asked whether i wud choose de same route when given de chance again..i'm not sure of de ans myself..cos not all are bad..argh..y am i so contradicting?hav nothing in de 1st place or hav it and den lose it?

i'm not dat magnanimous as chaneng tinks i am..i still can't face wat i dun dare/want to face..sigh..sometimes all i want is a hug...or a shoulder for me to lean on when all i wanna do is to stop tinking..i hope someone wud help me do the tinking at times..i wanna recieve and not juz be giving all de time...but i guess it wud be quite a long time before i get wat i'm wishing for..and by den..wud i be able to give as much as i did?i'm not so sure if i can ever find back de same feeling...and at de same time i'm not sure if i wanna be reminded of de feeling..will it bring back pain or sweet memories?

doesn't matter if u dun understand wat i'm talking bout..i juz needed an outlet..dun bother asking me wat tis is about..if u already knew..u will understand..if u dun..den forget wat u juz read...

2005-01-22T10:06:00.000+08:00

ok..only have abt half an hr to type out everything. so here goes.

work sucks. when you've nothing to do. or when you're waiting for sthg. like printouts or excel file. cos ppl will think you're slacking, but quite the opposite. you're stressed up cos ppl think you're slacking. ahh but does it matter. lowly temp staff get misunderstood for everything they do. hmm i love last last week..when work kept piling up and you've no time to think of anything else..and there'll confirm be sthg to do the next day. haiz..

aft what happened these few days i really think nothing can be definite. but i dun really believe in carpe diem anyway. maybe i just like stuff that are more long term. haiz..just..dun be surprised by change anymore.

aiya stupid half an hr is up. but i've sort of finished typing what i wanted to. just didn't go into details. tata..cya guys agn soon. kiu and timmy..dun feel too sad we know it's tough but just hang on! every ns man goes thru wad u're gg thru!

2005-01-19T21:23:00.000+08:00

Hmmm..i’m back from camp le after 14 days…..acty these 14 days haven been too long….passed q fast….cos e training wasn’t tough at all hafta say…booked out on erm….13th I think…for interview…ya…chiong cab anyhow…so spent like 32 bucks on transport that day…haha….think oso hopeless le…dun bother waiting for them to call me back le…met st 2 n 3 for lunch…haha…n after that basically had nth to do le…just a day off from seeing sgt joseph I guess…haha…n my watch beeps again…another hour gone…time waits for no 1….well…to intro my bunk abit…12 pple in all….bed 1..RJ accepted by Harvard le…bed 2…national kayaking champions…even gals will be envious of his figure….bed 3-6 nth interesting….7..national judo champion...whom I heard was the one that helped his team win the championship..sent to sea games…8..national water polo champion….9 is me la….10 n 11..e NCC cadet lieutenants…e know everything bout army pple….n 12..yet another kayaker with a body to envy…n he has 3 thumbs…no kidding…so basically…my bunk as well as my entire company is really wat u call e crème of e crop le…abit e scary la…haha…n e reporting sick rate is mad…today outta 50 in my platoon 17 was not fit for duty….haha…siao rite…dun laugh….i oso kena that….even though I din want to be one of e report sick 1…but somehow tekong got no money for first aid kit….so when I scalded my fingers with boiling water I was sent to the medical officer n he gave me 3 days off duty…DAMN IT…now e scalded part skin start to peel le….haha…along with the large pieces of skin that r peeling from my shoulder downwards due to sunburn…I feel like I’m a snake shedding skin now…haha….basically there’s been nth eventful to report of yet I guess….only minor minor details which I shall mention when eva e chance comes by….

Acty I’m in quite a weird mood now…haha….something like e mood I get into when eva it is in the still of the nite…but it’s slightly different….complicated mood la…haha…but saw smt that triggered off tots in me…many things in life once u do le….e impacts r irreversible….n they r often limited not only to urself but oso onto others…so we should always think twice b4 doing anything…n not be reckless…but yet how un-reckless should we be? If we think too much…many a times we find ourselves missing out on e chances that r only there for that moment…or convince ourselves to not try it out…den end up regretting n saying in the future “damn it…if only I had….” So where is the correct balance???? Or there is no such things as a balance…typically I belong to the think too much grp…so I keep finding myself saying that whole phrase…so I tell myself at times to learn from nike….just do it….but when eva I do that….things cock up again…hai…even when I tried to find a good balance btwn the 2…I still managed to screw things up….hmmm…using a somewhat no link quote “time heals all wounds”...but in that quote e meaning is tat time will remove the temporary effects such as pain n others with time...but upon healing e scare is there...just like if a snake bites u e snake bite scare will 4eva make u scared of snakes..so do we go about venturing into the unknown n risk harm to ourselves n others...or do we stay still n take the safe n conservative n neva progressive way outta things..hmmm....once again jeremy kiu has succeeded in typing out a chunk bout things that pple haf been talking bout since long long time ago....n put it out in a rather confusing manner...oh well...shalll just stop here le la...initially still fresh n energetic 1...but after thinking bout this.....haha...half exhausted le...n i totally dunnno to support nike's just do it...or e older pple's teachings to "think twice b4 doing"...hehe...i bet some pple see my blog wil haf e "wat eva la" feelings 1....

2005-01-17T19:52:00.000+08:00

Hey my turn my turn!! i wan my post on tiger cup too since u all had all the time to blog during ur work time but i dun haf i shall do it now.. Being a CSO is getting harder by the day.. Gotta memorise all the ministries' address telephone and email and test coming up which will qualify me to become a full CSO.. Okie stress aside gotta destress now.. Hmm let's do a review on each and every lion who played a part in the tiger cup victory... there goes..

FIRST TEAM

18 LIONEL LEWIS
GOALKEEPER
YOUNG LIONS
Wad can i sae? MVP!!! Haha seems like he has become the idol of the sotongs in HTG so nid i sae more? Since he displaced Hassan Sunny as Lions' first choice keeper he has not looked back and turned in great performances especially the draws between Sing and Indo and Vietnam. Singapore surely cant do without him. Besides look at his age: 21 yrs old. Realised its LIONel haha truly a LION.

6 BAIHAKKI BIN KHAIZAN
RIGHT BACK
YOUNG LIONS
Hmm this 20 yr old is an unpolished gem when Avramovic decided to put him into the fray. Since then he has gone from strength to strength. He has even been earmarked by peter Withe as the future defensive stronghold of Singapore to take over from Aide and Mani. Strong in the air and timely tackles are ur strong points. Way to go boy. U are the man now.

16 DANIEL BENNETT
LEFT BACK
SAF UNITED
Here's my idol of the team! This ang moh has snubbed the offers of British clubs like Wrexham to come back to S league where he joined the Warriors (SAF). He then go on to don the Red and White stripes of Singapore. Loyalty plus sheer talent has made him a cear favourite among the fans. A tactical switch by Avramovic to put him on the left back slot and he has not failed in that position outlining his versatility across the backline. 24 yrs. Still a long way to go!

5 AIDE ISKANDAR
CENTRAL BACK
HOME UNITED
Captain Marvel! His smoothing influence has calm the defence and is the main reason of the defensive success of Singapore. He let his feet do the talking and lead by example although occasional shoutings and encouragements do come out from his mouth. The only blot was his red card against the indonesians but that wasnt enuf to spoil his mood in lifting the Tiger Cup trophy high up in the air with utmost dignity!!

14 SUBRAMANI SHANMEGAM
CENTRAL BACK
HOME UNITED
The Vice Cap! a poor guy hu was at the end of the BOTTLEGATE incident at the match between Singapore and Myanmar. Even dat cound not taunt him from stopping to tackle the Myanmar players. Nuttin could stop this dude man. Quick in tackles and smartest defender i shud sae. Ever finding the cleverest way out to clear the ball. Probably his last Tiger Cup tournament and nuttin beats the feeling of winning the Tiger Cup before finally calling it a day!

17 SHARIL ISHAK
RIGHT MID
YOUNG LIONS
The fact that he has revived the no.17 last worn by Singapore's fav soccer son speaks volume of how mucht the coaching staff have put their faith on the young shoulders of this 20 yr old. Not only did he not break under such high expectations, he carried them magnificently as he sprayed those passes and guided those torpedo-like freekicks with deadly accuracy. Singapore has long been deprived of a true playmaker but u noe wad? Not any more..

22 ITIMI DICKSON
LEFT MID
YOUNG LIONS
This dude is fast! He performs his task! And he sure doesnt rust! Under the FTS (Foreign Talent Scheme), we were so grateful to get hold of this skilful Nigerian who turn the Indonesian defence inside out and sure showed them wad Singapore Samba is like. At a mere 168m, he is qt short as compared to the 170 and 180 Singapore players but this diminutive has kick some asses. 20 yr ol. Watch out!

7 GOH TAT CHUAN
CENTRAL MID
WOODLAND WELLINGTON
The Huang Fei Hong in the team. Chinese. Nv fear to put a leg in to stop Boas Salossa, Moe Syut Min, Kurniawan, Aiboy and many more other star opponent players. he is the reason why opponents have find it so hard to play their flowing attacking football. Dirty he is but efficient. Unspectacular he is but again efficient. WIth him the Chinese potential players can dream of donning the Lions' jersey once more. Way to go China boy!

4 HASRIN JAILANI
CENTRAL MID
GEYLANG UNITED
Another Hardcore player who belonged to the same mould of Goh. Has worked well with Goh to forge one of the unbreakable midfield in the tournament.

10 INDRA SAHDAN
FORWARD
HOME UNITED
Did u see dat goal? No not e one where he turned Jaap Stam to score against Man U a couple of years ago. Yes the one scored at the National stadium which makes the agg score between Singapore and Indonesia 4-1 and further pushes Singapore nearer to the trophy. Since the retirement of Fandhi, Indra has been the nearest to the title as Singapore's fav footballing son and boy he couldnt have choosen a betta time to score dat goal. Clearly one to rmb down the road.

20 AGU CASHMIR
FORWARD
YOUNG LIONS
Erps y is my mind blank now? haha okie com'on Avra has his reason in putting him in the side. Mebbe can ask Gerard Houllier y did he put Hesky in the Liverpool team and u probably wud get the same ans. So com'on he sure did some part for Spore. Rmb he succeeded in failing to balloon the shot against Myanmar and the 'wonderful' tap in in the 1st leg and the all-so-difficult penalty he scored in the 2nd leg. Applaud! He surely is a Nigerian.. Eh i mean Singapo..r..e..a..n.. Eh my tongue suddenly fail to move!

RESERVES

19 KHAIRUL AMRI
CENTRAL MID
YOUNG LIONS
This boy wonder could have made it to the first team if not for the magnificent four of Itimi, Ishak, Goh and Jailani. He did justify Avra's decision to put him in the 1st leg against Indonesia. He was weaving in and out of the defence and was the key to Singapore's 3-1 win. He surely deserved to kiss the Tiger Cup trophy and it wun be long before he starts to appear on the starting lineup.

8 NOH ALAM SHAH
FORWARD
TAMPINES ROVERS
Oh pls tell me y he lost the yellow head monster?? He is the hat trick hero la. W-H-Y-Y-Y
I have so nuttin to sae...

MAN BEHIND THE SCENES

RADDY AVRAMOVIC
Serbia and Montenegro coaching genius. Toast to him!!!!!

Okie well this is it.. The TIGER CUP at last huh... But u noe wad... No one realli expected us to make it thru the group stage let alone the finals... So now they have all the sh*t in their face... Well cant blame them too cos we surely werent at our best in the past since 1998 when we won our last tiger cup trophy... But here's a song for the LIONS:

There was a time when pple say dat the Lions wun made it but we did.
There was a time when failings were too much for us to take but we did.
We r the Lions...
Face the Roar...
Reaching out together...
For Fame and Glory...

This is our soccer.
This is our team.
This is our passion.
This is our life.
This is our commitment.
This our pledge.
We r the Lions...
Roar the L-i-ons..................

Adapted from the u noe la..

2005-01-17T16:33:00.000+08:00

heyHEY~ posted on my own blog abt tiger cup finals le, but fingers veri itchy.. and got a lot of time to slack ard until 6pm.. and got so much emotions and feelings after last nite i shall blog more here..

last nite, reached home abt 11.30pm.. buses were all filled to the max by hordes of lions supporters.. but me and yt managed to get onto bus 31 thankfully.. kenny got home the latest.. half dead today at work, like me.. now 4.30pm, cannot tahan already.. went to make nescafe, overloaded on the coffee powder, now on a caffeine high.. hope i can sleep tonite.. i super sensitive to caffeine one. ah shat wad was i saying? rite, tiger cup.. oh yea, i really called up FAS le.. asked abt how to join Lions fans club.. unfortunately, they dun open it to the public!! *sobz* apparently, u must join one of the s league fan clubs, den u are eligible to be a lions fan. gee.. i REALLY wanna support s league lehh.. den which 1 i supposed to join? geylang?? mad. budden makes sense la, if i wanna support national team, at least must support domestic league rite? like, england fans oso got their own domestic epl clubs mahh. gee.. acty i did give it some thot la.. tink if i really wan, will support young lions.. cos all the new blood will come from there, shld be qt exciting to support them.. and anw, lionel lewis, khairul amri, itimi dickson and agu (pui) is part of young lions mah, hehe. so ppl, if u all wan oso, lemme noe k.. ill go find out more. ultimately, i really wanna be one of the die hard fans cheering singapore on during the big matches accompanied by the drums and cheerleader, yee hah!

oh yea, forgot to blast agu casmir on my blog, sq ask me to haf mercy, cos anw he scored the penalty mah.. but who can't score a penalty sia? (david beckham muahaha) seriously, agu really really reminds me a certain notorious ex-liverpool player: emile heskey!!! heskey is slow and big and clumsy. agu: same. heskey is disliked by fans and every1 can't understand why the manager chooses to play them. agu: same. heskey is fielded almost primarily bcos he "commands attention from defenders and has 'presence' in the penalty area". agu: same. (in fact, agu's 'presence' is so evident that he acty blocked dunno who's shot that could acty have gone into goal!! %$#^#) to sum up, agu and heskey both sama-sama cannot make it!! argh. can't we somehow smuggle another striker in from some other country? and whatever happened to the supposed understanding between agu and itimi? i only saw it once during the 1st leg sing-indo match when itimi dickson supplied the cross for agu to tap in.. gee. i can foresee agu creating many more blunders (a la emile heskey) in the matches to come.

ok, scold finish le. next up, i wanna scold the #$#% referee!! arghh!! aide iskandar didnt deserve the 2nd yellow card can! den he kenna sent off just 2 mins before the final whistle, like dat he oso shuang?? i mean, wad's the pt! den the indo keeper handled the ball so far outside the box, he only get yellow card! i thot afc follow fifa regulations? plain bulls*** la.. friggin double stds la.. wonder how afc chooses their refs.. cmi siaaa.

but other den dat, the match was simply beautiful.. the atmosphere in the stands.. the players' outstanding performances.. (for more on dat check out my blog heh.) acty im very tempted to type out q's tribute song to indra.. cos he simply ROCKED!! ok la will credit it to q.. here goes!

you are my INDRA
my only INDRA
you make me happy
when skies are grey
you never know dear
how much I LOVE YOU(!!)
please don't take my INDRA away.....

copyright 2005- Jeremy Kiu Jia Jun

haha im so boh liao... ok im done crapping... back to work!!

2005-01-17T10:08:00.000+08:00

heyoz..tis is a blog from office..i'm done with my work for the morning..now waiting for emails to come in before i can continue doing..woohoo..de tiger cup match last night was..wow!! it's really a once in a lifetime experience..too bad yc,tim and kiu were not there with us..if not it wud have been better..

ask yourself..how often do u see 99% of the National stadium decked in red tops..majority of them wearing the t-shirt for the official die-hard fans of the lions on days other than 9 Aug?
how often do u hear Singaporeans coming together to cheer for our home soccer team?!
how often do u acty see gals going to support soccer 'live'..and being a part of it??
how often can u be part of de crowd to witness Singapore winning a soccer title..nvm de fact dat it is only a regional 1?

wahaha..those were de questions i asked myself after the match..de spirit was great! everyone had fun and everyone was happy..even on the way home..we could hear pple cheering still..at MRT stations..all u need is one person to start cheering..and u wud hear de rest of the soccer fans that were present response..

and from yest..i found my soccer idol..lionel lewis! great goalkeeper!lost count of how many goals he saved last night..de 1 he failed to save..not his fault! it was acty a goal by luck lor..went in when de situation in front of the goalpost was in chaos..but nvm..we still won..wahaha..dat's all dat matter.. =) and hor..de stupid referee..too many yellow cards to flash..even had to flash red card la..alamak..tink he really cock-eyed at times leh..and agu..de moment i spot him on field with ball last night..i wanna laugh liaoz..he juz look so comical la..miss header most of de times..

hehe..shall let de guys do de updates on de details..gals dun bother bout tis kinda things..and our commentary wun be as good..tataz..dat's all for my entry from office..=P

2005-01-09T13:52:00.000+08:00

hmmm..sunday..wat am i doing leh..slacking at home..sigh..i'm still worried..tml going back to work le..prepared for all de scolding dat may be coming my way cos of my own blunder..hopefully my worries are unduly...and my worklife still cont peacefully...muz learn not to be so sotong at work le..getting busy le..not as much time as last time to slack le..dun wanna lose my job after working for less den a month..

3 days after kiu's enlistment..2 days after timothy's and my class guys' enlistment..will tink bout them at times...wonder bout how they are getting on in camp..whether they are getting used to de life in there...but leh..only recieved news frm tim and 1 of my class guys so far..acty everytime recieve sms frm de guys in camp..quite happy dat they bother to let de pple out here knoe how they are getting on...at least we will knoe they are getting on fine in there..=)

12 more days before they will be out..den can see them again..by then they wud look diff le..with de hair gone..black specs..and perhaps more built...watever it is..all de best to de guys in camp..take care of yourselves..see ya when u're out...=)

2005-01-05T11:48:00.000+08:00

Hey... Wad a day.. Long time nv sit down in frnt of the com to do nuttin le.. Last few days were chalet and den it was the spore match den desperate job search.. Hmmm the feeling of everyone working while u r still slacking at hm is bad but i guess it isnt as bad as the guys gg NS tml le.. Their xin qing muz be v ruan now.. Small tots big tots.. Confusion Perplexion.. Ya its onli three weeks ma wth but come to think of it u think every weekend can slack or come out meh.. Gotta slp ah.. suay suay ganna detention barracks DB.. Hmmm will blog on this later..

Firstly tell u all abt my sentosa experience.. Seriously its been a long time since i ve gone into sentosa le.. Its so quiet.. No many tourist ard.. I guess its weekday ba.. Hmmm but i went to Beaufort hotel via the yellow line bus w pomp.. Den had to take the hotel bus to the admin block.. Darned its so far away la.. Weird rite.. Anw ya waited there for 30 mins i think for the application form cos there were simply too many pple there le.. Heh meanwhile look for other jobs in the classified.. Still cant get any.. Man this is realli hard.. Yupz finally we got the interview.. We interviewed to be a porter w 1000bucks per mth but.. We got intot he fnb (food n beverage).. To be employed as a temp staff for banquets hahaha.. ya those xi2 jiu3.. Company annual dinner.. Functions n wad have u.. This realli isnt the stable kinda job dat i am looking for.. So anithing lo shall do this while i find a more suitable job..

Hehz.. Yest the dinner was prob the last dinner b4 we HTG got full attendance on 22 jan (which i hope tim n q wun be too tired to meet) No more aft work dinner le.. Dats y i felt a tinge of yi yi bu she when i saw q left to take the east bound tren.. Weird.. LTG will liddat haha.. Anw was telling q online we may meet for dinner still the remainder of us den we shall call him n mass tok or conference w him during admin time 930pm to 1030pm (it deps one i think..) hmm but u all have to go back late lo.. Nvm sacrifice some days nvm hor? hehe..

Meanwhile.. those hu r working (in fact most of u).. Jia u man.. Den i shall jia u to find one too.. If can slack den slack lo.. Slack can still be paid ma.. Hehheh.. Work is liddat de la.. Or we tag or use yahoo chatrm or ssth else like at chocs or cookies to kill boredom lo.. Peeps take care man!! Dun work too hard too.. CNY coming soon le muz take care of health to savour all the delicacies.. K Sayonara!! =)

2005-01-05T05:56:00.000+08:00

oh wth...great way to start a post..but seriously...i just saw one of e most rubbish match of the year...billions of shots...no goals...1 shot on target by tottenham...a 50 yard anyhow whacked ball by tottenham...**projectile motion** ball dips down into goal...but carroll was underneath it..until he decided he was playing volleyball instead of soccer n chose to "set" e ball backwards....BRAVO!! e whole ball was spilled by him as he let e whole ball totally go into the net as he desperately lunged to keep the ball that was almost gonna touch the net....N WAT HAPPENED??!! e blind linesman n referee could not see that it had gone past the goal line..oh wth...even from 60m out camera i could tell it was in le la...so much for parallax error...time to change contacts ref!! i already throw away mine le!! urs is daily disposable is it? wear whole day eyes too dry by e nite le ar...n did i mention?? rio became a striker...superb tactical play by fergie...or should i say fer-gie-la..

hmmm...enuf verbal attack on man utd...wat to do when u've 4 strikers n 3 r out...**pats ce on the back** i uds how u feel..mellor not v good oso...just now online till dunno wat time decided headache should go lie down...haha..n once lie down dun get up...got up in the middle of e 1st half of e match...yawnz...headache seems to haf subsided...shall try to sleep again...haha...later den blog again....

2005-01-04T13:27:00.000+08:00

Hmmm.. This is a msg from Bedok Town Sec.. yup was bored so i took time off to browse the photos on this blog. Was juz wonderin if the last photo in kiu's album is a photo of debbie and kiu together, cos i havent realli seen debbie b4 haha. Yar k, i'll blog more if i haf the time.
Cya ppl soon!~

2005-01-03T10:48:00.000+08:00

2nd jan 2005 Sunday...rainy...

woke up today realising i'd dozed off e a few hours ago abandoning pple online...wasted...last chance to chat to many of them le...now online all oso go off to sleep or dunno wat le....darn...but today was one heck of a memorable day i guess...2nd jan...been waiting for this day for a couple of wks le...finally e singapore leg of the semi-finals against myanmar..but once wake up...e sky was raining one of those kinda rains that u no wun end v soon...so starts e prayers that e rain stops by afternoon.....soon after that came ken's call tat he coming down my house to rest 1st...after his 2 nites chalet...yc supposedly went to meet cheryl...an hr after he reached...once he laid down on e mattress no 1 could wake e giant piece of black mass up...den i oso went to doze...but e rain still persisted...time to make some phone calls n confirm stuff...after 45mins of deliberation...decided to just heck evrything n go...off to boon keng to find st 3...haha...n we missed e bus stop.....good thing there was a way to get our asses to boon keng...attempts to find yc proved futile as he lived up to his reputation as a pig...hmmm..we tooked a certain path to walk to the national stadium from e mountbatten mac bus stop..n well...a toad decided to join in the crowd as it suddenly appeared in front of us as we walked..but i think it found us abit unfriendly as st 3 screamed upon the sight of it...so off it hopped off to find some other company...e rainwater seemed to haf magical powers that day as yt's sandals which got into contact with e water magical grews legs n din want to stay onto st 3's legs(or tentacles???)...turned out e path sucked n we decided to take e super long way to e stadium...causing us to miss seeing myanmar's 1st goal..but good thing i guess...i get abnormally stressed up bout a soccer match...

match highlights provided by alaka:
??? minute :vietnam tried clearing the ball but e number 5 miscued e clearance...e ball got to agu who managed to pressure the defender marking him to send e ball into his own net...the score read 1-1..but only for 1 min...e score dropped immediately after e referee said that the goal din count as alamk shah had orginally made a foul on a vietnam player..wth...

??? minute : a poor clearance by the singapore defence caused the ball to hobble to a myanmar player...the defence in disarrays could not close him down fast enuf..n e player with a miscued whack of e boot sent a relatively slow ball roll into the back of the net as lionel lewis was wrong footed..0-2

70th minute: myanmar's number 9 was yellow-carded for a second bookable offence...ding dong...time for floodgates to open...

74th minute: indra's persistence caused mayhem in the myanmar defence as the ball dropped to goh tat chuan on singapore's right flank...with a picture perfect cross he finds the loanshark alam shah...he knocks it down...n a myanmar defender assists in pushing the ball into the back of the net!!! GOAL!!! 1-2 to singapore....wonder who the goal will be given to...

87th minute: myanmar number 6 was the last man as he brought down the singaporean hero indra sahdan...a professional foul..and thus a straight red card was shown...the burmese aren't pleased..and their number 5 chose to reflect this in the most direct way...by kicking mud at the referee...ANOTHER SENDING OFF FOR MYANMAR..it's now 11 against 8...indra steps up to take the penalty....????!!!!....he misses as the ball clips the outside of the upright....from hero to zero? we'll see

EXTRA time : with 11 man playing against 8...there was no more match to be seen...the only action was probably ended after alam shah sealed off his hat trick and agu FINALLY SCORED -_-" but i must say one of e myanmar players deserve an oscar for his brilliant display of theatrical talent...after being given a slight push in the chest...he grabbed his face and fell down to the ground as though he'd been shot in the face...haha...BRILLIANT!! ENCORE!!! and the myanmar reserve keeper should change career from goalkeeping to darts...with maximum accuracy he sent a water bottle flying smack on subramani's face...that'd haf scored him a maximum 200 if he'd been shooting darts...final score...4-2....

hmmm...a few things to mention...v long neva see a singaporean crowd as big as today le..n finally singapore won...haha...there are many rumoured reasons behind e win...but i shall take them as nonsense...but still...an amazing sight..all 3 STG members were there..n u could say e whole ltg was there...as yc sent a representative pig in the form of ce's beanie...and all this was achieved despite the persistant rain the whole day...well done...this is the end of the match report from me...expect quite a few entries from me as i countdown the 68hrs of freedom left...

2005-01-03T10:25:00.000+08:00

woohoo, 6 members of htg turned up for the 2nd leg of tiger cup semifinals Singapore vs Myanmar at national stadium!! what a milestone in history!! haha.. too bad sq wasnt sitting wif us... and pig yc was living up to his name.. we all yelled our throats hoarse at an imcompetent lions team and a kayu referee and a belligerent myanmar team.. last nite was an astounding display of poor sportsmanship where numerous fights erupted (3 times? 4 times?) thruout the match which resulted in 3 burmese players getting sent off (some striker after 2 bookable offences, another guy for an horrid tackle, and the last idiot who kicked mud at the officials) haha acty, i realise i dun rem very clearly the details of the match, i shall leave the job of describing the entire thing to the guys la.. basically its tough to keep track of how the goals went in and who scored when the goal post is at the far end of the pitch and u dun have camera closeups and instant replays.. but i guess nobody cared cos just when the ball hits the back of the net the crowd goes mad. haha.. ok i shall blog abt wad yt and i saw during the match and leave the technical details to the guys.

firstly, there was this #@$!@ uncle who 1. kept standing up during the match and blocked me and yt's view and yt couldnt see the 1st 2 goals that went in. 2. went so crazy during the goal celebrations that he opened his umbrella and shook the water at every1 around him.
and then, there was this bunch of crazy malays and 1 chinese guy sitting directly in front of my classmates. the malay guy goes into a dancing frenzy everytime the lions score and when indra was preparing to take the penalty he already had his shirt half off getting ready to take it off when indra missed. hahhaha. oh and not to mention they were chanting vulgarities incessantly thruout (like most of the crowd la acty) oh and there were these three guys who were yelling "you are a third world country!!" at myanmar and me and yt penged immediately hehe.. yah and my fave cheer of the match has got to be the nonsensical one that goes "na na na na, na na na na, eh-eh, goodbye" and we kept waving bye bye at the burmese haha.. but seriously all the disgusting behaviour on the pitch riled the fans so much that me and yt were damn scared a riot mite break out every minute. but heng the police dealt with the situation well. they escorted most of the burmese fans out of the stadium for throwing all sorts of stuff at the pitch.

when we were exiting the stadium, the fans were still damn high and started singing "ole ole ole ole" even when walking out and the cars were hooting non stop.. hmm, we may just return to the glory years where singaporeans were mad abt singapore football instead of epl football. if singapore really wins the tiger cup, that mite just happen. yep, after that went to old airport rd for supper and the usual crap-talk and we went home at abt 11.30pm.. all in all, it was a great nite!! ehh the venue for the finals havent been confirmed yet (went to sleague.com to check it out) but if its at the national stadium again let's go watch k?! haha im going to makan lunch le will sign off here buh bye!

2005-01-01T13:27:00.000+08:00

happy new yr everyone. ytd's celebration was really quite nothing..as instructed. but downtown east was still a warzone anyway. i bet at sentosa..no one really had the tsunami victims on their minds oso. what you don't see happens anyway.

hmm..my brother just wrote a note to all of us. "happy new year daddy. happy new year mummy. happy new year sister." shall stop myself from sinking into any mood now. but in short, i think my resolution would be to spend more time at home. and miss him more often when i'm working.

i think i know abit of what sq is talking abt. oh well..my point exactly. the person you trust most will hurt you the most. and i do mean it will eventually happen. maybe the only ppl to trust are your family and friends. using the principle of putting all your eggs in one basket.

do i sound funny? i think i do. but i'm fine acty, don't worry. no imposter here. just don't like the idea of using haha's and lol's or any other meaningless words in my sms or blog entries anymore. a new year has begun. time to think more deeply abt everything.

and work is..work. felt quite helpless at some point of time. for having my salary at the hands of the irresponsible agent even though my supervisor is willing to pay more ot. the 44hrs rule. but unfairness reigns everywhere doesn't it. even though inconsistency in timesheet and agent is right in front of us..what can we do. no one bothers abt temp staff. no place to eat, no apology for stepping on foot, and all the blames to take when forms reach the wrong box. i once said i'd get back at them..but can i. sigh..but all the other temp staff are nice at least. i shdn't complain. and the forms provide the entertainment that we need. relax.

i think i just made a blog entry that's very not me. nvm la, as long as it's understandable.

2004-12-19T19:32:00.000+08:00

I Dream - Taufik Batisah.

In my mind
I can climb
All the mountains that surround me
My spirit's there where eagles dare to fly.

In my heart
There's a spark
That can light the world around me
And open door where I am sure dreams are.

Doesn't matter if I win
Or the colour of my skin
'Cause the race is all about
Believing in your self.

'Cause I dream I can run
Like the wind and be strong
When my heart just wants to give in
I dream I can be the hero that's in me
And I dream, I dream.

There's a time
In your life
When the odds are so against you
There's no defeat if all you keep is pride.

First or last
Slow or fast
There's a day within that makes you
The driving won when world has come apart.

Doesn't matter rich or poor
All the things you've done before
'Cause the race is all about
Believing in your self.

And I dream I can run
Like the wind and be strong
When my heart just wants to give in
I dream I can be the hero that's in me
And I dream, I dream...

Of the moment
That forever will be [cold and]
[When the torture's past]
Only dreams will last
That are shared by everyone.

And I dream I can run
Like the wind and be strong
When my heart just wants to give in
And I dream I can be the hero that's in me.

And I dream, I dream, I dream...

2004-12-18T01:30:00.000+08:00

heyz.. juz wanna hav a simple entry on my job seeking experience and my 1st day of work..=)

hmmm... can't remember which was de day i started looking for a job.. tink probably ard 2 weeks ago...started last monday i tink..dat was when i finally settled down after having enough fun and realised it is time for me to get back to working my brains again..it was only den dat i understand de agony of de unemployed when they complained dat it is diff to look for a job in de present job market..cos most of de jobs required experience..which i hav none! hereby.. i wanna express my thanks to kenny, yuanting, chaneng, jeremy kiu, jobstreet, The Straits Times, Unilite, CareerHub, Temp Team.. these are de pple and things dat helped in 1 or another way in helping me find a job.. although some sources din turn out dat helpful..but they helped in 1 way or another..so yupz.. thanks! =)

kz.. shall share abit of my job seeking experience.. seriously speaking.. i'm not 1 dat's too keen on calling up on all de companies whose nos. are listed in de classified section of de newspaper.. cos somehow i find it veri diff to hav to call up de person and ask if they hav de job vacancy..so when kenny told me bout jobstreet.. i was so happy! cos i could apply for jobs without having to call them... and i wud only hav to make de trip down after they hav enlisted me for an interview.. for a few days.. all i did was to diligently go mailbox..check out wat new job alerts they hav for me.. den go jobstreet..see whether got anymore suitable jobs dat is not listed in my mailbox list..den apply thru jobstreet lor..
and during these days..ocassionally went out with yt.. to go for job interviews for jobs listed in Classified..

after a few days.. decided to take a more active approach.. decided to try 2 pronged approach..apply thru Jobstreet and email de companies personally...juz in case de companies dun check their Jobstreet accounts regularly... and this method recieved better response!i recieved a call frm Unilite on monday morning..asking me to go down for interview de next day...when i juz emailed them on Sunday night..or shd i say monday morn..den Temp Team called me too..but cos i'm looking for temp full time jobs..which they dun seem to hav...or maybe cos they are a big company.. recieves lotsa application daily...thus reducing my chance of getting a chance to meet them..i've since heard nothing frm them..CareerHub called too!de job offer was so attractive..was so sure i wanted dat job..so no hesistation...decided to ask Chaneng and yuanting along for de interview..de CareerHub guy by de name of Winston was friendly.. dat was de more relaxed interview i had among my 4...but too bad..wun see him again i guess..another company called too..but offered only weekend jobs..tink it was Metier..sth liddat la..rejected de offer...tink i shd leave my weekends to do personal stuff huh?

okie..passed both interviews at de recruitment centres..went down to Concourse for intervew at Panasonic and Dhoby Ghaut Haw Par Centre for interview at Starhub...Steven Phang..my manager now is quite friendly..he did most of de talking while i listened..and ta da! i got de job...=) de starhub group interview sux! de interviewers were not friendly at all..and cos its group interview...it was so diff to actually grasp de attention of de 2 interviewers..and obviously i flopped tis 1...cos Winston never called...=(

kz..dat's bout all for interview..went for work today..was so nervous can! felt so out of place...be in on de train or in de building lift...went to de 15th storey...was so shocked..de whole level belongs to Panasonic..and u needed a pass to get around.. i din hav 1...how was i supposed to get around!? no choice.. had to call for help..so dialled for steven.. he came and brought me into de office...oh wow!it's cool!it's like wat u see on tv..cubicles and more cubicles.. and each cubicle has its own comp..steven led me to my seat...and i sat there like an idiot..waiting for de supervisor to come.. in de end steven introduced me to Siew Hoon..asked her to lead me ard to get to knoe pple in my section..she's a nice gal.. seated next to me..seperated by a passageway..den i got to knoe lynn, shu teng, hui ping, chak min, norlela, penny... and my supervisor... Lina! these are all nice pple.. and i tink chak min is quite chio.. penny got a princess look..norlela is like de big sis.. juz like Siew Hoon..Lynn is small size...she's de 1 dat said "wo3 hen3 shao3 kan4 dao4 bi3 wo3 xiao3 zi1 de3 ren2"..Huiling and Shu Teng were de 2 i were attached to for today..they were de 1 dat taught me de basics for SAP(de sucky program)..and i'll be attached to huiling on monday.. to cont my learning journey before they let me do on my own...

hmmm..basically i juz sat and watched them work today...they are super pro can....de way they type..de procedures..all within their heads le..so fast..sth i will need to train to achieve...den went for lunch..they brought me to tis malay restaurant in Kampong Glam..de food not bad..and it only cost $4.50 per person..and i got free banana! =P after dat went back office...helped them with some billing stuff... Lina briefed me on de organisation of de company and my job scope..and after a while... i was told i can go home! wahz.. time pass quite fast wor..it was quite a fulfilling day...=)

hehe.. really muz thank kiu..kz..if timothy reads this..he gonna niao like siao..but cannot take things for granted...really appreciate his effort to wake up early to wish me all de best for 1st day of work..and coming down with an umbrella when it was knock-off time...thanks alot! =) after meeting him..took 608 back to DHS to look for yt..long time never go back le..miss de place..and so many changes has taken place..feels kinda detached frm it le..sigh..anyway..slacked ard in CO room..ate my banana! =p after dat.. went to stadium kfc to meet kenny for dinner.. talked somemore crap there.. and de 3 of them were dying frm de sweetness of de drink.. after which we went bugis... bought my cute mug! haha..spent some time deciding whether to buy...bought it in de end...shall bring it to work on monday...den went to take neoprints..wahz..even i tink abit CMI la..so kiddy..hehe...sorry guys!

okie..dat's bout all i hav to say..haha... u pple gonna complain when u see tis post...if u manage to read thru and reach tis sentence..u deserve a pat on ur back..*pat pat*...=P jia you pple...referring to yuanting, chaneng, kenny and yaochen...dun give up! a job will come ur way soon! =) and when dat day comes..we'll hav a feast together kz..if timothy and JK are already in NS..we'll wait for them to be out..promise?

2004-12-15T01:22:00.000+08:00

heyoz..realised i haven blogged for a long time..past few entries were in alternate order of st 3 and kiu..anyway..let's get to de main pt..was acty wondering if i shd blog tonight..cos i'm feeling lazy and tired..and sneezing till my nose gonna fall off..

1stly..really enjoyed myself at de stayover!long time since i stayed up for de sake of staying up..last time stay up was always due to de pressure to complete wat i haven finish studying for de exams..haha..they keep saying i disappeared in de night..acty i never la..i was sleeping on de sofa lor..opposite yc..kiu said i had an awkward position..but dat position was confortable leh..anyway..thanks pple!cos u all fulfilled 3 of my post a levels wishes in de 2 days..1st is de stayover itself, 2nd is our feast at marina south and thirdly..my sudden urge to play captain's ball..though i never get to watch my shutter..de neoprint specially dedicated to it was enough..yupz..wonder when will be our next one..oh yah..btw..still quite disappointed at de fact dat de kite din manage to fly in de end...

really wonder wat hav i been doing tis hols leh..time pass so fast..but i've achieved so little..money depleting so fast..yet i still dun see my paycheck anywhere in sight...sigh..only went for 2 interviews so far..tml..or shd i say today got another 2..hopefully pass both la...den i'll decide which job i want...de better paying 1 or de more challenging 1..tis job seeking experience made me realised some things leh..1 of which being i'm not cut out to be a salesperson.. at least not 1 for charitable organisations...

alamak..nose gonna drop off le la! i surrender..cont tonight or some other time..shun4 bian4 update on my job status next time..and lessons learnt frm de job seeking experience..dat's all for now..nitez pple...

2004-12-13T19:27:00.000+08:00

lalala....it's my turn to blog le...hmmmm...but seemingly nth much to bu3 chong1...kite flying really dunno wat to say...haha....just that initially it was damn comical...haha....can laugh till peng kind...e 1st kite apparently was poked a hole by st 2 cos she did not let it take off e way she wanted n in a blind flurry she kept swinging her arms to grab e away-bound kite....haha...n tat was how e hole came about...2nd kite was a big menace man....hanging loose from my bag..paper bag that is...it flew about n many pple fell victim to its scratches..n walking proved a giant trouble...n wat happened in e end??? the crazy wind n rain of jurong vented its wrath on the poor unprotected kite..."pick on somebody ur own size!!" in the end i think e kite flew highest when sq ran till she had no more energy n simply laid on e grd shouting "ni men zai wan wo a???!!!"
oops...hehehe...

our bu4 fei3 leh....well...noodles was a big mistake by me **pukes**...but must say this is an achievement...first time buffet i din eat until i'm fully bloated....norm i'd haf trouble walking le...hehehe...shall jump to daytona now...let's c...my gear could not stay in gear 3 1...ken's steering wheel had problems...n sq mistook e brakes for e accelerator **gasps**...n imagine trying to drive when there's a car right beside ya who's bent on making ya crash..well....tat was wat happened to me...hint on e driver...black...

hmmm...lemme add on to st 2's tag...WHERE WAS SQ??!! oh no...she disappeared during the nite...**double gasp** n we din even realise!! "-holding a ruler n waving it- ladies n gentlemen..we ought to be ashamed of ourselves for not taking care of our smallest(not by age) member of our group...as apology....we will watch shutter with the little one" hmmmm....den again...mayb not..lalala..e mother's lunch was really q good wor....but it seems to point towards e hypothesis that all mamas talk e same way....sweeping statement?? hmmm...

next highlight...dinner with da4 sao3 er4 sao3!! haha...totally din expect that on e itenary...n i admit..i over-reacted to the news...zai4 zhe4 li3 zheng4 zhong4 de4 dao4 qian4...haha...it was a matter of time b4 we had to learn to interact with our sao3 zi...haha....n i couldn't agree more dat e 4 of us deciding to leave late was a v good idea...e neoprints leh..hmm...dunno la..but they were nice...hehe...i loved e natural-ness of some of e shots...lalala...n this ends my commentary of the 2 days...e end...oh ya...add 1 more pt!! nose skin start to peel le...darn...SKIN CANCER!!!

2004-12-11T23:52:00.000+08:00

hehe, dunno why..but have been putting off blogging for quite some time. NOW is the most appropriate time to blog, ain't it. allright~

what else?? stayover!! woohoo!

aftn, went marina bay to arcade and fly kite! poor yc..sprained his ankle! haha, i never touched the kite at all. cos i never have. touched a kite i mean. so i can't help in any way. haha. damn funny..all the running and kite-diving and exasperation at that. hehehe. my skirt got wet while sitting on the newspaper, which was on wet grass. haha, whatever. walked quite a distance to various toilets to change to shorts. whee. meanwhile, i think they succeeded in flying the kite for a while. whoopee! for more details, await posts from kiu, sq, ce, yc or ken. ce had to go home for cg meeting so we decided to fetch her after shutter at princess! wooo~ scary.

evening, steamboat and table bbq for dinner! hehes. erm..everyone was 7/10 full. really! haha. anyway, kinda conned cos chilli crab was too cooked and cereal prawns never appeared. prob cos we couldn't stuff any more. so..with a potong ice cream in each of our hands, we set off to bedok. but..stopped halfway to wait for bus in the end cos of yc. good oso lar..can rest. on the way we were quite bothered by the shutter movie timings but ce could not be contacted to check the timings for us! hmm..so i called cherie.......and found out there's no more shutter at princess!!! oh no!! plan foiled!! how?? cannot fetch ce le!! panic!! called her mobile and hse but no answer! in the end..we've decided to go boon lay and rent vcds first, since there's no point in going out of the way now with nothing to do at bedok, and we can contact ce anyway, later..when her cg meeting ends. so, off we go! -bop bop bop-

after an ardeous journey in the mrt..we all uds how kenny felt during all the lonely rides home. except we were not lonely. just tired. -yawn- went to prime supermarket first..bought much-needed snacks, and zoomed off to the vcd shop. while the guys bought bubble tea and the girls selected, ce called!! and i told her everything. detected a teeny weeny hint of erm..disappointment? really sorry girl! anyway, she threatened us that if we rented any horror flicks, she's not making her way here. haha, we rented the sisters anyway. together with long feng dou, stuck on you and the butterfly effect. when we're finally done, it was pouring tanks and barrels of rain! ahhhh!! how?? stranded! kenny called his mum to fetch some brollys......only to find out his brother just called for help cos he was stranded somewhere else too! ahh!! how would his mum choose now?? which son to rescue?? haha, so crappy. we waited for her in the arcade playing daytona. haha. with faulty mechanisms. anyway, she appeared not too long after...with tons of umbrellas!! to shock all of us with the amount of umbrellas they own i suppose. den she rushed off to rescue his brother. so poor thing! anyway, the adventure begins! the splashing of puddles! chionging across the road! narrowly missing the wave created by cars! braving the wind that tries to blow our umbrella away! last but not least, holding the umbrella 0.5983m further up to cross kenny's narrow gate. yay! we made it!!! celebrations! and congratulations! whee!

with wet bags, feet, pants and kite, we stepped into kenny's warm house with undue gratitude. wahhh. the shelter of a home. started to settle down and wait for our turn to bathe while playing uno stacko. den it's vcd session! first up, the sisters of cos. so that ce sees as little of it as possible. whee. it is an utterly failed horror flick to anyone who has watched shutter. serious. there are no sound effects, and the ghost appears slowly! rubbish lah. all ghosts are supposed to appear with a jolt and in split seconds. tsk tsk tsk. ce arrived as the first disc approaches an end. and she half watched half slept. who was scared lah i ask? long feng dou was slightly better, but a pity ce didn't quite appreciate it. haha, not surprising lah, it being a typical sammi cheng no-link show. no strong storyline, just alotof expenditure witnessed.

next up, monopoly!! we seem to have boundless energy don't we. do not be fooled. we're acty half dead teens who cannot bear to waste the night sleeping. haha, anyway, i was just totally stressed out by the politics of the guys. retired to let kiu take over. and..after 2 more hrs of trading, strategies, bankruptcy and jail terms, the silent sq won!! monopoly does not need overthought plans! just simple approaches! bahh!

i suggested we take a walk downstairs..but it started to rain agn! so we went up barely 10 mins after we went down. argh! nvm. we decided to watch stuck on you. like real. haha. everyone hit the sack within one hour. hehe, final positions: me, ce on ken's room floor, shivering with a blanket, ce and yc on the couch, ken on the living room floor and kiu leaning against the couch.

woke up abt 2hrs later..freshened up, had breakfast, surfed prom pics awhile, and it's the sun and the games once agn! whee! played some seriously shorthanded captain's ball for awhile, before switching to more logical badminton..where we learnt precious referee-ing frm yc, mr trotters. haha, cos of thick legs. after many rounds of intense hitting, slamming, whacking, visualising the net and even assassinating, trotters has won the championship! -alotof confetti flies!-

we went back up to bathe, and watch the final vcd, the butterfly effect. while waiting we made an award for trotter using the shuttlecock. whee. that show is damn intense man. doesn't allow for toilet breaks at all. but it's damn nice lah. had much discussions thruout the show. almost sparked off an intellectual debate abt time travel. doesn't it sound woooah. anyway, timmy called to say that if we have dinner at orchard, yizhen will join us. wow! to find out if it really happened, read on!

it's lunch!! aunty cooked us yummy lunch! curry chicken!!! tried to praise her food and oso guess wad her replies would be. we predicted her lines so accurately, we penged on the spot man. haha. ate 7/10 full agn. ohhh man. thks alot kenny! and to ur mum too! during lunch we decided to get cheryl along too. yay! the more the merrier. the guys had a different look on their faces though. tsk. ltg.

setting off to orchard! parted with ce who had to accompany her fren to church. met many interesting ppl on the train. laugh like siao. halfway, ce told us she's not meeting her fren anymore. but she said she's v tired..not joining us. haha, passed the phone down the line to persuade, or more accurately, teh~ her into joining us. in the end, she hung up on timmy. haha! so we went without her in the end..

time to find cheryl and yizhen at somerset! so yizhen came! tada! answer revealed. haha, the guys spotted cheryl first, while timmy went off to meet her somewhere and miraculously reappearing agn. so far so good :) went to bk to have dinner in the end. hehe, quite peaceful. a lil awkward to be frank. but all thks to yc! the atmosphere lightened a little. the stupid blue powder became a topic for quite some time. so stupid. anyway, we let them leave earlier in a bid to be..zi dong? hehe. anyway, i suggested to take neoprints so kiu, ken, sq and me set off to cineleisure after a while...

damn funny lah!! the photos so damn scandalous. kept laughing and laughing at them. i was so hyped up after the first that i dragged them to take a second set! haha. as anyone could have guessed, we went quite crazy after that. stupid machine had ugly decorations though. have to search very hard for items that we want. we were quite lucky in some instances. had alotof time. whee. hmm..can't wait to see the photos??? haha, i shall create an album soon! then we can see all of them to our hearts' content. quite beat now. really gotta get some sleep. really amazing, you guys. gave me the most beautiful memories of a true friendship and life. thks alot! will miss ya guys alot next yr.. :'(

2004-12-08T23:53:00.000+08:00

That's what friends are for....

And I never thought I'd feel this way
And as far as I'm concerned
I'm glad I got the chance to say
That I do believe I love you

And if I should ever go away
Well then close your eyes and try
To feel the way we do today
And then if you can remember

Keep smiling, keep shining
Knowing you can always count on me, for sure
That's what friends are for
For good times and bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
That's what friends are for

Well you came in loving me
And now there's so much more I see
And so by the way I thank you

Oh and then for the times when we're apart
Well then close your eyes and know
The words are coming from my heart
And then if you can remember

2004-12-07T22:09:00.000+08:00

prom is over. wahhh. almost as great a relief as A's itself. serious. just like for A's, you're relieved cos you know mugging is a thing of the past(at least for a while)..i'm relieved now cos i know big expenditures wun take place til a very long time in the future. preparing for prom is nerve-wrecking. good luck ce! i wonder how the pictures will turn out.

overall, the night was damn young and fun. the emcee was not boring lah, at least. quite happening throughout the whole night. and i had to stagger away with the first luckily drawn prize of the night lah..instant noodles. damn heavy lah. and what's the point? grr. felt quite sia suay. all my frens came to congratulate me. ??? whatever. why do my opinions always turn out exactly opposite of public opinion?? basically, my hair lah. i dunno WHY ppl said it's nice. i thot it was a disaster and kept praying for rain to reduce the pong-ness. until now, i stil dun think it's nice. it's just..not me lah. even my chem teacher said wah ur hair is very nice! so i was in shock the whole night. bahhh. the pageants were more of funny than anything else, meaningful for example. but i think the prom queen deserves the title. hmm..only her la. taking lotsa photos is a pain..esp when digicams give u probs..quite alotof cams nao pi qi tt nite. so ya..took up alotof time. poor james. and peiqi. taking our class photos til quite jialat. 10 odd cams la. hehe, didn't take many pics though, cos i didn't recognise anyone! i had to rely on fate to bump into my co fren, or primary sch fren, den scurrying to fish out the cam den quickly take, den move off in our diff directions agn. super unreliable. i stil think i missed out alotof co frens. but nvm. it's over!

wah. my first clubbing experience! whee. it's how song ok. WE HAD THE WHOLE BAR TO OURSELVES LEH. angel's bar or whatever. dun really rmb. at muhammed sultan. near mdm wong's. they supposedly closed early, but opened for us specially! and the age limit is only 16!! wah!!! i didn't believe my ears lah. couldn't believe my first clubbing experience can be safe until this extent. the other post-prom clubbers were stil queuing outside a bar named bar the last i saw them. muahaha. alotof clubs were closed lah. some of my class ppl went all the way to chinablack..den found out it was closed. had to detour to muhammed sultan. we went over to the overcrowded and overflowing BAR, which we felt we wun be able to go inside until like, maybe dawn, which is closing time? den went to check out mdm wong's, which is quite stupid cos ppl would have come if they could. anyway, was empty cos age limit cmi. girls 20, guys 23. saw this closed angel's bar with ppl, den went to ask, and they acty told us they could open just for us! woohoo! so that was how my ultra safe first clubbing experience went. hmm. :) but getting drunk spoils everything. tsk tsk. everyone was just crazy anyhow dancing and jumping and whatevers. haha. kena stepped many times. plus dancing on heels is..wahhh. painnnn. so i cherish my poor feet, and wore sport shoes out tdy. haha, why will someone always get stepped on during couple dances? haha, clubbing is fun! but of cos, this experience is not a realistic one. haha. real clubbing involves more caution and taking care of ur drinks and ppl. and of cos ur modesty. hmm..so will htg go clubbing one day, when we're wayyyy above age limit? -eyes atwinkle-

wow, since i've written so much, i might as well run for the longest blog entry award. haha, no lah. i need strong inspirations to do that. was just thinking, ppl always say positive thinking is just consolation from the better to the not so good. recently, paid quite alotof attn to it. like ppl alw say inner beauty is the most impt thing. ya, everyone agrees, but it is directed frm the pretty ppl to the not so pretty ppl. isn't it. or when they say grades aren't everything, it's from the clever ppl to the not so clever ppl. in such cases, is it consolation or the truth? haiz..getting ppl to tell the truth is quite a difficult thing. thus, they console. isn't it easier on the ears? besides, it makes sense and it gives them hope. so there. dunno lah, it might be all the job interviews that are making me feel this way. or the weather. anything. thinking abt it, life is really fake.

hmm, was quite down just now. family stuff. haiz. maybe i dun uds. maybe i never will. all i know is..women will never change men. that fact is there to stay till the end of time. special thks to kenny! who gave up his precious soccer to read me rant. tata! off to eat my prize..

2004-12-07T20:18:00.000+08:00

heyhey...my turn!! haha...1st thing...walao..report to duty is super nan ting!! 2nd thing..PHUA CHU KANG ROCKS!! haha... 3rd

thing...alamak...kenny ar...hokkien is like super difficult to read on blog can....haha..but it brings out e flavour though...haha...prom over le!! by tomolo nite den ce's 1 oso over le...haha....all e big hoo-ha...all over in a few hrs..just like
said on uberture...in e future chances r that no 1 will rmb wat u wore...so there was no need to spend so much and spend that
much effort..haha....but would any1 eva think this way? oh well...uploaded e pics le...hopefully e link comes out on e right hand column...din go clubbing...haha....so i'm still a non-clubber..haha...wasted opportunity...but overally i'd say that
prom was a nice experience...yepzzz...hehe...i'd neva haf gone a hairstylist n malu-ed myself or gone shopping for my own clothes if not for it...

hmmm....e ltg stayover leh....haha...typical lo...talk alot of rubbish...haha...n it is totally amazing when ya think bout it that somehow there will always be new stories la...so cool...haha...too bad i only got 30 more days of freedom le..and e
countdown continues...din realise until just now dat i got less den a mth left...n of cos e rest will get a job...social circle will widen le wor....meaning less time for meeting up even if we want to....ken(e self-acclaimed workaholic) says he's
gonna bia4 all e OTs..haha..acty if i were him i would too..so acty evry1 oso few more days of freedom le...

darn...my win media player spoilt...my com's gonna collapse anytime soon..hehe...n it seems like that's e case with many coms now...lalala...my turn to cont e countdown to e stayover...it's only 3 more days to our stayover..but i wonder wat we can do...esp at night...haha...we must for once try to plan wor...otherwise we mite end up getting bored n dunno wat to do lo...esp when supposedly there's not too much near ken's place...1stly...ecp in the noon..tat should not be too much prob rite? hmm...our bags mayb we can ask if can borrow cl's place to deposit our bags? hehe..den of cos...dinner...how?? bbq? steamboat at marina? shall start asking..oh ya...dinner is 2 sotongs..1 pig 1 blackie n 1 me..nite leh? think that is the biggest headache...vcd? rubbish talk ;) mahjong? cards? yeah...either one of these le.. yepzz....2nd day...haha...snow city...ice skate..bowling? ehhh...n it is tts all from me now..it may be e last time b4 u guys get jobs le...so ya...must make it a big success...

2004-12-07T15:04:00.000+08:00

yoyoyo! i'm at my mum's office now, trying out my dress. it's FINALLY done. blue green tube dress. ah u all will noe how it looks like when ya see the fotos i guess. i realised i'm the only one left struggling with prom stuff! argh. every1 else has been thru the whole hoo-hah le. blah. while im still here agonising over everything. i went for a facial this morn and the woman over plucked my eyebrows! wakao! now i look permanently surprised. haha ok its not dat bad la.. im just not used to it.

and oh yah, i got bad news! i have a cell grp meeting on fri nite sia. at my hse. haha.. so most prob ill go kenny's hse after that. which means ill reach at 11 plus? just in time for the gossiping to start! or wadever late nite movie! haha. im so sorry guys, didnt noe that my cell grp this wk is on fri. but in any case if y all having bbq dun forget to save some food for me! hehe. oops i have to go now, must get sequins for my dress. hai this is such a bloody hassle. wonder if i'll live to the tale.. anw, seeya on fri!!

2004-12-06T16:56:00.000+08:00

Hmmm... Juz back fr yc's hse stayover.. Feeling at shagged now.. But dun take afternoon nap de xi guan.. Slept for 5 hrs onli but not le.. As usual we played mahjong, cards, fought over the comp ( for MSN by mi n q, for game by yc), while tim (the du gui) continues to try to get us back to our 'gambling ways'. Haha.. den we off the lights n it was 'story sharing time' agn.. haiz wad else can we tok abt? haha.. mebbe this coming stayover we can try to have some serious tok? Den the nxt day q have to report to duty early (to see debbie), tim had to go see yz while yc continues his 'slping ways'. i departed for my long journey home..

Sq ur post champion for being the record longest le.. When we saw it we went "Wah!!!!!!", but understandable la.. Ye sheng ren qing de shi hou.. We will be set into our thinking mode le.. Good or bad.. Family or Frens.. Relationship or frenship.. Ci dua bu life de ming kia all come out.. But ur dreams a bit scary la.. When a person is stressed presumed he or she will have dreams de.. Juz like during the A levels i practically had dreams everyday.. insomnia.. Wadeva even mumbling in the middle of the nite (according to mom).. All the dreams r bad one.. Those days were realli realli bad..

But over le.. We have crossed the finishing line but most probably we will not be able to return back to the self dat we r before As.. Dun have the feeling of joy when As ended.. Juz a teenie weenie bit of relief.. n relief doesnt mean happiness btw.. Realli nuttin nice to rmb abt during these two yrs.. But regardless of wad these r all part n parcel of the 4 letter word haha.. (Life la)

Hmmmm... My hse qt happening now.. Got ah ma ah yi 4 of my pri sch cousins (2 boys 2 gers).. Qt noisy la.. Esp aft u r feeling shagged back home n eating ur box of rice in frnt of the tv as the 4 of them call ur name here n there.. But den i was looking at them.. thinking of the times when they were little.. I played w them too (w their toys).. Tho all they can sae is 'see see see'.. Now wad i cud do is juz ask them these qn dat qn.. Teasing them.. No more piggybacks no more farnie faces which i can still do w my oth 2 yr old cousin who is still zzzzzz in the nxt blg.. Its like i realli grow up le.. They r taking their PSLE n i am into army soon.. But den they r gg to temple w ah ma ah yi n mom le.. The temple is ling de wor.. last time ah ma ah yi n mom went n ask for nos which they won for 4D.. haha this time i asked ah ma ' li4 ai4 ki4 pai4 xin2 gia3 number ah4.. den she juz go hahahaha.. its like her garndson has grown up n start to tease her le.. The feeling was diff la i presume.. Den she will sae 'tiong4 liao4 hor3 li4 lui1.. =p Too bad in such times i will think of my dad.. absence realli makes a person's heart fonder.. Come to think of it i last tok to him over the phone on the eve of the last paper which is qt long le.. he jiayoued mi n i have not heard fr him since le.. mebbe yr end china is facing a high dd for consumer gds ba..bz schedule.. Wadeva the case this is agn the part of the si ge zi la..

Wah so much of the crap.. Hmmm so staying over coming le rite.. Congrats sq u succeeded in juz blurting everything out to ur mom n she agreed.. Shiok le 4 more days to first HTG stayover.. mebbe can start to think of wad we can do le lo.. Ce says we will go for cycling in the east in the afternoons first but tim can onli meet us at nite lo.. I was thinking mebbe ice skating in je centre? Sth new for HTG?? Any more? haha anw yt muz be in prep for her prom le n taking nice nice photos.. Muz let us see on the 10th k.. N Ce's on the 8th.. Enjoy too!!!! Mean while da jia bao zhong wor!!!! =)

2004-12-06T01:07:00.000+08:00

hmmm.. juz realised it is already 1am le..i'm tired..but decided i shall blog before i go to sleep..juz read thru many pple's blogs..den cos of wat i was chatting with kiu and yt juz now..made me tink quite abit..life after A levels is not really as nice as i tot it wud be..

now although dun hav to worry bout mugging for de exams..but still need to worry bout other things..such as finding a job..cos i need money..need money cos i wanna do de many things dat i already had in mind before de exams ended..worry bout de results dat wud be coming out in march..and how to clear my stuff..guess i hav to take 1 step at a time..

had a nightmare 2 nights ago..dreamt dat my 2 of my frens died..cried my heart out in de dream..de feeling really sucks..having to lose someone..was so glad when i woke up and realise dat it was all but a dream...really had de urge to msg de 2 pple and reassure dat they are fine..but both were abroad at dat moment..den yest..one of them msged me..today..de other 1 msged me..its a really great feeling..to knoe dat u haven lost them.. dat they are still well and living..de reassurance felt so great..=D

de nightmare set me tinking..pple always say..dreams u remember wun come true..dat's y de 1st thing i did when i woke up frm de dream was to recall who were de 2 dat died in de dreamed..cos i chose to believe dat dreams u rmb dun come true..and i was so afraid it might..things u wud do when in desperate situations..believe in supersitions? but after dat..i was tinking..if dreams u rmb were to come true.. wouldn't it be veri contradicting..wouldn't u want to rmb de sweet dreams and forget de nightmares?but if by remembering de nightmares..u wud be sure they wun come true..wud u choose to rmb them?i wud choose to rmb nightmares..cos i rather be de only 1 suffering..and i knoe they are not for real..

frankly speaking..up to now..when i tink of xianliang..i wud still cry at times..it feels so unreal..its as though we've juz lost contact with him..dat he might juz appear in front of us again..but reality is so cruel..and its when i realise it will never happen dat i start to cry..he really taught me to treasure those ard me..if i was to be granted a wish..i would wish dat those ard me wud never leave me..i hav a small request to make...to u guys..promise me u pple will take good care of urself.. and lead a happy life kz..i dun believe in promises..but i want u pple to keep tis promise..kz?i'm really scared of losing another fren..

talking bout losing a fren..reminds me of de chi phrase "sheng1 li2 si3 bie2"...ever wondered which is more painful? sheng1 li2 or si3 bie2?last time i wud hav tot dat both are equally painful..not dat i dun tink dat way now..but if i had to make a choice between de 2..i wud choose sheng1 li2..cos even though i hav to part with de person..at least i knoe he/she wud still be living somewhere on tis earth..there's still de chance dat we'll meet up again..dat de person wud still be able to bring joy to de life of others.. like he/she once brought to my life..but still..de best wud be dat i never had to be faced with dat decision...

sometimes when we quarrel..its cos we cherish de person too much..if we were not concerned with de person or cared..we wud not hav bothered to try to convince de person to understand our view..sumtimes..these quarrels are necessary..cos we often grow closer after patching up after a quarrel..wat i wanna say is..if u cherish a person..dun wanna give up de common memories u hav with de person..be prepared to put down ur pride at times..sat de magic word "sorry"..even if it is not ur fault.."sorry" may seem easy when said to a stranger..but when it is really needed in a situation..it comes out harder den it shd..but no matter how diff it is to say tat word..it shows dat u treasure de relationship..ying4 peng4 ying4 normally ends up in a situation worse den de beginning..i'm not referring to anyone in particular..i tink it is a skill we need to learn..juz voicing my views..

i tink its during night time..when it is all quiet ard..and u are feeling peaceful..dat u wud be able to tink clearly..de serenity of de night has tis effect on me..split personality ah?i can be all bubbly and noisy in de morn..but everytime it reaches tis time of de night..i can turn quite moody..and dat's when i might end up talking crap..hmmm..not sure if u pple wud agree with wat i said in tis entry..but it's my true feelings at tis pt in time..kz..take care pple! love ya guys! =)

p/s:some great news which most of u wud hav knoe..i can go for stayover! =D

2004-12-02T18:01:00.000+08:00

heyz pple! i can come online le.. ta da! found out wat's preventing me frm coming online.. din manage to solve de prob.. i juz avoided it..hehe.. doesn't matter.. i'll try to solve it when i feel like it.. anyway..really had fun on de 2 days dat we went out..finally! i could go kbox again! hehe.. sounds abit lag ah.. already dec 2 le.. but really happy we got to go kbox dat day.. really mark de end of our long and dreadful mugging period..so fast! i've been rotting at home for a week le..din really do much at home..hehe.. time to buck up and start packing my stuff or look for a job.. time waits for no one.. sigh!

today is VJ's prom wor..bet de 2 guys wud hav a good time looking at all de chio bus today..=p talking bout prom..reminds me bout how we went ard looking for their prom attire on fri and sat..wahz..after those 2 days..orchard sounds de same as A levels to me..scary..tink i wud hav de phobia of going orchard for quite some time le..but i wun mind if u guys are willing to go there and look at x'mas lightings with me.. hehe..i still wanna watch shutter! argh! heard so many comments bout it... and its all good comments! nvm..i'll wait..i'm sure i'll get to watch it somehow..

next week is TJ's and HC's prom wor..it'll be de gals turn!after dat.. it's de long awaited stayover..which i haven ask my parents about..hehe..oops..=p anyway.. hope those going prom or are already at prom hav a great time.. and take lotsa pics kz..so dat u all can show us..den we can share ur joy too..dat's all i got to say.. tataz! =)

p/s:taufik won singapore idol! expected outcome..but i wud hav been happier if it was sylvester who won.. and de songs they sang were nice! i like "i dream" and "that's wat frens are for".. can consider using "tat's wat frens are for" as our blog song leh..suits us perfectly!

2004-11-27T22:50:00.000+08:00

hiya guys just wanna thank u guys for today! i wanna apologize cos i noe we didnt really get to enjoy ourselves much cos i had to rush around getting presents which now reflecting back is really dumb shld haf done it myself another day so i'm really really sorry. but i'm really v grateful that u all were there to help me calm my nerves a bit. i wished my bdae was a little less hectic but hehe the busyness aint gonna let up for a few days so oh well. ur company meant a lot to me! hehe. love u guys! looking forward to our next outing again! =)

2004-11-26T21:45:00.000+08:00

Arrr….it’s finally e end of e As….that arrrr was supposed to be a declaration of liberalization….or being set free from the clutches of the evil that was simply so overwhelming….but rite since the morning….somehow that shout to release the accumulated pressures n helplessness simply did not come out…..was it like as sq said cos it happened over such a long time dat e joy of freedom was slowly eroded as we got nearer to e day of freedom slowly n bit by bit….somehow I dunno…deep down it felt like the whole ordeal was so deeply entrenched within myself dat it won’t go away….yday I tried to recall when this strong experience started to accumulate within myself…..but somehow i just could not recall when it acty all started…..it seemed such a long long time ago….n that since that seemingly distant past….i had no idea wat I was leading my life for……do u call it studying? But ain’t studying supposed to mean gaining something from it…learning from it…..thinking bout it now….i dun find I’ve learnt anything…u learn all e facts…but do u seriously understand wat is going on behind the facts? Mugging all the tys…hoping for a somewhat similar qn to come out…task of activity…. Remembering how to solve the same qn…not to know how to solve the qn…probably the reason y this yr so many of e papers came up with inventive qns…but no matter wat any1 says....evry1 still wants that big 1st letter of e alphabet…a big fat A….wat is A supposed to represent….Achievement? seems so…but to spend a whole yr on nth but studying 4 syllabuses over n over again….n of which we mite jolly be told in e future…nonono…they r not true…achievement? Seems more like being made an ass…we term ourselves the top 5 jcs in Singapore…we exchange this placing with the 6mths that we put into mugging….the other schools mite not do so well in terms of final grades…..but mayb during those 6mths they’ve led much more meaningful lives…n with plenty of As we get into uni…with a BBC or even lower others oso climb onto the next stage….so who’s the loser in the end? But guess it’s just like saying a manager hu works for 12hrs for a higher pay n a roadside stall owner leading a much flexible life for a lowe pay….but y e heck did I choose to go for the 1st option? Man’s ego…competition to show superiority….wonder if there will eva come a day when I can lose this inborn nature of humans….

Thinking bout e whole A level experience now thou…learnt a valuable lesson…at least for e time being…simplicity is really e way to lead ur life….pple always say…get into uni can le….etc etc…I’m sure u need 3As or 4As to get into uni…on the bus journey home….finally enlightened abit on how I should face the results of the exam….S papers dun matter anymore….at least I’ve managed to put my mind to understanding in depth into the stuff that we learn…highly probable that I’m writing all this rubbish cos I din do as well as I could…n sulking away….but hopefully from today onwards…I can constantly remind myself…it doesn’t matter wat eva grade it is when march comes ard…just go on to the next level…at sec 4 n jc2 I’ve already lead a total of 12 mths without knowing wat I was doing at all….it will be dumb for me to mourn over not getting plenty of As….if I ever moan on my exams eva again ….pls shut me up…

2004-11-26T20:25:00.000+08:00

The Day Before Tomorrow:

Morning --- Wakes at 7 15 am, all ready to go onto the battlefield (a.k.a. St.Wilfred Sports Complex). Arrived there at 8 30 am to find the sky dark and gloomy. First time dhs ppl arrived in greater numbers earlier then the maris ppl, cos we are always late for matches. Went on the field to warm up, but the rain started to pour and cooled us down instead. Referee was nowhere to be seen. 9 am, referee stays unseen. 9 15 am, referee still unseen. Called him and he said he was arriving as he isn't familiar with the place. 9 30 am, referee slowly wades in, in shiny purple t-shirt. Rain subsided a bit. Match started. It went smooth and both sides were equally matched, although there were few shots unleashed. 1st shot on target came from maris team, scared the shit out of me, but luckily our keeper Tze Yang managed to get hold of it. 2nd shot on target came from dhs team, and Jason scored, lobbing the out-of-position keeper from just inside the penalty box, precisely assisted by Alan. DHS 1-0 MARIS. 1st half ended with not much excitement from both sides. 2nd half starts. Match went on smooth, and dhs team startin to pressurize the maris team with more attacks. Suddenly, Wen Guang went down with a push from the maris team in the penalty box. He was hit in the face and his nose was bleeding. Substitutions were made and the referee calls for a penalty. Elleri steps up for the shot and calmly slots it past the keeper into the bottom right corner of the goal. DHS 2-0 MARIS. Match went on with the maris team being pressurized, unable to attack and only able to squeeze a few shots through. At around 20 mins left to full time, Brian acrobatically brought the ball past 2 defenders, with the ball bouncin back and hitting himself twice, he managed to get himself some space and he unleashed a half-volley right at the edge of the penalty box and scored a third for the dhs team. DHS 3-0 MARIS. In the last 15 mins, the maris team went 'gung-ho' or all-out-attack, placing 3 strikers up front. A ball was nicely lobbed into our penalty area by the maris playmaker. The defence was in chaos. Tze Yang, our keeper, managed to get a hand on the ball but it slipped (as it had by then began to rain). The ball fell right into the path of a maris striker and he slots the ball into the net. Fatal error. DHS 3-1 MARIS. Soon, the final whistle was blown. After bathin and cleanin up, i went with some of the guys to have lunch at plaza singapura. (Weather: rainy, Feeling: sunny)
Afternoon --- Went down to chinatown to people's park with keng yang, brian and one other guy from my jc class. Made full payment for the Taiwan backpacking trip from 13th to 21st Dec. Tried to draw $369 from the ATM machine at the shoppin complex for the payment but apparently the ATM ran out of cash (I'm afraid capital flight might occur for POSB haha). Real excited about the trip, but somehow, it had to clash with cheryl's birthday which is on 20th Dec. However, i've already tot of wat to do to at least try to make up for my absence. Hehe. The guys are tired and decides to go home. Made my way down to Orchard to meet you ppl. Shopped for prom clothes and finally managed to spot something that i like. Hope to be able to buy it. Called and told cheryl (who's in Orchard too) about the clothes i saw and she said she wanted to see it. But i told her i'll show her when i bought it as im tired and feel like going home. (Weather: drizzling, Feeling: sunny)
Early Evening --- Decided to eat dinner at yoshinoya with u ppl. After dinner, as we were headin to mrt on our way home, mom called to ask me to buy dinner back for my bro. Told her the coffeeshop near my house won't be on my way but she insisted i go buy. Suddenly, kenny (i think) tapped me on the shoulder and i heard jeremy telling me, "hey! ur lao po! ur lao po! u dun even recognise her?" I guess it was bcos i was busy debating with my mum on the phone. I was surprised and a turned around to look for her. Spotted her but she continued walkin with her friend although she saw me too. I ran back for her and when i caught up with her, the first thing she did was to smirk and said, sounding pissed, "Tot u going home? Then what u still doing here?" Told her tat i was eating dinner before going home but she said, "Then tot just now u told me u were going home already?" We were standing in the middle of the moving Wisma crowd so i decided not to debate with her about the issue. What did i do wrong? I just said bye, turned and left. (Weather: no longer rainin, Feeling: rainy)
Late Evening --- Cheryl msged to apologize. Felt better and i told her i was sorry not to tell her that i was gonna eat dinner before i go home. Finally reached Punggol mrt station. Had to go off-route to buy my brother's dinner. (Weather: dark?, Feeling: better den b4)
Night --- Eventually reached home at around 8 05 pm. Went to take a shower and felt so much better already. Turned on the com and blogged. (Weather: no idea, havent looked out the window, Feelin: sunny)

2004-11-24T23:27:00.000+08:00

hey pple.. tml marks de end of A levels for 5 of us..2nd last paper for kiu.. jia you wor! it'll be over soon! tink most pple looking forward to it le.. i was too.. on monday after econs paper.. though never finish.. but it din feel as terrible.. really sad today.. acty dun tink de phys paper 3 was de main culprit.. but i guess it is de main cause of sadness.. supposed to be studying for my design paper now.. used to tink dat 16/310 is nothing.. but after losing 12 marks today.. 16 marks seems to matter alot... wanted to study... but in de end.. came online before i finish reading 5 pages... haiz..

was tinking y i acty feel so sad.. den found a few possible reasons.. 1stly.. cos it is A levels.. no 2nd chance le.. 2ndly.. its a phys paper.. dun ever recall not being able to finish a phys paper.. 3rdly.. i could hav done better.. if only i put in abit more effort.. 4thly.. can't help but feel dat i've let down some wonderful phys tutors dat hav taught me... okie.. those are reasons related to phys...

reasons not related to phys.. maybe i'm really stressed like some of my frens said.. den today felt like de day of liberation.. den everything juz overflowed.. emotions not within control le.. another reason could be cos of some pple.. i tot it thru le.. but never found de courage to do wat i wanna do.. been telling myself since 3 weeks ago.. dat i'll ren3.. wait till de A levels are over.. den i'll settle de other matters.. tml is de last paper le.. means i've no worries bout studies le.. means dun hav to worry it'll affect pple's studies le.. hopefully i'll find de courage within me to tell de person straight in de face... i've had enough!

haha.. guess it wun make much sense to ltg.. but i tink stg will knoe wat i'm talking bout.. nvm.. if i succeed.. u pple will de 1st to knoe.. cos its u pple who hav been there thru de toughest period i've ever came across in my 18 yrs of life..

lastly... good luck to yc and kenny for ur bio mcq... hehe.. dun tink u will get to see b4 de paper.. den to de rest of us.. jia you ba.. design paper left le.. get it over.. and we're done with A levels! =)

2004-11-22T22:05:00.000+08:00

i finished my papers le! hehe. tho i just realised today that i mite become even busier cos of all the church events dat's gonna come up. the jc ppl in my church are gonna put up a dance and drama item on dec 13, gonna be qt pro one.. and the dance will be done by urs truly. so pls come and support me if u can ok? haha thanx.. sigh i do wish i can get well soon in a few days so that i can sing like mad on sat. my throat feels like some kinda war zone rite now. got painful explosions going on everytime i try to swallow something. muz get well!! hehe. so my plans for celebration these few days are completedly called off. ill stay at home to rest and preserve my energy so dat can go crazy with u guys on sat.. haha. but it feels damn good. as in, just lazing ard at home and doing wadeva i wan with my time...

ok im continuing this post one day later cos last nite couldnt finish. my eyes are swollen!! arrghh. allergic reaction to yet another family of painkillers called ponstan. im totally sian diao. been cooped up in e hse for 2 days le. haha but i've managed to clear all my notes from my desk and shelf and i've nv seen so much space on my desk before. ever. its really therapeutic i tell u, throwing away piles and piles of foolscap paper. makes u wonder how many trees u've killed in 2 yrs. whooa. but u guys shld do it immediately after the exam. really. it gives u an immense sense of satisfaction. muahaha. sigh can't wait for u all to finish ur papers... i wanna go out! i wanna go gym!! grrrr. sigh. i forgot wad was my point in blogging le. so as u can see i've managed to churn out 2 paras of pure crap. and whining. oh yah!! haha stayover!! haha can we haf a healthy stayover? like with low cal food and exercise? okokok dun yell at me.. jokin jokin.. but seriously can we haf steamboat instead of bbq? hahahha. i've nv liked the hassle of a bbq anw.. at a steamboat, everyone muz cook! haha. but i realised we all participate at the bbq cos we alw hang ard the pit.. erhh but acty, not very realistic hor? we mite end up paying much more.. haha. we muz rent lots and lots of vcds! ok prob not dat much. and u guys def wld rent horror films one rite? dowan can? haha.. scream too much wake up ken's family how? we wld all nid to scream into cushions then.. like i do when i get up to watch late nite soccer matches. poor cushion.

hmm mahjong... i dun mind bringing la. but u guys wanna stay at ken's hse the whole day? shall we go cycling? hehe. a bit far hor.. haha let's go fly kite at marina south!! den after dat go steamboat! or go k box again? shucks i really dunno leh... haha. let's start a discussion here k? every1 give suggestions!

2004-11-22T17:35:00.000+08:00

Yo yc... knew u so long le... first time hear u worry abt sth so far... Dun worry la... Ah q is rite... Live the moment now... Worry abt others later... Though there r things we have to think properly but not now... We have alr slogged so hard for a few mths le... Its time to do some things dat we alw wanted to do... Anw it oso means u have grown up n matured le... Worrying abt so many things... Hmmm not say u r v childish in the past la... But u realli r the kai xin guo in HTG... Never fails to bring joy n laffter to HTG... Cont to do so okie? Think betta things... like diyao's testimonial match on fri?? haha...

Hmmm yt ah... ur list really v long la... now As not over u have 30 le... Den aft As how? 300 ah? haha... Ya we realli can have many other things in mind le after As besides the 300 pts of bio or econs? Possible to memorise so much? Impossible ah...

Haha... Will make sure i can make my hse free for 10 dec... Hmmm but first lets settle some things... Ermz u all want the bbq during the first nite? Den eh muz oso decide hu to bring mahjong n cards... Den still got wad? The vcds u all wanna watch? Friends?? Hmmm muz at least make a list lo... If want bbq eh on dat day we meet to go jp ntuc n buy the things la... No need for a food list... Hmmm any other things??
Sq so excited haha... try to convince ur mom but juz tell her the truth lo... I dun mind u gals gif ur parents my home no. if it means more assurance to them (67956809)
If they still not fang xin... Can gif them my add la.. (Blk 232 Westwood Ave #06-29 S648360) Think can le la... I dun think all ur parents r so cruel to u all la...

Hmm okie la... Thurs shall be our last paper! Jia u for the last time!

2004-11-21T11:44:00.000+08:00

wow let st3 complete the erm..posting. have to be in order mah. haha why are you all so hyper? dying already. feels so long..but yet no time! we're living in a paradox. -gasp- anyway sq, that was a quote from all the A levels survivors. aka..all our seniors.

let me actually list down wad i wanna do after A's. from short-term to long-term.
1. shop.
2. shop for shoes.
3. shop for bag.
4. shop for accessories.
5. shop for earring making supplies.
6. shop for 6 hrs non-stop.
7. dye hair. purple!
8. get hair treatment.
9. mani and pedi.
10. face, skin and body care.
11. watch polar express.
12. watch forgotten.
13. rent a cart and sell earrings..wahaha.
14. prom!!!
15. swim everyday!
16. spend a day at the beach.
17. camp at sky garden. haha! we finally can.
18. stayover.
19. blog.
20. revamp blog.
21. get gmail.
22. use gmail.
23. kboxxxxxx til i drop.
24. WORK.
25. learn korean.
26. learn self-defense.
27. learn drums.
28. learn cooking.
29. revamp wardrobe.
30. get digicam!

haha, i'll just stop at 30 first. i bet alot slipped my mind. and..way to go, yc! first post! hmm..it's good to see a troubled side of you for once..to let us know u're normal teens like us. dun have to present happy-go-luckiness 24/7. we'll always be here for each other! cheers. good luck for all the remaining papers! :)

2004-11-20T13:56:00.000+08:00

man i swear it snowed in S'pore last nite.. noe why? cos yc blogged!! hahahaha.. ok fine not funny sorry. and who am i to suan him when i haven blogged for some time too? hehe. but seriously yc u shld blog more! haha. and who says there's no censorship on this blog? i'm the censor! at least haf some decency to use asterisks rite? haha ok la if u werent in a bad mood i guessed u wun haf cursed too.. oh well cheer up As are ending soon!! final leg of the race! after this arduous task we can finally get on wif our lives. and what we really wanna do.. i noe the guys haf NS and they spent half their time together bitching abt wad's to come (and the other half about soccer) but seriously, as much as most guys love to curse and swear when they're toking abt NS, i tink deep down most acty enjoy the experience... i mean, so many seniors come back and share their wacky stories and they get along damn well with their platoon mates.. its sorta become an integral part of a S'porean male's life rite? so if u cant beat them, join them! haha... i'm sure u guys wld come out having lots to tell.. haha.. so... dun dread it so much la..

ahh freak. i gtg... sorry cant blog so much... seeya guys!!

2004-11-20T01:09:00.000+08:00

ooh.. juz read yc's post.. u quite unlucky leh.. kena drenched in de rain.. muz take care wor.. A levels gonna be over soon... muz not fall sick! if not how to enjoy after de torment is over?! =P

relax boy! it's never too late for de 1st post in de blog.. =) htg is a bunch of easily contented pple.. veri happy dat u blog lor.. nobody will blame u for taking so long to post de 1st entry 1.. i bet de rest will agree with me.. right?! that's wat frenship is bout.. and wat htg is built on!

yeah... we hav been leading a "no life" life for 3 months! how long is dat! how pathetic can we get?!?!? but nvm... 6 more days! jia you pple! once we get over tis.. nothing we can't overcome!(quote frm yt.. hehe... she juz told me tis today! in tm.. outside some shop) i wanna do so many things after de A levels.. go kbox! watch movie.. i wanna watch shutter! argh! and i'm so looking forward to stayover at kenny's hse! can't wait for 10 dec! de 1st htg stayover... tink i shd be able to go.. i will fight for it!

hehe.. yeah! really love u guys! juz like yc do... not trying to be crappy wor... really mean it.. u guys are de best le.. irreplacable le! =D hey yc.. can always share ur unhappiness with us wor.. juz pour it all out on tis blog if u dun wanna say it face to face.. sorrow shared is halved.. happiness shared is double! yeah?! see de title of de blog.. we'll be there for u!

kkz.. take care everyone! really had a great time today.. really grateful to u guys... bringing laughter during tis period of high stress level.. helps alot wor.. hoped u guys felt destressed too.. dat's all for now.. we'll be back soon! jia you! we are almost done with it! =)

2004-11-20T00:00:00.000+08:00

Wonder if there's any censorship on this thing... man i feel so fucked up now, dunno why also... juz feel like screwin myself around... sheesh... good times, bad times... kinda guess everyone's stressed up now... but i can feel tat im being vexed by something tats not related to studies.
Sorry peeps, had to start on this blog with something tats so "not nice" to hear. Well, we've come a long way being friends, a total of bout 4 years already? This is like how long since the blog started uh? and its my 1st post, haha i feel so ashamed.
Was drenched when i got home earlier, runnin in the rain all the way from bus stop to my house. Haha, lucky never catch a cold. Why did kiw haf to get d/c in the midst of me sendin him such a big file!!! ARGH! Haha, sigh, guess he not fated to get the file from me.
Remembering the good ol'days now, feelin abit happier from what im feelin just now, haha. Remembering how i got to know each and everyone of u, remembering the good fun times we had, remembering the ordeals (a.k.a. o'levels) we pulled tru. Just now shuqin told me on the bus that the last time we really had fun was on 28 Aug (day neoprint was taken), and on kenny's birthday. Reminded me tat it was bout 3 months ago already. Time really flies. Was tellin jeremy on the bus tat soon we will be leavin army, entering universities, leaving universities... and he shut me up... Haha, told me to focus on what's happenin now, and all he's gonna think bout is the 40 days after exams, all the way to army time. Haha, i guess he's kinda right. Focus on what u have now, focus on what you are doing now. No one know's what will happen in the future, no one knows where our path would take us in the future, but what we know is that we have to make a choice now, on whether to take the left, or the right path. We pave our own future, we make our own fate.
Hmmm, i guess tats all i wanted to say la, nothin much oso, haha. O well, see ya all soon! All the best for the remainin papers~ and, hope i can sleep tonight. haha love ya all! =)

2004-11-07T17:32:00.000+08:00

wahaha.. de stress is getting ard! wondering y i'm here? to destress for a while lor.. if i dun come online.. i'll probably waste more time.. cos i'll be sleeping.. talking bout nap.. so guilty! slept frm 3+ to 7 yesterday! in de end din finish my target for yest..

anw.. de main thing i wanna say is..

Good Luck Everyone!

we are nearing de real thing.. but it also means we are nearing our hols..

Jia You!

we'll overcome tis together.. den we'll enjoy ourselves.. kkz? :) i'm already tinking bout de time when we can play our hearts out.. let's keep dat in mind as our motivation.. looking forward to our stayover.. =P

2004-11-06T16:19:00.000+08:00

Wah... Long time never blog le...Yeah sorry its realli my fault... Too pia le... Okay guess i muz somehow get a breather... Health n rest more impt den everything rite? Haha... Hmmm lucky my bro juz succesfully 'revive' pour near to 8 yrs comp... I admit he's a rea pro when it comes to comp... Salute to him man... Or else realli have to spend on a new comp le tho i think its time we get a new one...

Hmmm... Juz read the post by kiu... n the return post by yt n sq... Den i suddenly tot of writing sth... Kong xu gan ah... I guess we realli have to live w it... Its part n parcel of our 60 70 80 yrs of life? Actually the reason for such a feeling i think is the cohesive nature of humans ba... Ask us to live alone, survive alone, eat alone... No one wud like to obey those intructions... Even in long long time ago, primitive man caveman live together with different pple resp for diff jobs like hunting and taking care of children... Mebbe dats y we have formation of couples... They marry to live together... Exp the companionship den aft which they will start a family to each have their own roles,,, Hmmm... My point is all these are predetermined paths of life... The reason for the kong xu is the because we havent satisfy life as the way it suppused to be ie find our life partners... But guys n gals rest assured we will find the one... The right one... Bear w the kong xu for a little while more...

The right one... Hmmmm... Dats diff if we think of it... Hence we exp so many relationships... Of cos we all go into one thinking dat he or she is ur first n ur last... I wud definely wanna find one is a good girlfriend a good wife a good mom... Pple say its diff to find but i say its doable... Thus i think we all should sit n think... Dun be rushed by ur 'kong xu' to get urself one n in the end live to regret... But most imptly at the same time, if u think he or she is the rite one... Dun hesitate... HehHeh... but seems like the phrase 'juz go for it' is easily said to someone who ask u abt whether to woo a person than carrying out ourslef... Haiz............ Humans ah... Plus so many other things to factor in...=( Mebbe 'dun think too much' is yet again another phrase dat we will tell pple but so diff to do it ourselves... Hmmm so bottomline is there is no bottomline... It still all depend on oneslf... Diff pple cope w kong xu differently... Diff pple get into diff no of relationships... Dn diff pple like diff pple... No one is the same... So lets not look at other pple n impose wad they are doing or experiencing on ourselves ba... Go w our feelings n behave like thyself...

To those who r happily in a relationship: Continue it dat way ad may it be ur last relationship
To those who do not have any: Continuing searching to overcome such kong xu

Lasty to all A level students: Jia You ba... The end of the tunnel is approaching aft which we will see the light... Plus the colours of life dat we once possess and cherished so much! =)

2004-11-05T23:40:00.000+08:00

wah. i finally have relevant points to talk abt this topic. after looking out my window. haha, bedok central never lacks news. tho my window is so small..saw 2 couples in my view once i looked out. one walking, one on bicycle. haha, so romantic rite? or so we thought. the typical scene man..jingjing and xiaoxin cycling thru the nite..with only each other as company and moonlight as their guide. then! .............. a bicycle slope appears. bah! u think. shhh! listen! the steepness, unfortunately, is designed such that a small amt of struggle by an average cyclist will be sufficient to overcome it. stil rmb there's a mesmerized girlfriend on the bike too? haha, boyfriend struggles! alot! rides with all his might to pedal as hard as he could..to not much use. alas, in the end, he dismounted from his bike (oops, is this a repetitive expression) and pushed it with his dreamy-faced girl along. -zong yi da ge da tune plays- sigh, the anti-climax of a supposedly most memorable date..the fantasy of the ride crushed by the practicality of physics.

anw, relating back to the posts, guess it's not kong xu ba..more like the sense of self-consciousness we feel when we realise we're different from the ppl we see. like, i feel that i'm lacking of sthg whenever...for eg...i see a digicam(see my blog. heehee). u know. or when u dun fit the dress code. in other words, when u stand out from the rest! haha, an exaggeration, i know. population who are attached shd be 50% ba..from what i see now. we're just on the other side of the line. anyway, knowing that there's definitely a person who will share ur unhappiness is quite miles apart from whether u would really share it. so, in the end..just an illusion? -shrugs- moreover, the attached status comes with the constant reminder of discretion when interacting with the opposite sex. quite a nag sometimes. ah well. still..better to have been loved and hurt than not have it at all. a kind of life experience mah. ppl are stubborn creatures..dun believe the things ppl say until they experience it themselves..find out for themselves how true they really are. well..blame it all on the destabilizing nature of relationships..

sigh..stayover how..

2004-11-05T13:25:00.000+08:00

eh.. i can blog again! dunno wat's wrong.. juz sth.. my IE really AP.. haha.. anyway.. i juz wondering leh.. is it me or is de total number of posts for our blog stagnant at 156? tink i'll find out de ans soon after i finish typing tis post..hmmm.. promised kiu say i wud type sth in response to his post.. but din find de inspiration.. let's hope i'll find some inspiration as i type tis.. oh wow.. i juz talked a whole paragraph of crap..

hmm.. i knoe de feeling! de kong1 xu1 feeling... when u see ur frens happily together as a couple.. but den tink on de bright side.. being single is not dat terrible.. at least we hav de freedom.. to do watever we want.. no need to be responsible to anyone.. no burden of relationship.. and i believes frenships last longer de relationship... so acty if given a choice.. i wun want to develop a relationship with my really close frens.. cos i fear de day when we will breakup.. den frenship ruined also.. not worth it.. but of cos there's de benefits of being in a relationship also lor.. it's always comforting to know dat there is tis person whom u can depend on when u meet with unhappy stuffs..

there's always 2 sides to everything.. aiya.. realised everything really boil down to our choice.. which is acty quite pathetic leh.. cos one wrong choice made.. and it will trigger off a chain effect.. cos de following actions wud all be dependent on de initial choice made.. does tis remind u pple of anything?! haha.. kkz.. dun worry.. i wun elaborate on it.. it's over.. not up to be to decide my own fate.. leave it to de markers ba.. hope for de best.. prepared for de worst..

next paper is chemistry.. and i haven finish studying de notes yet.. wat am i doing here?! argh.. tink i'll go hav my lunch.. den back to food chem notes.. aim is to finish them by today.. jia you pple! =D

p/s: sigh.. it's raining again! nice weather to slack.. and it never fails to remind me of chalets, pple and events.. i want my hols!

2004-11-01T01:18:00.000+08:00

heyz pple.. tis entry is not by me.. it's by courtesy of mr kiu.. i'm juz helping him to post it.. cos he feels dat it is lame.. but i feel dat it is ok.. and typical stuff dat we always tok bout.. yupz.. and according to him.. it is an incomplete post.. so let's hope he will complete it.. yeah? here goes..

hehe....xing1 xue4 lai2 chao2...haha.....it seems like when eva i stay up till e wee hrs....some chattting online and e tranquil environment neva ceases to stir up some weird tots in me....from outta nowhere some more....haha....imagine pple studying now but i dunno doing wat rubbish now....complacency!!! hmmmm....acty got wat to complacent about...haha....oh well....shall make this a shorter entry den e last 1...

hehehehe....mayb these tots had slowly begun to build since i saw my bill this mth and saw the low sms rates this mth....haha....barely ten a day on average...hmmm...angel finds this alot....haha....oh well...e pt is got a thousand but spend so little only...haha....and well....chatting with happy pple hu r living in bliss...haha....seems pretty much ironic tat u're happy for them but at e same time u discover a kong1 xu1 feeling that haf not surfaced since ages ago b4....hmmm...always chose to believe that be enriching urself in other manners...be it in making more friends or by learning new things...hehe...mayb by studying...that u will be able to fill up the gaps or feelings of emptiness...seriously speaking...is that a matured way of thinking....or a childish way of thinking? ain't too sure of that ans myself....an even bigger pt is that we r only students...not exposed to the societal demands of work n perhaps social liabilties....and as perceived by adults as being too greenhorn to uds wat eva rubbish we r thinking is really rubbish....

2004-10-22T23:16:00.000+08:00

hmmm.. shd update wor.. in case we all hav amnesia in future... and dun forget dat we ever went to kiu's hse to mug on 21 oct 2004! haha.. kkz... so now we'll all rmb... as long as tis blog stays.. we went kiu's hse to mug yest! tink his mama had a shock when stg went 1st.. 3 gals going his hse.. den luckily kenny came.. but still... we had to speak in english.. better still... standard and cheem english... so dat both his mum and bro wun understand..

haha.. wanted to wreck havoc in his kitchen by cooking our own instant noodles for dinner... but in de end... his mama took over.. mission failed... maybe we'll try again... but when his mum is not at home... lesson learnt.. cooking mission wud never be successful when de owner of de kitchen is at home.. anyway... had ice cream for dessert! wahz.. still tink dat's de best dessert.. never fails to give me a sense of satisfaction.. =)

hehe.. now having mass chat with kiu and yt.. topics really go frm 1 to another.. started with chalet.. now discussing bout wu zong xian... conclusion.. he's quite ke lian.. and u knoe wat.. within a min... we switched back to discussion on chalet again... tis is htg.. never run out of topics for discussion... good point of ours... applause! *clap clap clap*

aiya... wanted to blog for a reason 1... but now i forgot wat was de main thing i wanted to say... kkz... know wat u guys are tinking.. so typical of me... nothing to be amazed bout.. but u knoe... it gets veri irritating when u forget wat u wanna blog bout.. eh.. really dun remember le.. but it was supposed to be sth more impt den all de crap i juz said.. aiya.. forget it.. next time ba..

study hard pple! if not kenny gong gong will nag at us to be yong4 gong1..... =p see ya pple soon! in case i forget.. to timothy, kiu, yt... good luck for phys prac on monday! =)

2004-10-19T16:38:00.000+08:00

wahz.. u wun believe tis.. i typed a whole entry and its gone.. now i have to retype it all over again.. kz.. shall skip some of de non-impt part.. anyway.. yest was tj's farewell ceremony... kz.. did feel sad at some point of time... especially during de concerts.. all de singing performances manged to bring tears into my eyes.. but i never cry.. cos i can't..

kkz.. in response to kiu's post.. it's a perception prob.. it has always been tis way since a long long time ago.. guys are viewed to be stronger... and less emotional... of cos dat's not always true.. and i have seen exceptional cases myself.. u are probably 1 exceptional case urself... hehe... =p but i tink 1 thing most gals wud agree wud be dat although we view u guys to be emotionally stronger.. we will still welcome u pple to let down ur guard and be emotional in front of us.. we dun mind being dat pillar of support in times when u need it.. cos we understand de fact dat u are juz human.. and hav times when u will feel down too..

eh.. as i was reading thru kiu's entry ah... i tink i'm really more of a guy den a gal leh.. cos de things he say ah.. although mostly against gals.. i agree with him leh... i never tot dat it was anyone's fault if he happens to like 2 gals at de same time.. it juz means dat he is confused bout wat he wants himself.. not his fault.. no one can be clear bout his own goals all de time.. and i believe dat as time goes by.. he will come to realise wat is it dat he really wants.. tink wat pple can't accept is de fact dat he will end up hurting 1 party.. anyway... guys dun hav to put up with de wu2 li3 qu3 nao4 of gals all de time... not even if de gal is his gf and he likes her alot.. shd not zong4 rong2 de incorrect behaviour.. cannot always give in all de time.. hav abit more say in ur own lives! u dun belong to ur bf/gf... u can choose ur own frens and lead ur own lives..

haha.. i seems over agitated wor.. but aiya... sometimes see de guys ard me ah.. more of de victims.. are good guys meant to be bullied? poor thing lor.. but as usual.. we often dun cherish de pple ard us until they have left us.. and tis is de most impt lesson dat i've learnt tis yr.. all i want now.. is for those close to my heart to be happy... and that include U! yes u.. htg.. =)

let's jia you! A levels gonna come and go as a breeze for us ... yeah? =P

2004-10-17T22:49:00.000+08:00

wahh..really impressed by kiu. this teaches us that when the lao hu bu fa wei, bu yao ba ta dang bing mao! he has convinced me that i belong to the more understanding group of the female species. hahaha. yay. i have never called a guy a jerk, nor have i claimed to be in a state of psychological distress, cos i know and i tell ppl that i'm just plain pissed. ok, enough of myself.

ya i really agree with him. maybe it's cos all the guys i've met are good. but sometimes seeing them get bullied by girls whom i deem totally unworthy is quite sad. sigh. affecting their results and all. but when everything's cleared up they're so happy agn, like the prev few days were gone with the wind. sigh, guys are so simple sometimes. what an endearing quality. it seems to me that girls get very affected by unhappiness in the r/s, but it's the guys who are really shattered by an end of a r/s. this shows that guys cry too..no matter who initiated the breakup. just as it is hard to accept one, it may even be harder to initiate one. trying to leave someone who has become part of your life..can it ever be easy?

suddenly had deja vu while typing this..maybe i'd rehearsed this in my dreams before. haha. but well, guys or girls alike, we all have feelings and the only impt thing is to let go when u have to. sometimes it is not impt who's the jerk or who's the bitch. if we really uds the person, we'd know what's behind all the unhappiness. maybe they're in their darkest hour, and they need support. or they are indeed trying to break up..in a more subtle way. no one will hurt another person for no reason.

ok, such a post is sure uncomparable in terms of length to kiu's lah. but easier to digest perhaps :p acty i wanted to blog abt sthg else but i forgot. nvm! oh yea..notice the philosophical face of htg blog is back? :)

2004-10-17T02:15:00.000+08:00

lalala....just played soccer for SO LONG just now man...suffering from effects of dehydration le...headache...n betta news...my toe is swollen...again....tonite nobody online xia...well...not evry1 is like me...haha...supposed to be doing econs mcq but....giving myself all the excuses in the world not to do...

suddenly got some gan2 chu4s so decided to blog...(eehhh...if at some pt in time this post evokes emotions of rebuttal...pls do not hesitate to stop reading)today angel told me bout her being pissed off with her guy friend whom sorta told her he like this gal now but still has some feelings for erm...a previous gal...hope ce can uds...haha....den my angel erm...gave her all guys r jerks verdict...cos it seemed like he likes 2 gals at the same time...n that just sparked 2 tots in my mind...firstly...is it really that sinful to at the same time like 2 person? isn't it human nature to be unsure of your true feelings for people at some point in time? and it doesn't always apply to guys only right? but e pt is why is it it is always the male counterpart of humans being attacked?? if a guy is unsure of who he exactly likes n actually speaks out his mind...e reaction incurred always seems to be attacking the guy for being frivolous(correct word not ar?) or smt of that sorts....n e other parties involved seem to always find it no problem to just accuse the guy of being erm....not being dedicated...and they haf evry right to pressure the guy to make a choice...conversely when the same situation happens for a gal...it seems that the guys involved haf to just bear with it and wait patiently...n agonisingly for the gal to make up her mind...if she eva does so....n it seems like she is the one that is in erm...psychological distress...n treated more like "the victim" in a sense...aren't the guys who are waiting supposed to be the victims to a ficke-minded person that they so happen to like? n the guys simply haf to either walk away in sorrow or just wait like dumb dorks(hmmm...not a v nice word)? think most us(eehh..our age 1 la...) haf been some pt in time a sorta counsellor to other pple b4...and may haf encountered such cases of being unable to make decisions....some of the people...or gals that we no even haf this totally bad impressions on the creature called guys...due to personal exp or having heard of real-life stories from other people...evrything from the v start...courtship has to be initiated by guys(e general behaviour n belief...not all...but most)...during quarrels the guy has to give in be it he is in the right or in the wrong...when the gal is feeling not happy she has evry right to show it to the guy....but when the guy is unhappy and he shows it out...he can easily be blamed for taking it out on the gal by the gal(lousy sentence structure?)...when a guy says some wrong words the gal can just choose to declare a cold war....but when the gal says smt wrongly the guy just has to live with it....got many more pts but dun wanna drag bout it...

coming to the main point...aren't females and males supposed to be equal?? why is it guys always haf to be blamed for being the evil creature?...not always i agree but most of the time??? guys r still humans not matter wat...guys do haf feelings n do feel emotions of remorse...sorrow...wu2 ke2 nai4 he2 de4 qing2 xu4...evry single emotion that a gal has guys haf an equal chance of having...but society shapes us such that we haf to appear as the more well...void of emotions...courage has to be mustered to express his feelings for some1...dignity has to be swallowed to avoid a conflict...sorrow has to be buried to ensure joy...and heartbeat has to be endured when rejected...and for the guys who haf initiated breakups...sometimes it hurts them more to say goodbye than for the other party to hear goodbye...guys r guys...guys haf been born to haf some characteristics of being guys...the same thing as gals being born to be the more emotional of the two(most of the time)...some of these characteristics may not the good...but it is just innate....but it isn't all the guys in the world who r totally overflowing with these behaviours all the time...in such matters of the heart guys too do haf to put it alot...besides rships...in normal day life as friends and as colleagues or as any with other interactions...alot of the good is overlooked and the negatives r almost without fail picked up n blames n curses r dealt out...so i just wanna say to well...hu eva hu reads this...b4 scolding any guys or cursing or throwing tantrum or anything...try thinking bout wat r the nice things that they haf done instead and see for yourselves which is the more overwhelming output by them...

haha..since this post is already sure to stir up some counter-attacks...i mite as well add this line...haha...a personal opinion i'd been wanting to declare for a long time...abit no link to paste here.....but yeah....(not directed to any1....esp qianzzz) thou only 18(n adults of cos deem this age too young)...but haf seen a few cases of pple fearing to accept others or even others a chance...cos of previous failures and/or the failures of those ard them...even cases where the person does have feelings for the other...but wat i want to say is that by protecting ourselves from being hurt simply by inflicting the pain on others when we cease to try....we r not just being selfish....we r being unfeelings...we are all humans...the distinguishing factor of us from animals is the ability to have feelings...recognise our feelings...develop our feelings...and by refusing to recognise our feelings...we render ourselves unfeeling creatures...which degrades us to the very top of our evolutionary chain...back to the unfeeling primates that we now see at the zoo...so to all those pple...take the next few yrs to grow up.....

ta-da....wah....like q long le....pt 2 next time den say...if i can rmb wat it is....and to pple who see this post...(acty h u else besides the 5 of us will see this? hmmm...) but anw...neva write essay plan la....so damn no organisation...den e pts oso like q rubbish sometimes...haha....that's just the way i blog...off to meet erm...qiu1 gong1....(-_-)zZzZ